STRAVA: System That Records All Vain Activity

There’s been some heat lately between us here at DC and the dudes over at STRAVA. It’s all good fun at the end of the day, but part of what makes Drunkcyclist what it is, is that our goal is to help keep the market honest. I’ll admit, STRAVA has a nice product; it maps well, it tracks workouts well, and it has created a sort of social athletic competition, which also works well, I just question its purpose. That’s my opinion, you don’t have to agree, and I hope that if you don’t, you tell me how wrong I am in the comments.

Competition is good. I’m a free market guy, so yea, I like to butt heads and flex dick. However, context is crucial. That is to say, competition for a purpose is beneficial, whereas competition for ego, or power, is detrimental. Take craft brewing for example. They felt that us beer drinking, thumb-up-our-ass yuppies deserved better that what Miller and Coors and all the big dogs were pooping out. (I don’t really think we are yuppies, or like thumbs up our asses by the way) So they stopped mass-producing the piss water and created a voluminously hopped mutha that delivers a hoppy nose, assertive-but-balanced flavors of pale malts and hops from start to finish. Eventually, people started drinking the shit and now we have craft breweries spreading like STD’s at ASU. Shit son. Love me some of that.

So along those lines, before I get lost in this mindless cloud of beer infused banter, let’s get back to the point, STRAVA. We like to keep companies honest, and make sure that the consumer (you), is reminded of what the hell you’re doing when you slide your “fuck you finger” to unlock your iPhone and open the STRAVA app, becoming that Stravasshole that we so much despise. Why are you coming up hot on my wheel and screaming “STRAVA! STRAVA!” and expecting me to one, give a shit about your speed, and two, to get out of your way so you can become the King of the Mountain (KOM) on some egomanic program on your cell phone. Really? That’s not what riding a bike is about. It’s not about beating out some guy you don’t know on your phone app and creating stress in the lives of people enjoying their day on the bike. It’s about appreciating the fact you can even be out there on two wheels, feeling that wind in your face and riding in beautiful terrain that the majority of people can not, and will never experience. Take a breath, take a look around, think about how this won’t last forever, share a beer with some friends, tell a joke, and lighten up. Ditch STRAVA, or better yet, beat it. Learn how at Strava Terrorism.