I know Philly fans that are hoping T.O. goes out like Michael Irvin when the Cowboys visit the City of Brotherly love next Sunday. I've actually gotten emails foretelling season ending injuries to be handing out like "Welcome to Philadelphia" coffee mugs. It seems there is no love lost for T.O. or his new team in Philadelphia.

I can't say it'll be much of a homecoming from Owens. As long as the Eagles win, I can sleep at night.

Today is the Tour de Fat. I've worked a tent serving beer for the last three years, but I won't be able to help out in that fashion this time around. Instead I'll make an appearance. Make the rounds. Press the flesh.

And undoubtedly repeat "I'm ok." about a thousand times throughout the day.

I guess I shouldn't complain, at least people care about my well being. And IU suppose that's better than the other way around.

Like if they didn't care at all.

Linkies:

[brittany Andrews rates] meetbrittany.com/rates.php
[cool] rblack.org
[you go girl] tpmcafe.com/vet_amputee_tammy_duckworth
[adios allen] salon.com
[say it loud, say it plowed] moderndrunkardmagazine.com

Aight, I'm out of here.

I'll tell ya what really gets me. At least what's getting me today. The nerve, the absolute nerve of these parading peacocks strutting around talking about how their going to "keep American safe" and make all of us "American's safer" if they get your vote this November.

I've been watching the news, reading the paper, surfing the web, and all anyone is talking about it: Safe.

Safe from terrorists. Safe from Al Qaeda. Safe from Islamo-fascists.

Well, fuck that. None of these bozos, and I'm talking about both the Democrats and the Republicans, can make me safe. I'm a cyclist. I ride bicycles out there with all those fucking assholes in their cars. That's what I'm afraid of: Cars.

Yeah. I'm saying it. I've been posting shit for years about all these poor bastards all over the country getting hit, getting hurt and getting killed. For no damn reason. No damn reason at all.

Then I got hit. Worst damn thing that ever happened to me. It will be eight weeks tomorrow. I'm wearing a back brace because I have two fractured vertebra. I go to physical therapy. My knees hurt all the time. I wake up in pain. I'm not happy about it. Not one little bit happy.

And then I get this phone call tonight, about twenty minutes ago. And my man Snake tells me he just got hit today.

That's right. My man got tagged.

He was coming back from a training ride and making the left turn into his driveway when a woman in a full size pickup came by and took him out from behind. He got clipped by the side mirror and side of the truck, thrown to the ground an all that.

He's going to be ok. I repeat, he's going to be ok. He's at home and nothing is broken. He's got the usual road rash and bruises on the contact points, his knees and elbows. And his left hand is in a soft cast for a while. The Doc tells him nothing is broken, but it's all swollen anyway.

God fucking damn it I am so fucking sick of this shit.

I'm in no danger of being killed by some terrorist. None of us are. We're more likely to be struck by lightning or drown in the bathtub than killed by a terrorist.

But I fear that I am absolutely in danger of being killed by an automobile someday while riding a bicycle. Who's going to save me from that?

From: Levi Subject: media wreck on biker down stories Hey Jonny! Hope all is going well. Thought I would pass on a link to a blog discussing articles we don't like to read about in the daily news...bikers down. I totally disagree with how news media sometimes sensationalizes stories about these unfortunate situations. I believe something needs to be said about a possible solution to the problem ( i.e. mandatory helmets laws, motorist education). A recent article in my local newspaper, the Kansas City Star, highlights five local fatalities before the author provides his opinion as to why crashes are occurring more frequently and even posts a link to rules for bicyclists and motorists sharing the road. We need to work on educating bicyclists and motorists and like Dan wrote the other day, don't "let the idiots win." "Seek the simple in the complex, and achieve greatness in small things." - Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Here are tonights links:

[spooky] itpro.co.uk/remember-the-forgotten-hero-who-saved-the-world
[more spooky] nuclearfiles.org/20-mishaps-maybe-caused-nuclear-war
[adios mehlman] tpmmuckraker.com
[makes you go hmmm] drunkcyclist.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=575
[yoga] luminouslotusyoga.com

I'm done. Good night.

Damn it all to hell, we're on the downslide to the weekend. Or, if you're like me, you're just on the downslide.

Hey, it's fun riding the highway to hell. I've just one regret though, I'm not pedaling my way there.

On the Thursday of Interbyke I should be holding my head and screaming at the wall up in Vegas. Instead I'm here in half form.

Half form at best. On a good day. In my dreams.

At least I'm not going out like T.O.

I got an email this week from a girl I met the day we left Idaho and drove down to Interbyke back in 2001. Hey, hi, how ya doin', ready to leave? We're kindred spirits like that. Split gas and driving duty. Worked out for everyone.

She's got a son now and he's riding his bike like a good little guy and all that. She sent me this video [update: link fixed] of number one son taking a go at a little ramp action. Dude, it's fucking great. Absolutely great. He acts just like I do and throws his bike in the bushes, stomps away, and calls his bike "stupid." If I had a dollar for every time I've done that, right?

Don't worry, fair reader, the Young Gun doesn't stay mad forever. He comes back and he sticks it in this video.

Good looking out, little guy. Keep up the good work.

Today's links:

[the ballgame] highclearing.com
[pervez musharraf on the daily show] youtube.com
[nau cycling] dana.ucc.nau.edu/~cycling
[bush butt plug] fleshbot.com/...sex-toy-of-the-week
[trails are good] wheelingheritagetrail.com
[blog] wheelingrides.blogspot.com
[land access article] imba.com/...going_big

I'll be damned if Trent Lott ain't a stupid racist fuck. "Why do Sunnis kill Shiites? How do they tell the difference? They all look the same to me." Source: thinkprogress.org.

Some emails regarding bearings. Internal, external and good old Campagnolo.

From: Subject: Hey Big Jon, Sorry to hear about your smashup, I hope you’re healing up well. Regarding your link about bottom bracket friction… way back in the 70’s a guy named John Forrester wrote a book “Effective Cycling” aimed at helping cyclists be better riders on the road, in traffic, etc. Back in the 70’s and early 80’s when Campy reigned supreme, sealed bearings were not yet found on bicycles. Campy record hubs were the gold standard, as were Campy cranks and pedals. If you took apart an old Campy Record or Super Record pedal, you’d notice they had special groves cut so dirt would get moved out of the bearing/spindle with each pedal stroke. Forrester used to promote using oil, not grease in both bottom bracket and hubs. I switched to oil on my Record hubs in about 1984. Basically you would take some 90 weight gear oil, cut it with some Chevron Blazo camp stove fuel, then inject it into the oil hole in the hub. The Blazo would thin the gear oil so you could get it into the little hole, then it would evaporate leaving the gear oil behind. When I took apart my hubs to service them after about 10 years they were perfect, clean, and rolled with far, far less friction than any sealed hub you can find today. Forrester also recommended drilling a hole in the bottom bracket and installing a little grease fitting to do the same as with the hubs. Oil vs. grease would produce the smoothest, easiest spinning crank you could imagine. I used this system for years as I toured the US. When it would rain, I’d just squirt in a little more oil and then all was well. So FSA’s new technology with ceramic bearings just might get back to the friction free bearings Forrester conjured up in the 70’s. What goes around, goes ‘round.

We can only hope. Are we all just chasing the high water mark left by Campy? I've had new their stuff both brand new out of the box and used parts I picked up from my man Nik the Dick; and that Campy is always smooth as butter. At least their higher end offerings. Some of their entry level offerings should be buried in a hole in the ground and forgotten about as soon as you finish patting the dirt down with the blade of your shovel.

