super fitness tips from the PROS!

Looking to get stiff quick? Hey. Are you (finally and for real) tired of sucking? Ready to get it together and really turn it around? Take sacks to the face whenever you can?

Well, you’re in the right spot. Answers to follow…

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Quit blowing all a these fine opportunities to podium. To wit, the Full Wolf Moon. That’s right, you heard right. Sunday coming up is the latest in a series of events designed to make you a better rider. 12 times a year you get the possibility to roll out on your local bullshit and have it easily transmuted into a whole new experience. Some go so far as to whisper about how magickal it is, and I’m with them.
http://www.newbalanceshoesinc.com new balance 1500
If you got some trails or backroads with clear exposure, those are your huckleberries. Shift your weight around, let that front end ride, and use the force. Pack some warm clothes in which to stand around the out-of-the-way-spots whilst dranking whatever it is y’all drank.

For reals. If you haven’t tried this hott action you can’t know how sweet it is. I personally don’t give a shit what type of bike you ride, or who made it, or any other isms and schisms. Get on that bike and HOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWL.

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8 thoughts on “super fitness tips from the PROS!

  1. Pingback: super fitness tips from the PROS! | PEDAL CANTON

  2. I listen to Rap music like I listen to dog’s fucking. Which means I don’t.

    But the pool table bit drudged up an old old memory.

    Back when I was barely out of high skool…..we’re talking 1982. A buddy and I would drink a few cans of whatever and go to the hall and poorly play 9-ball for a while.

    Then one day these 2 guys…..hardcore….had a 1,000 buck a game gamble on 9-ball. The fat guy won. Looked like he walked off with 15k.

    Damn. Still amazed at that. I gamble like I ride a bike. Slow and sloppy.

  3. Hmmmm…9-ball, did they? Fat guy won, so you say. Yes, I believe I saw that movie.

  4. that’s what you 2 keyboard riders take away from this? fucking moron trolls, the both of you.
    try actually riding.

  5. Actual, I was riding a bike when you were just a drunken dirty thought in your daddy’s mind. Hell, I bet I’ve shit bigger than you.