Nerves = Judi is a bitch for no reason.

loveland 002

We rode fixed today. Dominic practiced with me riding super close. He tapped me, slapped my ass, nudged me a bit, and I had to hold my line and not fuck up or get squirmy. I felt ok. I just don’t know how I am going to manage with a bunch of Cat 4 women this weekend.

The course is extremely tough. I managed to make it uphill the entire way with headwinds to boot. You may even get some gusting sidewinds just to keep you on your toes….. Right now, I am 98+% sure we will be using the smoother back up route as opposed to the original route with the 1-mile stretch of mudswamps and rim eating potholes.

That’s part of the email I got from Dave, the RD, regarding Germantown, the road race I am doing Sunday. It’s my first. I am scared. I am really scared.

Lame lame lame, I know.

Not related to cycling at all…..

jesse james

….. but I hate men who cheat. Real men do not cheat. I mean, come on. It’s not that I’m bitter because I caught a boyfriend cheating. My fucking Dad cheated on my Mom and fucked her up for life. If you don’t love your wife anymore, get a divorce. I was really disappointed in Jesse James. I liked him. Tiger can get fucked too. Blah blah blah. Fucking cocksuckers.

Detatchable Penis – some of you need one.
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About Judi

Bicycles are my salvation. They are my way of life. If you don't like it, then you can go straight to hell. Cincinnati, Ohio, USA

32 thoughts on “Nerves = Judi is a bitch for no reason.

  1. Good luck, I suspect you will do fine and when it is all over you’ll be thinking how easy/cool it was.

    If the course is truly hard that could be even better, maybe break things up more and hopefully make it easier to avoid people who are stupid tired. I would bet it will be better than a Cat IV men’s race!
    Whatever the case, hope you have fun.

  2. Judi,

    you will rock!

    Every woman who’s entered in that race feels the same as you.

    I raced Motocross in the 70s/80s & there wasn’t a race that I didn’t feel like puking at the start line, (seriously bad idea wearing a full face helmet).

    If this is your first Cat 4, you’ll PB regardless.

    You’ll make us proud.

  3. i hear you on the jesse james bullshit. i don’t care much for the whole celebrity gossip windmill (okay, yes i do. i’m a total bitch that way) but i too was kind of bummed out about a dude who previously seemed kind of stand-up through all of the network douchebaggery smoke and mirrors.

    try this guy on for a likeable kookinstead. way more worth the time, and admits he’s a bag of nuts.

    here, too.

  4. @SnakeHawk,

    I think that it’s the standard ID ten T error message.

    (Sorry, got that today & had to use it)

  5. Hey Judi, you ride like hell! Hollering for you from the other side of the world.
    ..and two great non-cycling pics!

  6. … and what about women who cheat? My wife’s been crawled up inside a bottle of red wine for about 3 years, and just crawled out to blow up the whole neighborhood by announcing she’d slept with her best friends husband.

    Alcohol+3 kids+depression+antidepressants=one great big fucked up mess.

    Sometimes, Judi, it ain’t the man.

    Stay single, fellers!

  7. Good luck on Saturday, Judi. Remember to also guard your shift/brake levers with your life; the shit I saw in Men’s Cat 3 & 4 when I used to race was darn right vindictive.

  8. How ’bout bunking in a hotel room with a buddy on a “guy’s weekend” and that guy brings a chick home at 2 am? And that chick ain’t his wife. And they wake you up with their “shenanigans?” And his wife has invited you to dinner the next day? That was last weekend for me. Some guys are dicks.

    I don’t seem to have that gene a lot of guys have that relegates thoughts of a significant other to the nether regions when a piece of strange is on hand. Been with the same girl for 19 years now…and she’s the only one I want.

    Good luck Judi.

  9. snake hawk – dominic totally loves the celebrity gossip shit too. i caught him with US magazines when we first met. oh, and your you tube links don’t work.

    @9 – how about standing up for your friends wife and telling the dumbshit to take his whore somewhere else?

    i won’t hang out with dudes who cheat. ESP with kids. same goes for women who cheat. or women who fuck men KNOWING they are married. i used to be friends with a girl who was having an affair with an older married man. i don’t hang out with her anymore. it just says something about the kind of person you are.