But what company's lower end stuff can't I say that about?

You heard it folks, this one will fill up in the blink of an eye. I'll be missing this years edition, but I've been there for the last three. But I do hope to be able to see you fucks off at the start. This is a fun one. Oh, and you are so going to die.

From: nathan Subject: jesus camp this was linked on DC. youtube.com/watch?v=co1_9lR9EpM jonny, so, did you notice the part where they interview the head honcho jesus camp woman? she said that she wants these kids to "radically lay down their lives for the gospel as they are over in... pakistan, israel, palestine, and all those different places..." then it cuts to a little kid that says "a lot of people die for god and they aren't even afraid". is this woman suggesting that children should be prepared to die for their god like radical muslims have died for their god? is she referring to suicide bombers and the like when she talks about "they" in those predominantly muslim countries? is she suggesting that american children should be taught to express their religious devotion in the same way that those we call terrorists do? holy fucking shit. that was the most disturbing thing i've seen in a while. wow. jesuscampthemovie.com another amusing ND anecdote: devils lake, ND had a controversy some time back about their high school mascot"satan" the devil's lake satans. seems they had a morale problem with the athletic squads. archives.cnn.com/2002/...satans.no.more

Yeah, I saw that part. I think her name is Becky Fischer. I found this summary of the film over at movies2.nytimes.com:

"Extreme liberals who look at this should be quaking in their boots,” declares Pastor Becky Fischer with jovial satisfaction in the riveting documentary “Jesus Camp,” the second film by the documentary team of Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady. Ms. Fischer, an evangelical Christian, helps run Kids on Fire, a summer camp in Devils Lake, N.D., that grooms children to be soldiers in “God’s army.” A mountainous woman of indefatigable good cheer, Ms. Fischer makes no bones about her expectation that the growing evangelical movement in the United States will one day end the constitutional ban separating church and state. And as the movie explores her highly effective methods of mobilizing God’s army, that expectation seems reasonable. — Stephen Holden, The New York Times

And yes, I think they absolutely think that "american children should be taught to express their religious devotion in the same way that those we call terrorists do."

Fucking insane, ain't it? She thinks "extreme liberals" should be quaking in their boots?

I think any rational, reasonable person should be worried after witnessing that train wreck.

If there is a God, all I can say is, God held us all man, God help us all.

Did you hear this one, Philly favorite Terrell Owens has tried to kill himself? Seriously. It's worse than just playing for the Cowboys. He really does want to check out entirely.

The human in me feels bad for the old boy. The Philly in me wants to hand him more pills. Yeah, I said it. Ya'll are thinking it.

All that money and all that talent and he's still a miserable bastard like the rest of us. Go figure.

O'Grady as DC proxy in Vegas.

And I feel he's doing a fine job of it.

Feel like reading the NIE Bush just declassified? Or, how bout just the four pages he declassified?

How's that? Enough transparency for ya? What, you're wondering just what the other 90% of this fucker looks like?

What's it like to want?

Good. Just remember that one when you vote in '08.

Links:

[art] processrecess.com
[no copy gallery] kameli.net/nocopy/index.htm
[whoa] myfetishdiary.com/blog.html
[movie] rottentomatoes.com/m/boys_of_baraka
[full on bike porn] raydobbins.com

Speaking of voting, I got one for ya. Right here in Arizona we just ourselves a little voting party with the latest and greatest hurdles placed right between potential voters and the polls. This was a primary, and a lot of folks didn't bother with it. Same deal all across the country. But me and the misses did. And it was a bunch of shit.

There was an article about Arizona's new "stricter" voting laws in the NY Times on Tuesday. You can read it over here. (And that link will work thanks to the ny times link generator.)

So what's the skinny? From the Times article:

Arizona’s new rules were passed as part of Proposition 200, a referendum that denies certain state and local benefits to illegal immigrants. It got 56 percent of the vote two years ago, after Gov. Janet Napolitano, a Democrat, vetoed a Republican-backed measure passed by the Legislature. Rooted in the state’s debates over illegal immigration, the measure is the broadest in the country, requiring a driver’s license, a state photo ID or two nonphotographic forms of identification at the polls.

So far so good, right? Read on.

This was a new polling station for us, in the basement of a local church. We walked in, handed over our drivers licenses, and then were told we needed another form of ID.

Why? Well, the street address on both our licensees has changed. We moved across town to this new neighborhood (and, hence, the new polling station) a year and a half ago.

Now, for those of you who don't know, Arizona might have the longest running drivers licenses in the country. They are good forever. My license was issued in 2002 and does not expire till the year 2035. It almost goes without saying that my address will change a few times in thirty two years. Not to mention my photo won't look a damn thing like me. And if you're photo looked like mine, you'd be thankful about that.

I digress; the problem is this: In Arizona you are required to file a change of address with the Department of Motor Vehicles when you move. There is no requirement that you have to replace your license. There is no requirement that your license has to have your current address on it, only that it is on file with the DMV. You can even do it over the telephone, or online at the dmv.org website. Simple, quick, no sweat. No trip down to the DMV is necessary. Update your new address and you're done.

I phoned both the Police Department and Department of Motor Vehicles today and both assured me my current drivers license is still perfectly ok. It's legal identification in the great state of Arizona right through to 2035.

In fact, it is the preferred method of identification right through till 2035.

But not for voting. For that I need a secondary form of identification. And, less you think something like a passport would come in handy, nope, that is worth a sum total of dick. What did I use to back up my license? My automobile registration.

Yeah. You heard me. My drivers license (remember, this still legal ID under AZ law) and voter registration card were of little or no use. I needed something with some teeth. What does the state of Arizona want to see from it's citizenry when lining up to vote? Your car registration.

Because actually bothering to, say, register your car somehow shows you're on the up and up I suppose.

I was told at the polling station that if I didn't have my car registration with me, things such as my water bill would work next time.

Are you fucking kidding me? My perfectly legal state issued drivers license is insufficient, but bring a utility bill with me and I'm cool?

Not to mention, if a few people are living together, married or otherwise, their is a good chance not all of their names are going to appear on something like a utility bill. And to the best of my knowledge, one does not have to prove US Citizenship when signing up to get the water turned on at a new apartment. Hence, it proves absolutely nothing.

This is complete bullshit.

I was telling somebody once, not all that long ago, that I liked the band Hum. I was told something along the lines of oh, those guys suck. They didn't rock.

Didn't rock you say? Well, bring on youtube bitches. I found two offering, both of which suggest two things: 1) These boys did indeed "rock", and 2) I listen to music that was recorded over ten years ago.

I need a life. Please.

Anyway, check out Hum's stars and I'd like your hair long.

Today's links below:

[supposedly the new stalls were safer] newsvine.com
[as the toto turns] nyvelocity.com/content.php?id=1058
[map as art] roundonline.com/art909.shtml
[fun] surlygreetings.com
[wtf?] behindkink.com/updates/full0.php
[coconino for sale] cgi.ebay.com/Hand-made-Coconino-Cycles-frame

I actually got a phone call today to see if we had any wine left in the house. The upside is we die, the downside, well, the thought that just maybe I had drank it all by three in the afternoon. Who knows, could happen.

Worst than that could happen.

Ah, what else is new? I'm losing weight and my legs are noticeable thinner. Oh goodie, just in time for the fall fashion season. Maybe if I keep getting smaller I can squeeze into a par of those chick jeans all the kids are wearing.

