zzzzz documents… zhey haz bean zuturned ovhar

Credit to Bush43 for the title of this one. I can’t come up with shit like that, I’m a dumb ass.

Like you don’t know that already.

German authorities said Tuesday they have received documents from doping expert Werner Franke which he claims show Tour de France winner Alberto Contador was involved in doping.

Franke said he has documents from last year’s Operation Puerto doping investigation in Spain which show that Contador, a Spaniard who won the doping-marred Tour on Sunday, had taken HMG-Lepori as a testosterone booster and an asthma product called TGN.

Source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com

I’ll tell ya this much, I’m getting sick and tired of buying up these domain names and making “I believe” pages for all these dopers.

The first one was Funny Ha Ha!

The second was Funny Oh No!

Now it’s just sad.

If I could Photoshop anything worth a damn I’d go with a pic of Contador jumping the shark.

I believe it’s over.

“We can confirm we have received the documents, and they will be incorporated into procedures of the district attorney’s office,” Christian Brockert, spokesman for Germany’s Federal Criminal Police Office, told The Associated Press.

Brockert said the federal office will meet with the district attorney’s office deemed to be responsible and assess the documents.

Contador, who rides for the Discovery Channel team, missed the 2006 Tour when his former team, Liberty, was disqualified because he and four other riders – plus the team director and doctor – were allegedly linked to Operation Puerto.

What is it with Discovery signing guys with black marks next to their name? Maybe they’ll get some convicted felons on the squad next year and give us something to cheer for.

Interesting quote from the same article:

Copies of the Operation Puerto investigation have surfaced so often in Germany that at one point a Web site – unrelated to any legal body – ran excerpts translated into German.

If anyone out can read/write/translate German and can find those pages (I’ve tried, but I could be looking at a recipe for chocolate chip cookies for all know) and feels like helping out, I’ll post it on Drunkcyclist.

Think of it as a learning experience.

For all of us.

* update *

There is a lot on the subject over at grg51.typepad.com/steroid_nation, a site I’ve been reading a lot lately.

** update 2 **

These two pdf links appear to be the goods. If you can read German:

interpool.tv/downloads/dopingbericht_guardia_civil_deutsch_1.pdf
interpool.tv/downloads/dopingbericht_guardia_civil_deutsch_2.pdf

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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

12 thoughts on “zzzzz documents… zhey haz bean zuturned ovhar

  1. I used to get up, make a cup of coffee, boot the computer, sit down, and read the cycling news for the day.

    Now, I get up, make the coffee, boot the computer, sit down, and read the doping news. I didn’t have to change my bookmarks at all.

    It’s not like being a sporting fan, it’s more like being a gossip magazine fan.

    How much pussy did that cow Britney reveal? How crazed was Lohan? What was the T/E ratio on Rider X? How did Team Y try to hide the proof that Rider Z had three times his normal blood volume? Who did that Rasputin Dr. Ferrari meet with in the parking garage? Oh wait, that last bit is true.

  2. BikePunk – more links I can’t read a damn word of. This first one has links to two pdf files. I’m guessing they are worth a look.

    http://allesaussersport.de/archiv/2006/08/30/ermittlungsbericht-der-operation-puerto-als-pdfs/

    These are the pdf links:

    http://www.interpool.tv/downloads/dopingbericht_guardia_civil_deutsch_1.pdf
    http://www.interpool.tv/downloads/dopingbericht_guardia_civil_deutsch_2.pdf

    Again, I can’t read it. But I did see the word “Actovegyn”. Which sounds a lot like “Actovegin”. Which US Postal was thought to be using back in 2000. It’s made of calf’s blood. Sound familiar? (Memory refresher link: sportsillustrated.cnn.com) They claimed it was to treat skin abrasions and mechanic Julien DeVries’s diabetes.

    This looks like a god damn gold mine, in Spanish:

    http://www.sportpro.it/doping/inchieste/operacionpuerto06.pdf

  3. i thought that he was cleared of all this now it is going to be brought back up. soon the yellow is going to designate the biggest dopers rather then the tour leader

  4. ok when winning becomes everyones main objectived regardless
    of what they feel deep inside.. sell out to the man..
    today i rode my cross bike with no clip shoes just to break
    away and maybe just enjoy riding again.. no lycra.. just
    like my old BMX days as a kid.. I know its off topic sorry
    but does anyone want to make this sport grow.. what happen to
    HEREOS?

  5. Apparently, 2nd is the new 1st now when it comes to the Tour. Is this going to become one of those hallowed Tour traditions?

  6. Think about your own riding or racing. You have some food, some caf, you hydrate, whatever your routine. You go out & enjoy being on the bike. The wind , the sun, the rain, the views even briefly glanced at cuz you’re focused. Hell, any bike ride is usually pretty awesome.

    The Pros that are dirty ? These guys live like fuckin’ junkies throughout the year. Needles, drugs, bags of blood, vials of insulin. Substances you’ve been told won’t harm you, but what do you really know ? Everything is timed to perpetuate the fraud. Subterfuge to hide the disgusting habits from teammates, wives, your children, the fans. The guilt you can’t really be immune to, despite your salary &/or accomplices support.

    Jeez, I hope Jonathan Vaughters gets good corporate support as he honestly tries to create a better scenario. CSC & T-Mobile are trying also but they’re so immersed in retro-bullshit, their reputations will questioned for years.

    I’ll always maintain that cycling & bike racing are beautiful sports. I only hope we get to appreciate the honest beauty of racing soon.

  7. Wow. Four years of German and pretty much all I can say now is, “Sie sind sehr SEXY!”

  8. Good work on sniffing those out BikePunk. Let me see if I can put my german skillz to work here. The spanish is the same as the german…and both are a shit ton of foreign language legalese. But there are some choice phone calls with the good doctor in there. Let me see if I can translate some of the highlights. As far as I can tell so far, it is just many of same names that keep popping up – “Ulli” and Tyler to name a few. Even the doctor’s sister, Yolanda, is in the thick of it. The Condor’s name is in there along with the rest of the 2005 Liberty Seguros – Wuerth team, but I don’t see anything that implicates him…yet

    Maybe Cadel will get his afterall…