  10. Yeah I don’t get it either. Single women that date married guys. My wife used to have this freind that would only go out with married dudes. He would just fit her in for a side fuck when he could and she was like. “boy is wish i could spend more time with my boy friend but you know he is married and he can get away from his wife today” or another good one is “I am starting to get pissed off at him since he seems to only want to see me and have sex. I wish we could just go out to dinner and not have set all the time”. WTF…and this chick was smart. Had her MBA and had a good job etc but no fucking common sense. Wierd though she was hot and could probably find an unmarried dude but she kept going out with married ones. It was almost like a challenge to her to want to fuck up someone elses life.

  11. fucky fuck fucks. You’ll be aces Judi.

    Don’t stare at the wheels no matter how pretty they seem. If you gotta look around, put a hand on a riders back who is next to you to keep you inline with the flow of the pelican while you take a gander, and don’t overlap wheels unless you’re just getting bored.

    keep them elbows sharp.

  12. He is a total fuckin maroon.

    Chicks dig the challenge though, not all, but alot of them have this thing about always finding ‘something better’. I’m with ya’ though Judi, cheaters bite ass.
    I know how it is to be from a broken family ’cause someone couldn’t keep his dick in his pants.
    I also get to see first hand the fucked up relationships that it spawns and how girls always think they can ‘fix’ or ‘tame’ the bad boys and what that always leads to.

    Relation ships suck, so what can you do but ride? And kick some cat 4 ass right?

    Do watch those levers, a friend of mine used to give brake levers a ‘love tap’ on rides going up hill. It’s amazing how that can throw off your pace :)

  13. Sometimes I think I’d like to try racing. Maybe if I’d started thirty (okay, forty) years ago.

    And about the cheating thing-My Dad had a saying-“Why go out for a burger when you got steak at home?” Thanks, Dad. And thanks, Mrs. joetheelectrician. For real.

  14. whoever hooked my vids up, thanks. whoever keeps their shit in their pants, thanks even more. you make my stomach way less likely to empty itself in your face. sommer, that’s pukey fucked up shit, for sure. too bad you got such a shitty “friend.”

  15. Ur gonna do great. Sit in, hold a wheel and when its all over u wont be able to wait for the next one!! I did my first tues. night worlds up here in Seattle for the first time in 10 years. Felt the same way, afterwards was total rush!!

  16. …just remember, be polite…that’s “HOLD YER LINE !!!” not “HOLD YER FUCKING LINE, YOU BITCH !!!”…it’s a sponsorship thingy…bwaha…

    …judi, you are not only gonna be fine but at the finish, you’ll be wondering what you were so worried about at the start…take some deep breaths, mingle n’ talk w/ your teammates ‘cuz they’ve all “been there”…maybe dom gives ya a little shoulder massage before the start to keep your upper body relaxed…

    …you’ll figure out who’s wheels to ride & who’s squirrely that you should stay away from, so just pay attention, play to your own strengths & go for it, amiga !!!…
    …it’s pretty much a given that there will be chicks who’ll hammer hard enough at the start that you’ll figure you’ll never match that pace but it’s also practically a ‘bgw’s written guarantee‘ that if you stay focused & keep working w/ other strong riders, you’ll catch & even likely drop some of those fast starters…


    …jesse james…what a dipshit !!!…i feel bad for sandy b ‘cuz she stood up at several award shows & publicly thanked him for having her back & the whole time he was playing ‘who’s got more tats‘ w/ that skanky tart…

    …sandra…you are a beautiful, creative & intelligent woman…gimme a call & when i ask “do you ride a bike, luv ???”, i’m talking the pedal kind, baby…

  17. snake hawk – now you have dominic making me watch jason jesse videos. he tld me to tell you he’s seen him skate at an old school surf ohio skates demo.

  18. Judi- thanks for the epic videos of my cousin, J. Jesse. If any of us could ride bikes as well as he skates….well, shit. Speaking of success across the board: skating, family, companies owned, $$$$$$. Fucking coolest guy around.

    Girls cheat. Dudes cheat. At least Jesse James hooked up with a hot Suicide Grandma.

  19. um, yeah – hurben, you best be sharpening up on yer Bugs lest you not be on board wit the train of thought. or something.

  20. Yeah, and make sure you don’t take a wromg turn at Albequerqe, or all KINDS of shenanigans may ensue.

  21. I cheated once. I tried to pass a ‘T’ as an ‘F’ or vice versa on a quiz when I was a kid. I thought I was smart, and totally got busted. I got the symbol tattooed on my wrist as a reminder to never make that mistake again.