As if that wasn't the gayest shit ever.

Not that there is anything wrong with that...

Happy Monday everyone. Hot damn am I ever excited to get into a new workweek.

Work?

Yeah, whatever. You know what I mean.

Today's linkies:

[just a comma] thecarpetbaggerreport.com
[the case of cory maye] reason.com/0610/fe.rb.the.shtml
[how much time you got?] eviltron.com/modules/esp/esp.html
[honda?] ventilate.ca/news_updates/smith_03.html
[broken social scene] youtube.com/watch?v=v-U7E6NifV4
[viva las vegas] newsvine.com/...vegas-water-plan

For those of us who have run a external bearing unit down south and noticed their noticeable drag, FSA may be on to something with their new offerings. I've always wondered just why in the hell not to keep running the square tapers. In fact, I switched back to them as they are smoother. And I'm not alone in that conclusion:

"Interestingly, the antiquated square taper bottom bracket typically blows the doors off any current external stuff, at least in terms of friction." From cyclingnews.com/tech/...FSA_MegaExo

If it has less drag, why is it antiquated?

Well, that's it for now.

Paolo Bettini takes the World Championship in fine style.

What else is new for a Sunday when you're not riding? Walk around in the woods and gaze at trees? Watch football?

I'll go with watch football. It's easy, it involves food and beer. And I can do it sitting down. Basically it plays to my strengths.

My only regret is that Oakland isn't playing today. For if they were, I could have a bit of fun at Big Puns and Double A Ron's expense as the Raider Nation ties to score their first touchdown of the season. But, it is not to be, and I have to wait till next week where the winless Raiders will face the winless Browns in what promises to be anything but a showcase of football talent.

Of course, now that I wrote that, some freak with spiked shoulder pads will be knocking on my door and looking to kick my ass. And soon. I had better move.

Some links for ya:

[dude gets clear] glumbert.com/media/bikechase
[point one 'o six] detnews.com
[rainer bottle cap puzzles] geocities.com/shabber_1/rainier.html
[kids these days] yumlum.com/articles/257/1/
[wtf - jesus camp] youtube.com/watch?v=co1_9lR9EpM
[wtf - boners] boners.com/grub/797106.html

Today makes six years for DC. Yep. I've been blogging, writing, complaining about my life for six fucking years on this website. Kinda makes you wonder why I don't just stick my head in a gas oven and get it over with.

Suicide aside, since we're now at six long years instead of five short ones, the world famous 5 year shirts are now on sale. Yep, I'm giving away the store.

Some old guy calls me today, I say hello, and he goes "Who is this?"

I say, "It's Jon."

He replies "Jon who?!?"

He's fired up about something, and too bad for him I hate fucking life right now. I go, "You call me and ask who this is? Are you fucking joking? Who are you looking for, buddy, if it ain't me?"

Old Guy tells me some name I've never heard, can't believe the mystery man is unavailable and asks me my phone number. Yeah. Unreal. He wants me to tell him what number he just called. I tell 'em, well, what number did you dial, Sparky?

I think I made a new friend this morning.

I hate me some Fox News as much as the next guy, and I hate to give them any juice, link 'em, mention them, anything like that. But you have got to check out (if you're a political animal - if not just wait for the Worlds tomorrow) this interview between Faux New's neo-con douchenozzle Chris Wallace and former President Bill Clinton. Rough transcript over at thinkprogress.org/clinton-interview. More detail on the main thinkprogress.org webpage

Billy, ahem, goes for the throat. As he should have.

Fox even tried to spin Clinton's not taking their shit as "Clinton gets crazed." Really. The fine folks over at ThinkProgress have some dirt on the deed here.

Today's ultrafine link offerings below:

[bin laden bye bye?] go.reuters.com
[road rage] sfgate.com
[torture] washingtonpost.com
[looks good] thesouthwillriseagain-themovie.com/trailer
[downward spiral] diets.aol.com
[american hardcore] agnosticfront.com
[upcoming event] missingsaddle.com

A guy named Adrian Stingaciu rode his bike across the country in 22 days completely self supported this summer. His route went from Tybee Island, Georgia to Laguna Beach, California. So far, so good right? Lots of people were out touring this summer.

Now run this one around in your mind a few times: No panniers, no trailer, no backpack. He carried it all in his jersey pockets and in a few small bags on the bike. Stripped down to the absolute bare essentials, the total weight of his bike & all his gear was just over thirty pounds. That's not how much stuff he had on the bike, that's the bike weight, all his gear and the clothes he was wearing right down to his sunglasses.

And he averaged 122 miles per day.

Yeah. That's what I thought. Hard core. One hundred and twenty two miles a day would be good if I had a car next to me and I was staying in hotels. To do it sleeping on the ground and wearing the same clothes everyday, well, that's a bit different.

This email was forwarded me, it is not from Mr. Stringaciu himself, but it was written by him. Does that make sense, or did I have too much coffee this morning?

From: Yuri Subject: Fwd: 22 days across america Hi everyone! This summer I did my first cross country bike tour in the US. It was solo and unsupported with minimal gear in super- ultralight fashion. Weight of everything I used or worn came to 30.3 lbs (13.8 kg). I just went thru the gear list below and figured how to drop another 5 lbs for next time. I didn't use a sleeping bag, tent, backpack, bike rack, panniers or bike trailer (obviously). This setup worked extremely well. Due to the light weight I averaged 122 miles per day without much trouble. Three things I would change for next time. I would add aero bars (blood circulation is very important for the fingers as I found out) and find a way to reduce chaffing on the bike seat (maybe lubrication or different bike shorts or both) and add a space bag for extra warmth on cold nights. I slept out in 55F with only a bivy sack and wind pants/jacket and I wouldn't want to do it again without a space bag. I still wouldn't carry a sleeping bag. Some pictures from the ride can be seen at new.photos.yahoo.com/astingaciu/... Documents Weight Phone card 0.16 oz ID 0.16 oz Health Insurance Card 0.16 oz Credit Card 0.16 oz Debit Card 0.16 oz cash (all in zip lock bag in neck wallet) 0.48 oz neck wallet 1.12 oz Special Items Maps (loose state maps) 9 pages 1.44 oz digital camera (in ziplock bag) w/batteries 7.04 oz extra camera batteries (2 AA) 1.76 oz digital camera carrying case (binocular bag) 1.12 oz journal (2 pages blank paper) 0.16 oz pen 0.16 oz knife (ultralight Swiss Army knife) 0.8 oz sunglasses 0.48 oz watch 1.76 oz Bike stuff Trek 5200 carbon fiber road race bike w/pedals and bike computer sensors 19 lbs 7.68 oz bike computer (spedometer, odometer, etc) 0.96 oz light w/new batteries (tail) 1.28 oz light w/new batteries (front) 1.28 oz lock (combination) with 6ft cable 3.68 oz Pocket Rocket pump 4.16 oz rear view mirror (helmet mounted) 0.32 oz 2 large water bottles (0.7L each) 5.76 oz 2 water bottle holders mounted to frame 3.52 oz 3 small allen wrenches (in seat pouch) 0.96 oz patch kit (in seat pouch) 0.48 oz tire levers (2) (in seat pouch) 0.48 oz tire pressure gauge (in seat pouch) 1.44 oz inner tubes (2) (in seat pouch) 7.04 oz inner tubes (3) (in stuff sack) 10.56 oz chain oil/lubricant 1oz 1.44 oz duct tape 1oz (wrapped around frame) 1oz Schrader to presta converter (on valve stem) 0.16 oz 2 rear water bottle holders behind seat 10.08 oz Clothing bike gloves (1) 2.08 oz Shimano SPD bike shoes (w/ new cleats) 2 lbs 3.36 oz lycra bike shorts (1 only) without padding 3.04 oz helmet 10.4 oz bike jersey with 3 back pockets (no sleeves) 3.84 oz long black lycra tights 5.44 oz Arm warmers 2.44 oz Balaclava hat (thin) 1.44 oz GoLite Helios rain/wind jacket (silnylon) 3.52 oz GoLite Reed rain pants (single layer GoreTex) 3.84 oz mosquito head net 0.64 oz socks (1) - short, polyester 1.12 oz Camping ground sheet - Gossamer Gear Polycryo 1.3 oz Montbell Breeze Dry-Tec Sleeping Bag Cover 6.3 oz Bozeman Mountain Works SpinPoncho LITE 6.08 oz Gossamer Gear ThinLight Insulation Pad 1.76 oz 2.4L platypus bottle (air mattress) 1.28 oz Misc. Personal chapstick w/ SPF 30 0.32 oz sunscreen SPF 30 2 oz First Aid kit (advil) in zip lock bag 1 oz dental floss 0.32 oz soap (dr. bronner's peppermint) 1.44 oz toothbrush (cut in half) 0.16 oz Thermometer 0.32 oz compass 0.8 oz P38 military issue can opener 0.16 oz nail clippers 0.48 oz lexan spoon 0.32 oz stuff sack #1 0.32 oz stuff sack #2 0.32 oz stuff sack #3 0.64 oz seat pouch 4 oz Total 30.3 lbs

