What I drive past every day, redux

I was going to post this as an update to my “What I drive past every day” piece from yesterday. But, it got long enough (and with a video embed) that I figured it was time to call ’em up to the majors. Welcome to the Big Show. Don’t stare at the lights. And remember to wave to the crowd. They’re the reason we’re here.

I may not have been clear in what I wrote yesterday, so I wanted to clarify – I was not suggesting it is a left v. right political issue. Only that both sides of this particular street leading up to the corner I turn at every day is saturated with this madness. And, one side has all white cars while the other is unfailingly black. It’s just weird. I should take a photo one morning as the light gleams off these monster automobiles. I feel like I’m driving through an auto-mall.

The stickers are all for McCain. This is Arizona. 90% of what I’ve seen on cars (and used to see staked out in front lawns) was McCain-Palin. Or, in some cases, McCain-MILF. Which just freaks me out. About as much as this video:




Damn turkey never knew what hit ‘em.

And, remember, when shoving turkeys into a metal funnel so you can remove their heads and let ’em shake out their last moments on this planet without getting your shirt dirty, former GOP vice-presidential candidates choose to wear Burberry.

About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

76 Replies to “What I drive past every day, redux”

  1. You should check out THIS Podunk little shithole (Hancock, MD) for freakin’ localism. The Mrs. and I have been here for 27 years. We’ve been paying a mortgage on the same house for 15 years. Our daughter (now 18) has known no other hometown. And STILL we are outsiders*.

    *Not that I give a fuck.

  2. FYI man from the mitten:

    who was sitting in a corner by him/her self? what the fuck are you even talking about? you speak as if you know us? the dynamics at work in our little corner of the universe are multifaceted and you have no idea (let alone most on this site) what’s going on.

  3. So you are saying there’s top-secret mutant mountain bikers in Flagstaff? Shit man, when I move there, I bringing my gun for sure.

  4. …and I thought I lived in a cute little hick town. Can’t find me specs, is this DC or DWanker?

  5. …elgruppomutanto…

    …lemme say it again…“jeezus h krist, what are you, like fifteen w/ this shit ???

    …you are defending a position of idiocy…

  6. a position of idiocy? defending what? there’s nothing being ‘defended’ here and nothing that needs defending. what else do you have besides the 3 usual suspect rebuttals:
    1) you’re gay.
    2) your dick is small.
    3) you’re young and immature.

    hit us with something substantive and quit the shallow dismissals. locals are for real. that simply cannot be argued or defending. at least it’s snowing on the peaks. perhaps such a fortuitous event can shift the discussion around here. and yahoo for you, at least you can go sledding now. i hear hart prarie is going off right now. just don’t forget the chains.

  7. elguppo… Pot. Kettle. Black.

    Jeez. Flagstaff was on my list of places to consider when I’m done getting my PhD. If you are representative of the cycling community I might pass. Do you beat people up when they get close to your wave? I deal with too many ass-holes in my life as it is. Way to represent.

  8. I think if you get caught riding a local trail at the wrong time (Local’s time) you get punched in the face and they stomp your spokes out.

    Or worse yet, they pull down your lycra shorts and all laugh at your small dick, call you a homo etc.

    May be a bit off on this, more like a wild guess.

    Or the ultimate horror, you move into town and they sell you a wicked overpriced piece of property.

  9. …el gusano…

    …you are myopic…get help but do it local…the real world beyond yer door will be scary for you…

    …& as regards your little finger pointing fantasy: “what else do you have besides the 3 usual suspect rebuttals:
    1) you’re gay.
    2) your dick is small.
    3) you’re young and immature.”

    …dude, if the shoe fits, be my guest, wear it…

  10. pirata @59: Oh the humanity, a local might BENEFIT from someone moving new coming to town….

    spore @60: Kid deserved it. That was an etiquette issue, not a local v. interlopers issue.

  11. “…dude, if the shoe fits, be my guest, wear it…”

    …clearly you thought deeply about this…way to articulate.

  12. so easy to hate, so hard to contemplate. i am so sick and tired of people who say they “hate the grateful dead”. have you really listened to the band? have you seen the band? i admit, i am an equal fan of early suicidal, dead kennedys and milkmen, SOD, blackflag, misfits, badbrains, etc. but come on, how can anyone HATE the dead? i knew when my buddy posted this it would elicit the typical “hate that band response”. but seriously, do you hate “dead heads” or the band? two different things. with all do respect BJ, do you really hate a band that did so much and you know so little about? generic. you couldn’t be a black-sock-wearing cyclist, angst-ridden neoliberal and admit to liking the good olde GD. and to hate a band more than “anything”..what about liver and onions; genital warts; flat tires; texans; phoenicians (sorry); downhillers; born again republicans???? whatever. hate sucks, no matter to what or whom it is directed.

  13. Yeah, hate’s not cool. And music shouldn’t be described in absolute terms–it’s a matter of taste. When I contemplate the Dead’s music, I think of words like woefully tedious, wandering, dissonant, aimless, pained, flaccid, uninteresting, beat-less and grueling–the aesthetic equivalent to a feast of cold stale toast, a star-studded migraine headache, the nagging discomfort of low-level tooth pain, or time spent in Phoenix. Worse even than this:

  14. el jefe, per #63: “pirata @59: Oh the humanity, a local might BENEFIT from someone moving new coming to town….”

    Said tongue in cheek. I can’t honestly mean that without being the ultimate hypocrite as I have been the beneficiary of inflated real estate sales, and I didn’t put a gun to anyone’s head. If someone is willing to pay the asking price (or overbid on it), then so be it…that is their choice. Very rarely do you move to an area without a choice, so dealing with real estate and other prices is usually part of the decision.

  15. the Dead were/are completely awesome, though I thought they peaked in the mid-70s. Bill Graham his own bad self sold me my ticket and wished me a good time in Eugene OR in, uh, 1978 or so, and I fucking did. Hitchhiked all night back to Seattle, went straight to work. And I liked it. You talk about American music, the Dead stands up.

    Regards,

    Mikey

  16. Yes, tay, it’s a matter of choice. you chose some choice words to describe your dislike (read hate) but again, all boils down to a matter of taste. would you prefer some soul (ass) cracker circa 1994?

  17. Never listened to much Dead when I was coming up. Mostly a factor of so much great stuff to listen to and so few hours in the day. But what I heard I mostly liked.

    Deadheads, otoh-Can’t say I hated ’em; sure couldn’t understand why all the hubbub. Best I can figure it was 90% about the community (and the drugs); 10% about the music. There did seem to be a pretty strong “live and let live” vibe to the whole thing though. Got to say I can’t argue with that.

  18. pirata @ #71: Understood. I was pointing out the hypocrisy as well. In Austin there are tons of “locals” who complain about all the people moving in over the past decade and changing the city. You don’t hear too many of them complain about their property values going up unless their paying their tax bill. They are all REAL happy come sale time, but I guess if you were here during “Slacker” you get to complain…