“The one thing that never gets old, is new strange.”
The Legbreaker

shit Im glad Monday is fucking over.

Snake

Just got home, checking email and the like. What’d I get? I got this:

Bernard Hinault taking out the slack.

When I work from home, I watch what’s going on outside. Dope boys come and go from the house across the street. He seems to be the steady supplier for many. I often wonder what drug he sells. His kids come over here to get their bikes fixed. Not once have they ever thanked us. Dominic has even built up junk bikes from the LBS for these kids. Do you think their fucking drug selling parents even give a shit?

I rode 213 miles this week. Enough said.

No trail riding anytime soon. Unless I drive 4 hours to Ray’s, the MTB won’t be used much till May which really sucks. I hate to have a new bike and not be able to ride it the way it’s supposed to be ridden.

Not related at all to cycling but something I found interesting:
They call it Mellow Yellow. I am thinking it is NOT a good sign to have a government controlled strain of marijuana. Scary shit.

Early Runaways. As in, jailbait. One of my favorite songs – WASTED.

it’s weekend as fuck over here.  time to get cracking.

never pick up hitch hikers.  DO pick up beer.  and while you’re at it, pick up some cigs, and since you’ve come this far, you may as well just go ahead and rent some videos.  do it, sissy.

celebrate the re-launch of this site.  i could spend hours up in that joint.  i DO spend hours up in that joint.  i’m playing an open hand here tonight, skidmarks.  all cards on the table.

while you’re at it, should you need to brush up on all the various types of bitches, this is the source.  you gotta fucking go there.  check that shit out, and if you don’t get it, i don’t get you.

peace, weekenderz.  keep it swervy.

Two years ago, I bought a chain
fattest chain I could find at Bimsco Hardware on Stone Avenue.
Tonight I did the same thing I’ve been doing
three nights in a row, and that is
yin within yang: sitting by the woodstove
listening to BBC World News
and chain smoking from my mesquite pipe.

But this time I got something accomplished.
I pulled that chain, smoking, out of the used motor oil
a hellish stink swirling in the cool wind.
I said:
“Harden the fuck up, chain.” and I laughed.

Protect the Landshark [“never get out of the boat”]
Absolutely god-damned right. That’s my BIKE.
but MY bike is going in a box, and then in a trunk.
(There is your wife, and then there is your rose rouge)

That perfect lover, that perfect fit
that fitted with me, and loved me -
I had her for only five weeks.  It was sweet.

But this bike – this perfect fit masterpiece…
I get to keep her forever. And I will.

“Harden the fuck up, mate.” [remember: “The mountain is my woman now and she beats me.”]
“Right.” Turn the cup [Your love is in a box].
Opening it will be softening into joy; into a spring ride. [liberation, strength, the way]
And I’ll say:
“GOD DAMN what a sweet bike.”

Yang within yin: gathering wood.
Yin within yang: sitting by the woodstove.

in keeping with Snake’s theme

It’s all about the Attitude

Its that simple. Life is what you make of it. If you want to bitch and complain about shit then do it. Dont expect anyone to listen to you for very long. Why would they. Its like Big Pun always said. Less talkie and more doie. Its fine to bitch and moan but what are you going to do about? What are you actually going to do about it?

One of the best stories that I have ever heard is this.

A teacher is his/her classroom. The class slowly files in and sits down. The teach calls for everyone’s attention. The teacher has everyone stand back up and stand next to their desks. Then the teacher tells everyone to look under their chairs. To all the students delight there is a dollar bill taped to each and every chair. The Teacher then says take the dollar and sit back down. Then the Teacher says to the class, “what is the moral of the story?” The moral is this if you want to make a buck then your going to have to get off your ass and do something.

Im not saying we should go out and chase the dollar. What I am saying is that if you want change then your going to have to go out and get it. Your going to have to get off your ass and find it. Its fine with me if you want to bitch about how tough you have it. But you had better be heading out the door to make a change while your doing it. Because I will listen for a bit to you, but if your not moving forward with it, then you my friend are part of the problem.

Snake

Thanks Missy.

I promise people: The next posting I make will be poetic and positive. But for now, I’m opening the door of my hurt locker to allow you to look within. It is a desperate grasp for commonality that I can’t find in the people I see today. My hope in humanity is at an all time low.

I was in the area’s only bike shop yesterday, buying some brake pads for the ONE bike I’ve been hired to repair in the 7 weeks I’ve had a flyer up. (and there is NO bike ship in Mt. Vernon, only a ski shop) A guy was thinking about buying one of those TREK hybrid bikes and I said: “That one is a really good one because it had clearance for fenders.” He said:

“Why would I want to put fenders on a bike?”