He's got a journal of the ride up over here. Some more photos available over here. And another writeup of his ride over here.

Drunkcyclist.com, your one stop shopping for bicycle industry related press releases. Not really, but check this one out:

From: Ainslie Subject: Gemini Training Systems adds Missy Thompson Press Release: Gemini Training Systems adds Missy Thompson Former T-Mobile rider Missy Thompson has joined Gemini Training Systems. "Missy's experience and education makes her an exciting addition to our team. We're excited to have her on board!" says Head Coach and Owner Ainslie MacEachran. Thompson has a B.A. in integrative physiology and is currently working on her M.S. in Exercise at the University of Colorado. Missy raced at the elite national and international level for over 10 years and was a member of the US National Team and the T-Mobile Professional Women's Cycling Team. Missy has attended races including World Cups, World Championships, Pan American Championships and the Tour de France Feminine. During her years of elite competition Missy has had the opportunity to work with many of the best coaches, physiologists, nutritionists, sports psychologists, and athletes. She has gained a wealth of knowledge that she wants to share with her athletes. In addition to racing, Missy has participated in the sport of cycling as a coach, promoter, and official. To reach Missy go to www.geminitrainingsystems.com

How 'bout a little joke action?

From: joe Subject: good one While President Bush was visiting a primary school he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word "tragedy". So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a "tragedy". One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him that would be a tragedy". "No," said Bush, "that would be an accident." A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy." "I'm afraid not," explained the president. "That's what we would call a great loss." The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Bush searched the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?" Finally at the back of the room a small boy raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said: "If Air Force One carrying you and Mrs. Bush was struck by a friendly fire missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy." "Fantastic!" exclaimed Bush. "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?" "Well," said the boy, "It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be a fucking accident either".

Oh, stop. Really. My sides hurt.

Cross season approaches:

From: Mark Subject: Cyclocross practice in Tucson CROSS IS HERE!! We are having cross practice here in Tucson every Thursday night at 8pm at Himmel park. I just returned from it and it was a blast! I coughed some shit from last march! Hope all ya'll can make it.

Yo, here are the directions to Himmel Park.

Happy Friday, everyone. End of another fine week of recovery. Not much else to add really.

Fall in full effect up her in the mountains. Labor Day is a memory and so much for summer. The heat kicks on most nights, and the trees are beginning to turn. I'm really looking forward to snow.

Not really, but it was worth a shot.

Did I read this right, Paolo Savadelli is going to do the redbull road rage event?

Some links for ya:

[1,000 years] azstarnet.com/dailystar/metro/147639
[bush the torturer] washingtonpost.com
[oh god] balkin.blogspot.com
[dekerf bowing out] frameforum.net
[sswc 06 pics] web.mac.com/...SSWC06.html
[sswc report] wunnspeed.blogspot.com

Good old Tyler back in action as of today. He can race this weekend, here in the States anyway, this weekend. But will it last?

From: sean Subject: Hamilton ban Hey man, How's it goin'? So, I see on VeloNews Hamilton's 2-Year ban ends tomorrow. I give him four months before he's banned for life. Any takers?

I'll just quote Velonews on this one (link above): "He is facing a possible lifetime ban if documents found in the "Operación Puerto" dossier show proof of alleged doping practices."

Maybe they should have typed when instead of if...

An end of an era is upon us. Bensy and Snake have moved on up like their name was the Jeffersons. Yes, they sold the single wide trailer they've shared like two gay lover for the past nine years. And tonight was the "last night" party.

My man Big Pun came by and picked me up. I had to make an appearance, even if it was only a short one. I felt like I was in high school hanging out drinking in a box with no heat. Yeah Bensy saved fourteen dollars by shutting off the gas a few days prior to his big "last night" deal. It was so cold in there we had to open the fridge to warm up the place. Good times though, reliving all the past moments of glory back at the shitbox. Man, I fucking loved that trailer.

It was singlewide success all around.

Snake is back east doing the pro roady thing and he asked me on the phone earlier today to pour out a little for him. He couldn't make it out for the last hurrah. I obliged in one of Sessa old sweaters 'cause it just felt right. I mean, what else could I do?

The pictures below is some guy I saw at the bar in full Health Net splendor who told me he was Gord Fraiser.

Gord sure has softened up since he retired.

Today's fine link assortment:

[what a mess] boners.com
[bike lanes good] tucsoncitizen.com
[outcast style] yesweareontheweb.com
[fox is as fox does] bikehusla.blogspot.com
[good times] chumfm.com
[katrina klap] youtube.com

On to the emails:

From: Dan Subject: Biker Down Jonny, hated to hear about your fate and subsequent recovery. This link you posted happened just up the road from us (Ocala, FL). gainesville.com/...news Every time a biker goes down, I am just that much closer to packing in the road bike thing. But, if I do that then the idiots win. Most recently I had a conversation at a stop light with a driver that sounded something like this; "Hey, roads are for cars!" I corrected the ass with the retort; "Roads are for taxpayers!" He had to think about that.... As I road off.

I feel sometimes like I should just ride a mountain bike from now on and be done with it. But then, I've also thought about, as you put it, letting the idiots win. tough choice.

Thanks, Elliot. Good to know you're out there doing what you can.

It's also good to know 'ol Elliot's email ain't exactly for real. I thought I'd share that before I catch 100 emails with the subject line "Fuck Elliot".

Think of it as preventative maintenance.

From: Mike Subject: ten Here are the top ten reasons to support GWB: 10. I am Hamid Karzai. 9. I am Jalal Talabani. 8. I am an Israeli. 7. I am an illegal immigrant. 6. I employ illegal immigrants. 5. I work for a defense contractor. 4. I want a Hummer! 3. I hate the environment! 2. What border? 1. What constitution?

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

petra   I   jaqui   I   aubrey

Dear Lord God in Heaven, let this end. Another bike down, this time out in Beverly Hills, CA.

