Gaycation

A friend taught me a long time ago that one of many interesting ways to meet new people when going to new towns is to have a nice, blistery shiner. A maxillary orbital sunset, as it is. What stranger isn’t going to weep compassionately for the poor dipshit with a black eye? [...]

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Great Job, Hoss.

It has occured to me more than once recently that I have a lot of shit going on. There are a million goals for me to score, and goddam I only have one stupid ball. Yeah, great sports analogy. I hate sports. Great Lance Armstrong analogy. I have two balls. [...]

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Virginia is for lovers

Virginia. Where parents get 27 months in prison sound for hosting a party for their son’s 16th birthday party and providing alcohol.
Their mom, Elisa Kelly, and her ex-husband, George Robinson, are paying the price for hosting Ryan’s 16th birthday party — more than two years in jail each. Ryan had asked his mother to buy [...]

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More whiskey, indeed

I was three years younger than Paris Hilton is now when I got thrown in the Denver City-County Jail drunk tank in 1977 because a buddy of mine got lippy with a salty Colfax copper during my going-away party (I had just graduated college and was moving to Vermont, so a few of us thought [...]

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Unwritten Law.

It’s an unwritten law that Bavaria will have more holidays than the rest of Germany. I know this because today is ‘Corpus Christi’. whatever that means. Its not a set day, but falls on 60 days after easter. This year it is also known as a ‘Brückentag’ (Bridge-day) Yup. It is exactly what it sounds [...]

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Students invent alcohol powder

I wonder if this stuff mixes up well in a water bottle? It can’t be worse than some of the shit I’ve been drinking.

Dutch students have developed powdered alcohol which they say can be sold legally to minors…
Top it up with water and you have a bubbly, lime-colored and -flavored drink with just 3 [...]

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Unkie Will’s in town

Happy, happy. Joy, joy.

My daughter standing next to the 1.75 of Grey Goose her Uncle rolled in with today.
He went nuts at Cosco down in Phoenix because where he lives, they don’t sell booze at Cosco. He showed up with two cases of all kinds of hooch. Thats just to [...]

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