About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

25 Replies to “Tucson’s Gray Wolf”

  1. cookie belt – $2
    stone age walkman – $20
    2 gal. milk (one choco one white) – $6.00
    space age 12lb. bike – $12,000
    Crazier than a Shithouse Rat = Priceless!

  2. Is this The Onion of cycling?
    If not, gawd bless guys like that for supporting the high end bike industry.
    Where can I get a belt? Do they make ’em in Carbon Fiber?
    mmmmm Donuts.

  3. I may have seen this guy at a grade school with a fishing pole and a pack of skittles on the line casting from behind a bush. Not sure though. He is right about one thing. Who would ever THINK about riding with a pair of wheels that cost less than six grand. Bush league for sure. Bush league; hmmm,coincidence????

  4. Don’t have time to listen to the video, but I’m pretty sure this is the dude I’ve seen around town on the all black bike – with one freakin’ brake. I’m sure you don’t need two brakes most of the time, but I gotta think you’d give anything to have those few grams back when you need ’em.

  5. so he’s runnin’ 56X21, that’s like 71.4 wheel inches, the same as 32X12 (give or take) he could save a few more ounces on steel..

  6. The cornerstone of every great diet: SUGAR!!

    Oh, and take the bus if there is a hill along your ride.

  7. As I was contamplating if/how to comment, Gray Wolf mentioned that a saddle ruined his sex life. Uh..um..yeah, that’s how it happened.

    Is this guy related to the other “GW”?

  8. I’ve been on a group ride when this guy comes up from the other direction, he turns in the road and starts to follow us. When he catches up he begins howling and barking. He rides without a helmet, so my first thought is that he’s stupid, now after further review I see that he’s really just five cans short of a sixer.

  9. Anyone who has ever worked in a bike shop knows these kind of time wasting gram counting dorks. I wish I had a gun under the counter for these types of people (just kidding) but seriously- get a life and get OUT OF THE SHOP!!!

  10. “You’ve got a deep tan for somebody who doesn’t drink a lot of water.”

    Perfect deadpan.

  11. Ya’ll know this is satire, right? (“I’m hardcore, my shit was made by the cannibal. I take public trans up the hill.”) Otherwise, you are the slap dick. Facetiouserosity.

  12. Obvious proof of the deadly combination of chocolate milk and extreme heat. What a wack-job! Totally in need of a reality check! Remember the old biker-dude “Thunderduck” in Flag, who recently passed, that wore the kung-fu outfit on his scaffold bike with upturned bars to Crystal creek everyday. Must be related. Pawning medication for bike parts, nice.