Big Tuesday. Nothing to do. 'Cept talk like a pirate of course.

At least I can walk into Home Depot with confidence, not like that bastard Austin. That bastard.

Have at the links:

[bush & borat] dailymail.co.uk
[vdb sighting] cyclingnews.com
[14,000] news.yahoo.com
[kristol is insane] weeklystandard.com
[oh hell] talkingpointsmemo.com
[all toto, all day] nyvelocity.com
[olbermann demands an apology from bush] youtube.com
[bush tries to intimidate lauer when questioned on torture] youtube.com

Stolen bike notice:

From: Beth Subject: I got thieved. My bike got stolen this weekend. It was locked up outside the Coffee Bean, and someone came with bolt cutters. The model was Attitude. Real dark purple/green, almost looks black. No stickers, octopus squeaky is probably long gone. The gears on the back are new and shiny, look a bit out of place. The rest is small stuff, like a chip in the paint on the top tube. I should have spray painted it pink like I was thinking of doing. Somehow I never took a good picture of it. This bike is my only transportation. I am offering a reward for its return, and any help at all will probably get you a beer. Please keep your eyes out for it. Thanks, Beth (Flag Tees)

If you are in Flagstaff, and you find out anything about this, email me and I'll pass it on to Beth.

And now an email on helmets:

From: Ralph Subject: Helmets... Yo Dude Wear your helmet. Why, because you don't know. I read Rich's email about riders w/o helmets. It appears to be true. I have seen some really bone head maneuvers by non helmeted cyclists. I've also seen some really bone headed acts by helmeted cyclists. I would say that most people who wear helmets have more of a clue of how to act on the road. I've also seen parents here in CA riding with their helmeted children, its the law, w/o wearing a helmet themselves.......very good example.... Here where I work you can tell the undergrads, no helmet, from the grad students, helmets. They have found out how much their brains are worth.... Three summers ago I was pulling out of a small dip in an undercrossing. I stood up and took a couple of pumps. Next thing I knew I was on my back with my bike on me....... Don't remember anything except thinking something is wrong and why is my pedal back there on the road?.....(it sheared off). A woman was standing over me asking if I was okay, she'd seen me fall and stopped. Helmet with two cracks in the back, I got up and walked away. With no helmet?? You just don't know, wear the helmet.

I couldn't agree more.

From: Response Subject: 3 cups OF coffee is what i need 3 cups I am on 1.5 and waking up I will be fully awake when Its time to go bike riding tonight

Amen to that.

The Eagles lost one yesterday they really should have won. Up seventeen points at the end of the third quarter, even a skeptic like me thought it was looking good for the Birds. Then things played out as it often does for a Philly sports fan; it all went pear shaped. And quickly.

The Giants ruled the fourth quarter. First it was a fumble recovery in the end zone, then a 22 yard td pass, then a stupid fucking 15 yard penalty where Philadelphia's Trent Cole kicked New York's Kareem McKenzie in the balls and the Giants were able to tie it up with an easy field goal. Why not give 'em a 35 yard look, eh Cole?

Thanks for that one buddy. Although, really, it's more than just his fault. There is plenty of blame to go around.

And Kearse got hurt. Of course. It was just a matter of time, wasn't it?

After watching the replay of his knee injury, I'd say he won't be playing any foot ball for quite some time. Like the rest of the year.

Why am I talking about football so much? Well, what else have I got?

How 'bout links? I got those:

[blog] xanga.com/...hankthespacecowboy
[2001 monkey hill cyclocross vid] youtube.com
[oh god...] ouchytheclown.com
[risk assessment] wired.com
[dickbag cheney] healingdick.com

Oh hell, read this: Bicycling fatalities have risen almost 25 percent nationwide since 2003

And we got a biker down.

From: Kyle Subject: Death during MS 150 Breakaway to the Beach What's up Big J, Hope you're doing better good sir. Just got home from the Multiple Sclerosis 150 Breakway to the Beach. Turned out to be 160 miles in 2 days with a camp out on the fire ant infested infield of the Darlington race track in S.C. Big ups to the massively intoxicated frat dudes working the event staying up late puking and drinking all the free beer. Would have been all over that free Budweiser if there weren't 84 more miles to do the next day. Got up the next morning to some bad news, someone had died for the first time in the event's 21-year history. 15-year-old girl from Charlotte was killed by a truck pulling a trailer that swerved back into the lane too soon and hit her and her family. Horrible deal considering the good nature of the event. You could have heard a pin drop when they told the some 2,400 people lined up the next morning. Prayers go out to the family. Link to the story: thestate.com/mld/thestate/business/15545523.htm They're putting up the families address on the MS Web site eventually if anyone wants to send their condolences: nationalmssociety.org/ncp/event/event_detail.asp?e=12516 Stay safe out there, Kyle

More information on Rachel Giblin over at Charlotte Observer. The link worked for me twice, then didn't. You may have to utilize bug me not on this one folks. This is the print version. Whatever works, right?

She was in ninth grade.

Bikes belong.

Vinokourov takes the Vuelta in fine style. Like we didn't see that coming. That kid is out with something to prove.

And it looks like he just proved it.

I opened my email this morning. Twenty nine new one. Twenty one were spam. Cool.

By lunch I'll have twenty more. But I'll be downtown watching the Eagles take on the Giants so what do I care?

Philadelphia Eagles on top of the NFC East at the moment. Somehow I don't see that lasting through, um, today.

Having a hell of a day over here, how 'bout you?

Links:

[shitcan iraq] washingtonpost.com
[powell in the right] time.blogs.com
[bike helmet redux] slate.com
[what the fuck?] epica-awards.org
[stephanie miller] progressive.org
[john peckham info] ncncaracing.com/forum

An email on helmets:

From: Rich Subject: drivers give helmeted cyclists less room Hey, Jonny, been pullin' for ya since the accident. Hope things continue to improve - but remember, you may never be given a better excuse for being slow than this! I thought the BBC article about helmets and passing room was interesting. As both a (daily) cyclist and occasional driver, I don't think I change the amount of passing room I give cyclists when they're wearing helmets. And I've always believed that this is why you assert your right to the road when riding - so that you're sure to have enough room to dodge if something pops out of nowhere in front of you while you're being passed by a distracted mom in a civilianized APC. If you ride like a gutter bunny and your helmet subconsciously causes drivers to crowd you, sooner or later something bad will happen. But if you make them wait for a good opportunity to pass you... well, um, I was going to say you're safer in the end, but I guess your experience indicates you eventually get run down from behind by some drunk, right? Fuck. I've noticed something similar in myself when behind the wheel: If somebody is wearing a helmet, I assume they're going to stop for the stop sign/red light/whatever. If the cyclist is not wearing a helmet - whether it's a blue-collar DUI offender reduced to cycling for basic transportation, a college student avoiding the parking morass on campus, or a hotshot local racer with all the gear - I don't assume they'll stop when they should. I have seen a real correlation between the basic protective step of helmet use and the tendency to follow the rules of the road. I figure the extra caution I use around the helmetless has saved my car's hood from a few fool-induced dents . To be fair, the helmetless racers are more likely to stop when the situation calls for it - they seem to slow down and decide whether to stop or not based on whether there's a real opening; the basic-transport types seem to just be in a hurry to get where they're going, and count on your basic human squeamishness about running 'em over. It's interesting, because if you read the Rivendell spiel on helmets, they cause "risk compensation" - taking chances you wouldn't normally take if you didn't have your helmet on. I've definitely noticed the tendency in myself, I know it's real. But sometimes it's hard to imagine how much worse your stereotypical completely-unpredictable, wrong-side-of-the-road, dart-across-three-lanes-of-traffic college student could be if they had a helmet and were "risk compensating"....

