Ullrich lays fools out like ceramic tile.

I think this is from 2004, when Thomas Voeckler held the maillot jaune for ten days like a fucking champ. No idea what stage this is, only that it goes uphill. Ullrich is looking to claw back time on Armstrong. Don’t think he won the stage – I don’t think Ullrich won any stages that year. Voeckler in yellow? Had to be ’04.

My man Ullrich is laying fools out like ceramic tile in this one:

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And a Fat Boy Slim soundtrack? Forgetaboutit.

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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

16 thoughts on “Ullrich lays fools out like ceramic tile.

  1. wow, that brings back some great memories…

    a few days after doing l’Etape du Tour, my wife, cousin Andrew and i rode up Col de la Machine from Pont en Royans where we were camped- to this very KOM. i’m in the blue jersey and red Cannondale cap, just past the line on the rider’s right hand side, pounding the barriers like a crazed fool… in what will probably be my only Tour appearance, lol.
    the silence after the moto gendarmes blaze past, the sound of the helicopters approaching, the roar of the crowd coming up the mountain towards us, along with the riders still unseen… i still get goosebumps thinking about it and tears in my eyes.
    France is so beautiful, like a dream. i can’t wait to go back and do it all again.

    p.s. i have plenty of pics for any doubters and i’m happy to share. for everyone else, i strongly suggest making the pilgrimage to cycling’s holy land. you will never forget nor regret the experience of a lifetime.

  2. Music w/ Jan reminds me of our shit drug policies; Give the Poor Man a Break – if he wants to go out and have some vitamin E in the off season. That was the final nail in his retirement coffin unfortunately. Pathetic policy, how many other riders were doing things that actually were performance enhancing, while Jan went out for a fun night.

  3. Damn, must have been that V8 he drank in the morning…Or that nice fresh blood bag infusion. Either way, Jan’s on the gas and breaking legs. Poor Landis was pedaling squares.

  4. skunk— allez! They were popping like kernels in hot oil as he went by. Well-edited video too.

  5. ….schnitzle-boy was layin’ pipe like a plumber yeah….sure threw ol’ Floyd in the hurt-box…doper on doper action…

  6. Thanks for bringing back a great memory. Sad now because every rider they showed in 4min 9sec.but Voekler has been busted or accused of doping heavily. What made JU so exciting is after so many false starts you expected him to pop at any minute but hoped he would not and make it a contest. Still remember calling everyone after his TT win in the heat against LA thinking it was going to happen this year! Still remember vomiting in my mouth when he slid in the rain and kept waiving his car off the rest of the TT, loosing the tour opportunity. Time for the X after that.

  7. I agree, I have argued that doped racing is entertaining and in some parts of Europe almost just accepted and preferred. But doped to gills non the less.

    I personally prefer to see riders become vulnerable and eventually have a ‘jour sans’, or a bad day that costs them the race. More exciting when someone can pop and blow the whole race. Doped riders don’t pop.

    Some circles say screw it and may the best DOCTOR win. Compelling either way I guess.

  8. Funny how this seems like it was so long ago to me. Feels like Jan hasn’t raced in 10 years. Cool video.

  9. With all the L.A. hoopla, you forget what fuckin’ stud he was. (Yeah, they were ALL on the juice.) Jan was the last of the East German/Communist “lifers”. -Brought up through the Communist system from a young age, a la Stalin. I wish he were still around

  10. I think that Voeckler trying to hold onto yellow that year was the last piece of honest and heroic riding the tour has seen. Something about him says he’s clean unlike the rest of them fools. Allez my man!

  11. this video is awesome! bring back the juice…the modern tour is a boring snore-fest.
    look at the dope-fueled rage in his eyes…i have loads of respect for a freak that shoots-up and then jumps on his bike to attack a mountainside.
    way more enetertaining than an east village junkie streetcorner beggarbum.

    and landis getting stomped on is hilarious…guess he hadn’t found the right doctor yet.