First thing: Way cool. One of my favorite comedians, Patton Oswalt, is coming to the Rialto Theater on the 29th of April. F for Fat Fuck Nation.
Patton, if you can read this, please make some jokes about this ridiculous irony I see every day, to change my anger to laughter, because frankly, this shit ain’t funny:
What you are looking at is a pothole, one of thousands in Tucson’s streets, but this one is a special pothole because it is directly south of this sign:
The sign is along a very heavily ridden bicycle route: 4th Avenue. The City of Tucson decided that big, ugly, asphalt filled TRAFFIC CIRCLES would be a bicycle or pedestrian improvement. I have been nearly thrown from my bike several times by the pot holes in the neighborhood that this road is a part of, and the way drivers are reacting to the new idiot circles is more of a danger than ever, I have found. Does Tucson ride a bicycle? Clearly, its focus is keeping asphalt workers employed, but not on the simple, low cost tasks.
LIKE FILLING THE FUCKING POTHOLES. F: Failure to deliver. This sign is a very un-funny joke.
Tucson’s grade for being bicycle friendly: F for Fucked. Also, F for FUCK YOU, POLICE. While the government sits on deciding to make safe approaches to intersections without stopping legal, one of your asshole revenue generating ticket monkeys pulled me over for ‘failure to come to a complete stop’ – something I do hundreds of times a day, and it is not only completely safe but very necessary for me. If I had to come to a complete stop at every stop sign, my knees would be even more in pain than they are. Tucson, you just don’t understand. The random holes all over the city get bigger and remain un-filled. The police threaten to issue points on driver’s licenses for so called ‘violations’ on bicycles. F for Fraud.
The south side connector path still remains un-built. You still can’t get to 22nd on the Rillito path. Tucson’s government doesn’t give a an F – - F for Flying Fuck about the safety or peace of its cyclists. These white elephant projects just mock our common sense. Unlike other “bicycle friendly” cities, here it appears to be the intent.by