I won't lie to ya'll, I've ridden a bike without wearing a helmet more than once. More than twice even. But after that last little "event", I can honesty say I don't know if I'd be here or not if it weren't for the helmet I was wearing.

I haven't seen my helmet since the accident, but I've heard from folks that were a lot more "with it" that I was in the ER that it is in pieces. Little pieces.

I can remember feeling the lumps on the back of my head days later. And people who saw me that first day (I have only limited memory of the first 24 hours) tell me I was saying the same things over and over. Like they'd have a conversation with me, and then 10 minutes later I'd be saying the same shit all over again.

Look, I'm not one to tell people what to do, most of the time anyway. But, seriously, wear a helmet. There are real dangers out there. I was riding in the bike lane, doing everything correct, and I got hit at quarter after noon in broad daylight.

If really could happen to anyone.

Most days I feel damn lucky to still be here.

And then I feel really bad for the families that have lost someone this year.

Bikes belong.

I went out for a drive this morning. Actually it was more of a ride as I wasn't the one that was driving.

Anyway, we went out Lake Mary Road and drove loop out around Mormon Lake. Which, as it happens, is the same route as our Saturday morning group ride.

At one point we were pulled over at a rather nice scenic overlook type spot, and the group came by. I held up my coffee and waved. And I got waves back.

As we drove back, we passed the spot were I got tagged. Still no memory of where exactly it happened, or what exactly happened. I only know from other people telling me where I got hit.

Pretty damn weird.

Here is some info on the John Peckham Memorial Ride.

Today's links:

[tpm letter] talkingpointsmemo.com
[spiritual malpractice] theregister.co.u...serbian_witchdoctor
[good times] warehouse.nimbit.com/ericschwartz/ClintonBJ.mp3
[blog] 327words.blogspot.com
[tent issues] husatoday.com/...oxygen-tents
[fixies are the new black] sfgate.com
[blog] thebikegame.com
[dope talk] dailypelotonforums.com
[extreme wheelchair] break.com

Someone sent me the definition for Dirty Kate. At least its not as bad as a Dirty Kevin Costner.

That one is just plain ugly.

Today's emails:

From: M Subject: gills Vino is boosted to the gills. How much dope can you fit into a Kazak? Apparently, quite a bit. My peloton friends relate that Vino is boosted via the Russian-Kazak criminal syndicate. You bust him, you die. You think Armstrong will pay you back by getting you fired or no job possibilities in cycling? Vino's backers will cut off your head and stick you in a concrete block bound for the bottom of the Med.

This might be the third press release I've posted this week. Seems like I'm turning over a new leaf or something.

From: Epic Ride Subject: Mountain Bikers Gear up for Show Low Bluff Tour of the White Mountains; October 7th! 11th Annual Show Low Bluff Tour of the White Mountains endurance mountain bike event descends upon Pinetop-Lakeside communities! For Immediate Release: TUCSON, Arizona — (September 15, 2006) Mountain bikers from across the region are getting ready for one of Arizona’s greatest endurance mountain bike event of the year. The 11th Annual Show Low Bluff Tour of the White Mountains, kicking off on October 7, this years pre-registration numbers have already surpassed the previous 10 years attendance numbers and promises to be the biggest ever in the history of the 11 year old event. With an anticipated 400+ participant list, the roster of riders will include Mountain Bike Hall of Fame inductee Keith Bontrager. Keith is a highly acclaimed pioneer amongst the bicycle community. “Having Keith at the event” , says Todd Sadow, President of Epic Rides, Inc. “is a testament to the quality of ride the communities of Pinetop-Lakeside, AZ have supported and grown over the years". The Show Low and Pinetop-Lakeside communities located in Northeastern, AZ boast an endless system of trails composed of smooth very rideable single track, lots of tree covered double track and ample greenery. To challenge the riders, the event has five different distances to choose from. Sadow says, “there is a distance for everyone! From the 10 miles breezers and geezers category all the way to the 66-mile single track challenge. No matter what, everyone should walk away feeling great about their achievement at days end. The event starts Friday, October 6th, by bringing participants to town for packet pickup and a mandatory pre-event meeting for all riders participating in the 52 and 66-mile distances. On Saturday, the riding will commence at 7am. Later that night are the awards and Redhook Ale Barbeque located at Thunderhorse Ranch. For more information and up-to-date reports, photos and video footage check out epicrides.com. Special thanks to Tour sponsors: Show Low Bluff, Redhook Ale, Cirrus Visual Communication, Cycle Mania, Lon Hoffman Insurance and the event beneficiary Navapache Regional Medical Center.

Well, Happy Friday everyone.

We've made it through to the other side yet again. Of course, not meaning so much to me with no job and all that. Recovering is my Jay Oh Bee these days. I feel like quitting this taco stand and getting into a new gig. Wish luck with that one.

So, old Frankie spilled the beans. At least some of them. I personally don't buy the part about using EPO "only a few races", aside from the Tour of course. Didn't dope in the Tour, no sir.

Bullshit.

Once you're in, you're in all the way. You use EPO throughout the entire season, really juicing up for every race that's worth a damn. Otherwise, your performance will plummet and you'll be weaker than you were before the drugs. It's like a cop taking dirty money, a Senator elected on the promise of reform getting cozy with K Street, or me with all the porn on this page, once you go down that road, it is awfully hard to go back.

Anyway, looks like Discovery wants to consider legal action against Andreu.

I think this is a huge mistake on Discovery's part. And, by association, Armstrong. Coming out hard and fast against a former teammate who admits drug use seven years ago looks to be no more morally defensible than the Yellow Jersey chasing down a fucking nobody like Filippo Simeoni who is two hours and forty minutes down on GC because Simeoni testified against that fucking scumbag Dr. Michele Ferrari.

Why do you think that second rider in the NY Times article "spoke on condition of anonymity because he said he did not want to jeopardize his job in cycling"?

'Cause he knew Armstrong was going to throw everything at 'em.

Links out the ass:

[segway recalls all 23,500 scooters ] startribune.com
[a long one] dunwalke.com
[cbgb] villagevoice.com
[blog] waking.missingsaddle.com
[oh my god] theregister.co.uk
[bikes belong] theunion.com
[ullrich is fucked] sports.espn.go.com
[strock, kaiter settle doping suit] velonews.com
[big black - jordan, minnesota] youtube.com
[kristen lights up ann like a christmas tree] huffingtonpost.com

One email and I'm out:

From: Mike Subject: no subject Hey Jonny How friendly is friendly fire?? As a proud Canadian I support our troops in whatever hell the Canadian government decides to send them, I do not however support the George Bush World domination tour! So when I read the news that a group of Canadian troops were bombarded by 2 A-10 warthogs I was once again shocked at how, in a time of multi million dollar aircraft with state of the art guidance systems could bomb the wrong target????? They call this friendly fire because the Americans caused the death, wouldn't it make all Canadian deaths in Afghanistan"Friendly Fire" since we are there fighting the American war?? I live in a Military town where the bodies of our dead arrive fresh from Georges latest battles and am sick of people dying for his screwed up ideals!! Does everyone forget about the Lack of Russian success in Afghanistan? I just want someone to tell me why exactly we are there?? Canadian troops are a Peace-Keeping force but it seems to be more of a Piece Keeping force as we are sending our kids back in Pieces!!! Unfortunately we have put a government in power who will gladly do what Uncle George says is right. For once I wish we would act like the sovereign nation that we are instead of blindly following the "War President" to the south. Canadians are loved throughout the world for various good deeds and I am afraid if we keep following the war machine we will lose that status. How long before we start luring our poor with the chance at a free education in exchange for service in an army following the Hillbilly Oil Baron?? It pisses me off to no end when I see poor people fighting the rich mans war so they can get richer on the backs of the poor. It is time we all stand up and say ENOUGH!!! War is bullshit and no matter what reason they give, if you dig deep enough you will find its all about the mighty dollar. Canadian troops shouldn't be dying in Afghanistan, they should be back in their small towns drinking Canadian beer and doing what they do best, playing hockey. Stephen Harper is just a George Bush wannabe without the accent. I only hope we don't make the same mistake the American people made and re-elect this clown!!

