Fixie kids…

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I’m getting sick and tired of these kids that think they’re running shit. No one ever did a trick on a fixed gear before last spring.

Yo, I’ve got a news flash for ya: They’ve been doing it for years. Since 1889.

You ain’t done shit ‘cept wear your sisters pants.

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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

32 Replies to “Fixie kids…”

  1. Maybe I aint as Old Skool as I think I am, but at least my fixie is from last century.

    And yeah, I was wearing Dickies before it was cool, then it wasn’t cool, now its cool again.

    Don’t even get me started on Major Taylor.

  2. Big Jonny, et al–

    I’m trying to sell my old ‘cross bike and a major feature is its downtube shifting which enables a kid to throw a 360 tailwhip by merely disconnecting the front canti brake. How cool is that? I need to find one of these fixie kids, he’ll buy it. Cash only, no checks, hear what I’m sayin’, brah?


  3. …i’ll give some a’ these kids ‘huevos props’ but yer right, not much new under the sun…

  4. and what’s with the fast front wheels? i’m a former state TT champ and i don’t have a trispoke. i’ve seen those around SF and don’t get it. what are they doin’ besides looking cool?

    anyone got a tri-spoke or deep profile rim they can spare me? apparently they’re good for trials.

  5. You ain’t done shit ‘cept wear your sisters pants.

    yes, amen. Really love the tight rolled up pants look.
    and the deep dish rims.

  6. fix for training. fix for turning left on banked tracks, preferably indoor. fix for acrobatic cycling which also has been around the circus for centuries.
    bmx freestyle, urban huck & jump, trials bikes – those tricks seem a wee bit more fun to watch than some tool in shants spinning his 400$ front wheel around it’s pretty colors.


  7. i found my people. if you live in AZ, show up sunday at 8pm at the rouge bar and we are gonna have down home old school fixie race through the streets of tempe with an absurd amount of drinking a bottle of scotch for the winner. no girl pants or aerospokes required


  8. yup talkin shit is sooo not not passe but other than kneez hurtin for the rest of forever i do find it rather heartening that the trend, as it may be, that seems to draw the most ire at the moment, girl-pants wearin’ fixxie hipsterz, still happen to be on the simplest bike there is, so there is that, which is nice… oh and as for things looking cool, like goofy aero wheels and stuff, it sure makes me sad that so many bikerz who are above that pretty much want all their shit to look like

  9. twitchy fingerz, want there shit to look like absolutley emotion-less (read color less- identity less) lifestyle they lead.. so yeah i sure think black specialized pulled out of the back of black S.U.V’z are a real nod to the barriers that have grown up around the person who may or may not have ever been able to HOOT and holler and express just how FUCKING SWEET RIDING BIKEZ IS!!!!!
    cuz thats all there isl, (except for that part when we’re not riding bikes- just typing away…) peas

  10. The hipsters gatta roll thier pants up, otherwise they look like one of the dudes from a 1990’s metal band. And that ain’t hipster…hampster. When is this gunna end so I can go back to being a dork? Cuz I am by far not a hipster.

  11. Slappy wrote:
    “oh and as for things looking cool, like goofy aero wheels and stuff, it sure makes me sad that so many bikerz who are above that pretty much want all their shit to look like”

    Never once, unless I am on a team ride or a club ride with my team and club, have I ever seen anyone with a bike like mine. Never once while riding the loop on my Guerciotti cross bike or my SE BM flyer have I seen anyone with the same bike as me.

    I have however been on a group ride with my fixie and seen people with the exact same frame and wheels. If you go to midnight ridazz there will two hundred IRO black frames, with green, orange, red velocity deep v rims, pedals and straps, grips on cut bars. There will be 100 people on red and white centrurions (however you spell it) with the housing mounts on the top tube cut off and then taped over. grips of people will have Nishikis. They will all be wearing black slip ons, or all black chucks, with womens pants rolled on both sides up to just below their knees. They will have black hoodies and the same fucking chrome bags.

    The only problem with the fixie kids of today is they act like they invented the wheel. They act as if no one before their generation ever rode fixies in large groups, or did tricks, or anything like that. I got called a hanger on at Midnight Ridazz one night about a year ago.
    “Huh?” i said.
    “Well you are older and doin the whole fixie thing.”
    “How long you been riding a fixie?” I asked.
    “A year or so.”
    “how long you been riding bikes?” I inquired.
    “Oh this is my first one since I was like seven, I use to ride a skateboard but this seems more pure. What about you?”
    “Oh I just ride” and rode away

  12. From my vantage point in the deep south, where this trend is just starting to trickle, I found that stuff pretty cool to watch. But having only read BSNYC screeds about the fixie freestylers, I was surprised to find some beauty in it. Until that one kid ran the four way stop downhill. In San Franciso. Dumb.

    In summation, who cares.

  13. The Christian right needs to stop worrying about homosexuals, and start going after these kids. They are so much gayer than gay marriage!

  14. Look, man, I laid down some rubber. Wow. You fucking tool.

    Skidz are for Squidz.

  15. i know some of the guys in the macaframa vid you embedded. yes, they think they are the shit, and yes, they think they invented it all. fucked up thing is that they are old enough to have learned those tricks on their haro masters and hutch trickstars back in the 80’s, but didn’t. guess they were super dorks back then and are now trying to make up for it.

    pity, they like some high end track parts and are just trashing them on the street.

    don’t even get me started on how one of the dudes was arguing with me about how to glue a sew-up even though he’d never done it. i told him to go ahead and use that tufo tape BS on his cloth track tires and see how long he can go without stitches on his chin.

  16. i told him to go ahead and use that tufo tape BS on his cloth track tires and see how long he can go without stitches on his chin.

    what’s that the kids say? Word?

  17. Skidding was learned on coaster brake bikes. The other crap could be seen in any circus since before Christ pissed off the Romans. Some actually on a wire.