[meaning: I don't ride in the rain]

I hate this place. I am not making a negative commentary about an overall good experience. It sucks ass in Count Vermin. I’m in a lonely, alienated existence, which is dotted with a few simple joys like taking Lance out for a run to town on Sunday (the only day it’s not CRAZY traffic) and enjoying my coffee at the cafe before I go to the very enjoyable, quiet and warm law library (my house is neither).

It may make no difference to complain about this, but I’m incredulous as I climb the hill on the way over to the I5 overpass, being passed by one after another after another car as I get to inhale the fumes of their ill tuned engines (cheap to the point of total falsehood) and I ask, at the top of my lungs:

“Why doesn’t anyone here RIDE A BIKE?” I cannot answer that. I can only continue my careful preparations to leave, and make the case for bicycles where I am not the only fucking person doing it.

So Rock’s Dead and Flyod’s racing for Bahati Foundation Team. Never saw that one coming. I figured Floyd would be answering a few questions for Inspector Clouseau right about now or giving up racing to work for The Geek Squad, seeing as he’s dabling in IT these days…

Landis will serve two roles – as rider and ambassador for the Bahati Foundation, with the organisation aiming to ’support inner-city youth and garnering positive attention through his [Landis'] success on the bike’.

The move comes after Landis had made moves to join Rock Racing in an attempt to return to European racing given that Michael Ball’s outfit received a Professional Continental licence. He only competed in the team’s uniform once however, at the Tour of the Bahamas.

Time will tell if Landis is up for the challenge or whether he’ll fall flat on his arse like he did while riding for OUCH-Maxxis. I’m guessing the latter, but the secondary team role of wheel fetcher might be a good fit!

More over at Cyclingnews.com.

This is going to be a pretty weak post. Mostly because the riding is off the hook right now in the desert southwest and I have better shit to do than type. So here it goes:

This might be the link of the week so far, keep hitting refresh notahipsterbecause.com.

A few years ago I had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of this guy named Tony, he makes nice bikes. He just finished the women’s prize for the 2008 SSCXWC (Singlespeed Cyclocross World Championships) and it is a fine machine. You can see the Flickr gallery of it here. Nice bikes are worth the wait.

There is a good amount of stuff going on in my town and one worth mentioning is the Brides of March . Seems like it is going to be a rowdy good time while wearing a dress. It might be worth checking out just to spectate.  Unfortunately I will be out of town…maybe next year.

This just in from nyhc00: BMX meets “art” probably NSFW.

The next two days are stacked with good music for me. Tomorrow night is the the legendary Cro-Mags. If you don’t know this band, study up.  Our friend Bikesnobnyc summed up that the singer John Joseph as being “so tough he probably keeps “fixies” in his Saxo Bank jersey pocket and eats them instead of Clif Bars”.  Here is a little video of the man, you decide. 

Another old hardcore guy and bike rider, Tim Barry, will be here too. Formerly the lead singer of the band AVAIL and now tours solo doing this punk country/acoustic/folk type stuff. It’s good shit and it goes well with whiskey. I would highly recommend checking his tour dates and trying to catch him when he comes near your town.

See ya next week. Until then… keep it dirty.

First up is boombaird who chimed in with regards to Hitler getting his grubby hands on everything.It turns out that the MI5 was actually worried that these fine fair “Hitler Youth” might be on reconnaissance efforts in the early days of the onslaught. Another headline read “Nazis must be spyclists”. Such wit for 1937.

Interesting. Full read over at timesonline.uk and an alt version via the bbc complements of grumskikorsakov.

Fortunately, the plan failed. Thus, we have the ensuing success of diversity to gander at, which is undeniable:

pat pat... good game gurl.

Yea, that works for a brother. Makes me think about updating the track suit. Thank you Judi. Of course, since we won that shit, we also have the ever persistent American overcompensation to deal with because awesome is a state of mind:

While I’m relatively unfamiliar with this species “TRIATHLETE”, I’m guessing there a Prius, a cancer foundation or a marine animal  involved. Good luck with accolades n shit gral. You deserve every drop, timed with the wrist watch.

general opinion

That last pic was provided by Dirty, spied at the 24 hours in the old pebble somewhere around his booze encampment. I believe it may have been the only gnome out there this year. My, how times change.

Happy Tuesday.

www.natebloch.com

I cant figure out how embed this vid so here is a link.

Now grow a set and get out there and ride.