Ah hell, yet another day in paradise. Went to see my orthopedics physician, or whatever I'm supposed to call him, this morning. He tells me things are healing up good. Then I told him about the pain in my knees and he performed some bizarre variation on the figure four leg lock on me and asks, "Does this hurt?"

Well, it doesn't feel good.

I guess being blown out of your cycling shoes by a car goin g fifty five miles per hour, getting ramped off the windshield like a god damn gold ball off a pitching wedge, and coming back down to earth in a broken heap isn't much good for your knees. Amazing. I never knew that.

Links coming at ya:

[fun] thejudiciary.org
[hard hitting drug article] sportsillustrated.cnn.com
[sad] news.bbc.co.uk/...5338118.stm
[wtf] news.bbc.co.uk/...4748292.stm
[drivers give helmeted cyclists less room] news.bbc.co.uk
[i loved her] profile.myspace.com
[as the toto turns] nyvelocity.com
[cold blooded] whatjeffkilled.com

Biker down.

From: Eric Subject: rider down We lost one of the good guys last night: rochesterdandc.com rnews.com Stay tuned for details: gvccracing.com interlakescycling.com

My heartfelt condolences to his friends and family.

And now, something for the ladies:

From: Jennifer Subject: PRESS RELEASE FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Women’s cycling club to hold bicycle demo day for the ladies Santa Fe, New Mexico September 6, 2006-On a crisp fall day in the near future, women in the Southwest will have a chance to see what bike companies have to offer those of the female persuasion. The Pedal Queens, a women’s cycling club in Santa Fe, N.M., will be hosting Bike-a-GoGo — a Women’s Bicycle Demo Day and Expo, on Nov. 11, 2006 at the Santa Fe Community College. The club is inviting manufacturers of women-specific products, local retailers and other women-oriented businesses in the bicycle industry to attend. Major bike companies such as Specialized and Trek have already signed on for this chance to showcase their products to dozens of women who will gather for the event. The Demo Day and Expo will feature both road and mountain bike products, as well as nutritional goods and apparel. Keeping with the fun-loving spirit of the Pedal Queens, there will also be contests, prizes, and an after-party for the ladies attending. The club hopes to draw women from Arizona,Colorado, New Mexico and Texas for the event. With 112 members ranging from complete beginners to professional racers, the Pedal Queens are quickly becoming one of the largest women’s cycling clubs in the country. The club focuses on creating a supportive, non-threatening environment for women to learn about and ride both mountain and road bikes. Known for their pink feather boas and squeals of laughter, the Pedal Queens are excited to offer Bike-A-GoGo, a Women’s Bicycle Demo Day and Expo, as an opportunity for the bike industry to show their support for one of their largest target markets — female cyclists.

Straight outta Boulder!

From: Chrisopher Subject: Hamilton This just in Tyler has missed the last few group rides in Boulder. What’s up? Dog got your tongue bra?

Ouch.

Let's change it up a little bit. Yep, back to politics.

From: Matty Subject: We're gonna kill you...the details are too complicated... BJ, What's up with this shit about our country wanting to execute people without allowing them to see the evidence brought against them? Is our government truly worried about these people seeing classified information that implicates them? How exactly will these poor souls "get the word out" about all the dirt our intelligence agencies have on their friends when they are likely still in a dark cell somewhere being exposed to further "coercive" interrogation. It's not that I have deep-seated sympathy for truly guilty terrorists, but for God's sake I'd like to see our country be some sort of role model. We used to be one, right? Keep clean and decent.

I think the concern regarding classified information that someone will be able to view things, and the manner in which they were obtained, in a trial in which the defendant is found not guilty and released. At that point they could, I suppose, share that information. Of course, in the present case, these poor fucks haven't had anything resembling a speedy trail, so even if a few of them are integrated back into whatever communities they came from, it'd be years after the fact. Hard to imagine whatever they "learned" in their trail could be of much use then.

And, that example competently assumes (as does the term "terrorist tribunal") that the defendant is guilty (of at least something) and associated with some of those unsavory terrorist types that he (or she) could provide the classified information in question to upon release from what I'll call the American Gulags. It totally marginalizes the very real concern that there are innocent people being held in Gitmo and god knows whatever other CIA hellholes the current Administration has created. If a man has been wrongly imprisoned and cannot gain access to an attorney, has no right to a fair trail, be able to review the charges against him, or face his accusers, he's just fucked isn't he?

If these are bad people, well then, deal with them as we've dealt with "bad people" for years. Put them on trial and convict them of their crimes. Hiding them around the world for the past four of five years isn't quite sporting, is it? That's just not cricket.

Those are not the standards this country holds herself to. The bar has been set high. And it was set high by brave men and women who have fought and died for this county. They deserve better than that.

And we deserve better than that.

Another entry in the "events I'll miss this year" category is the Kona/IMBA Buck-a-Bowl Fundraiser scheduled for Thursday, Sept. 28, at the Orleans Casino in fabulous Las Vegas. I've spend way more money on my bar tab in previous years that it took to buy the damn lane. It is a very fun evening's entertainment and money well spent.

And I'm talking about the trail advocacy and the beer.

Kona has decided to keep my traditional lane assignment (#69 of course) darkened during the evenings festivities. The lane is to be auctioned off with all proceeds going to IMBA.

Yeah, it's a good thing. Here is the press release complete with a fine pic of me in the hospital. So start throwing money at it, ya bums. Click here to purchase tix online.

In other fine news, Tom Danielson bags a big one taking stage 17 in the Vuelta a España. Good looking out, kid. We've been waiting.

Could this be the beginning of something for young Tom? Could be, could be.

In other news, I again was at physical therapy for a good long time today. Another day in paradise for the big man. And, you wouldn't believe how hard it is to balance on a skinny little foam strip thing (think six inch round cut in half, three feet long, maybe three inches high at the center) and then throw a soft, squishy three pound ball against a small trampoline that's propped up against the wall. Looks real easy, like some dumb bar trick. Then you try it a few times and realize it will take your undivided attention to actually catch the damn thing when it comes rocketing back at you and not fall off the foam strip.

Oh, good time indeed.

Today's stupid links:

[armstrong issues statement regarding andreu claims] velonews.com
[bruyneel statement on andreu confession] eurosport.com
[andreu interviewed on npr] npr.org
[bicyclist awaiting ambulance hit again] boston.com
[gorilla biscuits show review] twowheeledlocust.com/gorilla_biscuit
[air force chief: test weapons on testy u.s. mobs] cnn.com
[good luck with that beard, buddy] cnn.com

A quick note, if you need a host or server space, look no further than the fine folks at Doreo. They've been treating me right for years. I'm sure they'll treat you right as well.