Snake

Happy fucking Monday as well. Thank god its fucking over already. Sleep tight group ride in the morning with some tack on afterwards.

….when you get home from a hard ride and you can hardly think straight and the adrenaline is still pumping and you gotta let the dogs out and you need food and you’re looking at your text messages and about 20 other things are going through your head……

At this exact moment, that’s how I feel. My heart is still thumping. My shoes are still on. The dogs are in the backyard, and unless I look directly at the keyboard, I can’t type a single word right.

I LOVE the feeling of coming home with trashed legs and a sense of accomplishment. It’s like fucking crack to me.

THIS is what it’s all about folks.

P.S. BJ – we need new categories. None apply.

Sometimes it is not about the ride, distance or difficulty…it is simply about the respect of the kit.  Not only the kit, but the attention to the tire pressure. The old guy obviously respects his kit and the pressure due to the fact that my friend saw him check and recheck the pressure in each tire three times to verify the necessary numbers. If only his kit matched his ride…

-perry

Just look at that player. Pimp shoes matched up to a pimp’ed out kit. This man holds a halo over the Gray Wolf as he lays wake to the field.

Need to blow an hour? I did. And this is how I did it.

Honestly, I was typing away as this played in the background. I haven’t watch more than a few minutes of the video. It appeared to be a fine day over across the pond. No so much of the spray tan & fist pump action that made the Jersey Shore the endearing trainwreck that it is. But, fun all the same.

Requisite “safe for work” language – I am almost positive there is at least one (1) naked body in there somewhere. This is Space we’re talking about, after all.

Drunkenness, hangovers, and debauchery tend to come to mind when one thinks about alcohol and its effects. But could alcohol also have been a catalyst for human civilization?

According to archaeologist Patrick McGovern this may have been the case when early man decided to start farming. Why humans turned from hunting and gathering to agriculture could be the result of our ancestors’ simple urge for alcoholic beverages.

“Alcohol provided the initial motivation,” said McGovern, a biomolecular archaeologist at the University of Pennsylvania Museum. “Then it got going the engine of society.”
Read the rest: www.independent.co.uk/news/science/archaeology…

And here is a joke. Because sometimes we just really need one.

From: Mr. Bill
Subject: How do you know when love fades?

A man was sitting on the sofa watching TV when he heard his wife’s voice from the kitchen. “What would you like for dinner, Love? Chicken, beef or lamb?”

He said, “Thank you, I’ll have chicken.”

She said, “Fuck You. You’re having soup. I was talking to the cat.”

Thanks to Mr. Bill for that one. Made me laugh out loud in the law library when I read his email. I always get a kick out of those moments when I lose it and people stare at the square old guy with kids who studies by himself. They have no idea…

More of Mr. Bill at Bills Bike n Breakfast, Linden, TX.

Charlie Brooker – How To Report The News

And now, the link dump:
Now, this is how you put on jeans (Barely SFW)
Indy Custom Cornhole
Did this band rip the DC logo?
The Bud Light clothing drive

Paris-Nice Cometh:
Paris-Nice 2010: The Big Preview
AFLD to snub UCI at Paris-Nice
Paris-Nice serves up a treat
Weekend Preview – Murcia, West Flanders, L’Eroica, and the Race to the Sun

I’m going to be, of all places, in Texas next week. Del Rio, Texas. I look forward to doing a whole lot of nothing. I, of course, will have to bring school work with me. As they say, the river never stops flowing.

See all that sun? It’s going to be glorious outside today and I am stuck in here. All day. From 10a-10p. And everyone on facebook is posting pictures of being outside.

Everyone’s out riding. Enjoy it. Spring is coming. I can feel it. The kids on our street are outside playing. They’ll all be banging on our front door soon to ask Dominic to fix their bikes.

***********

Just as soon as I typed that a little kid was banging on the front door asking for me to pump his tires up. Which I did. His Mommy and Daddy sell drugs for a living. And live in the Section 8 house across the street.

Hill ride with Ryan tomorrow.

Omloop Het Nieuwsblad 2010 – (1/4) The hills
Tom Boonen is as explosive as ever. The form looks very, very good. Heinrich Haussler also looks to be on form. No lack of confidence in that young man.

Omloop Het Nieuwsblad 2010 – (2/4) Flecha attacks
Flecha lights the dynamite. Boom!

Omloop Het Nieuwsblad 2010 – (3/4) Final kilometers
Haussler looks fantastic in the finale . Same with Tyler Farrar.

Omloop Het Nieuwsblad 2010 – (4/4) Interview Flecha
Big ups to VDB. Class.