Good night.

After the multi-media blitz that was the five year anniversary of the 9/11 attacks I've got two things. First, on the day of the attacks, I learned what are enemies can do. Second, I'm learning how people in this country react to terror and how politicians take advantage of that reaction.

I can't say I'm glad for any of these insights.

Anyone else wondering who the "other rider" who admitted using EPO while on US Postal in that NY Times article was? (up in the DC forum)

I'm going with Jonathon Vaughters. Remember the LA Times story back in July? I've got it up in the DC forum too if you want to read it.

I could be wrong, but I think Andreu and Vaughters are joined at the hip on this one.

Today's links:

[andreu issues statement] velonews.com
[you can't trust anything anymore] nymag.com
[this november] talkingpointsmemo.com
[more tpm] talkingpointsmemo.comp
[richard clarke chimes in] tpmcafe.com
[prentice steffen flashback] velonews.com
[wow] msnbc.msn.com
[fire. rumsfeld. now.] washingtonmonthly.com

Another event missed this fall by the big man. The 2006 Kona Global 24 Hour Series #2 was this past weekend. I went up last year and had a great time. A very fun event and one I would whole heartedly recommend you try. Anyway, couldn't make it this year for obvious reasons and the boys gave it some stick without me.

You can read David L'Heureux's (of Bicycling fame) write up over here. And my man Sean's report is below:

From: Sean Subject: 24-hour race report Yo Big Jonny, So, we raced the 24-Hour race last weekend as Team ‘Big Jonny’s Media Darlings’, and we killed it. The team was me, Ferrentino, Dave L’Heureux from Bicycling and Dan Monaco from Dirt Rag. Of course, none of those guys wanted anything to do with the Lemans start, so I did the run. So, imagine how surprised I was to come back at 59 minutes, in the front of the field and putting us in first place in the Sport category. Basically, and despite our best efforts to slow ourselves down with drink and smokeables, we held the lead for the entire race. In the end, we all decided it wouldn’t be right for a team with a Kona rider and a BIKE Magazine rider to win, so we sent Ferrentino out on a Cross bike (hoping to get DQed) and then I pulled a 2 hour final lap, which included a 15 minute nap on the side of the course and stopping at the final corner to have a few beers with my teammates. Man, we threw that race with style. I had to leave before the awards ceremony, but I heard the second place team (who eventually won) thanked us for throwing the race with a two hour final lap. Booyah. So, all in all, I raced 84 miles over the course of 24 hours, on about an hour and a half of sleep and 40 GU packets, give or take. I still have the shits. They should put warnings on those things, man. Anyway, thought you’d get a kick out of it. Also, I liked the inspirational quote Mark Matson put on my handlebars. Good for a laugh mid-lap at 3am.

I thought about what to write today as everything, everywhere is just crawling with thoughtful phrases, colorful language, inspirational words, heartbreaking stories and the like. For example, Bush's speech tonight. Ah, no, that wasn't all that impressive from where I'm standing.

Fight the terrorists on the streets of Baghdad or face them on the streets of our cities?

Come fucking on, man? Are you trying to be funny? 'Cause I ain't laughing.

It's five yeas since that bitch ass sucker punch and I got nothing. What does one write about something like that anyway?

How about I just say nothing that happened that day destroyed our way of life, our country, our heart, or soul, or anything else. America is still here. And it sure didn't make anything better for anyone in this world. Over here, or over there. Its all fucked up now.

Terrorists. Can't stand 'em. Good looking out, you bunch of dicks. Chalk that one up as a success. And thanks for keeping Bush in office.

It's hard to decide who sucks more: Bin Laden or Bush.

Maybe Cheney sucks more?

Whatever. Bottom line: Tearing things down is easy. Building things up, now that's what's hard.

Ok, on to the other big news of the day, Landis and Andreu.

Landis is over, man. Over. What a bunch of desperate whining horse shit he's spewing. In my hometown of all places. He's suggesting its the French lab who tested his blood who are up to no good. And not, ahem, him. Yeah, it's all about the French and some chip they have on their shoulder. One of the two samples that were tested isn't actually his or something. He said "there are too many contradictions for the two to be the same sample..."

Yeah, and they both came back positive. So, lemme get this straight, your point is that you didn't technically fail both the A and B samples because one isn't actually yours? Nice. Smooth like butter, man. Don't even try to address the fact that if one of those two dirty samples still is yours, you had drugs in your body.

In other inspiring news, Frankie Andreu admits using EPO in 1999 when riding for US Postal. Since that link is to the NY Times and some folks may not be able to read it, I'll post the whole damn thing over in the forum. Why? Because everyone needs to read that.

I've only got one question: Is this the beginning of the end for Lance?

The quick links:

[biker down] forums.roadbikereview.com
[olbermann on 9/11] youtube.com
[same with transcript] crooksandliars.com
[cup stacking] youtube.com
[big oil] theagitator.com/archives/027024.php#027024
[damn] theagitator.com/archives/027031.php#027031

The upside for today is I now have the Embrace album to listen to. And listen I have.

Man, I must be getting old or some shit. I'm listening to stuff from twenty years ago and, I don't mind telling you, getting excited about it.

The Eagles took home an opening game win yesterday. And tonight Big Pun's Raiders got blanked at home for the first time since the Bronco's treated 'em the trash that they are back in 1981.

The Philadelphia Eagles start their season today against the Houston Texans. It's a quarter after ten in the morning here in Arizona, and the birds are already down seven zip in the first quarter.

Such is the story of my life.

Link dump:

[info] newsvine.com
[the real] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009705.php
[oh jeez] tpmcafe.com/social_security_to_be_phased_out_in_2007
[dickhead cheney one] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009712.php
[dickhead cheney two] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009714.php
[dickhead cheney three] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009716.php

I don't know anything besides I'll be watching a lot of football today. Hey, I can't ride a bike, I gotta do something.

Here is a little something someone put together from the Arizona State Championship Road Race. And, if you're interested, the race was out on Lake Mary Road, where I took my last bike ride. Yep, this is the road I got hit on.

I just got tagged a bit closer to town than these pics. But you get the idea what it looks like where I did get tagged: Wide open with a wide shoulder.

Kinda makes you wonder what that shithead who hit me was doing, 'cause he sure as shit wasn't fucking paying attention or looking through his god damn windshield like most people do when their driving a car.

Can you tell I'm bitter?

Another weekend and another chance to hang out with the fam. Of course, all I ever do is hang out. For I am a burden on society like my name was Big Gay Randy

Linkies:

[oh no] thepittsburghchannel.com
[hero] cyclingnews.com/...results/vuelta
[oh hell] guardian.co.uk
[iraq sucks vid] youtube.com
[shitbag] answerbag.com

Bush has acknowledged the oft rumored secret CIA prisons. Great news, eh? People held god knows where for god knows how long without any rights whatsoever. Oh, we're so far from any memory of moral high ground is makes your head spin just thinking about it. We've become the Soviets.

This email pretty much lays it all out in a clear concise manner. I mean, what do I have to add to this:

From: Ang Subject: Terrorists Hi. Don't forget to update the site with the following: 1. Bush/Cheney speak of "terrorists" or "unlawful combatants" - never soldiers or prisoners of war. 2. However, this is referred to as a "war on terror" - if it is a "war," then are we not obligated to follow the rules of war. 3. The rules of war bring us to the Geneva Conventions: genevaconventions.org 4. And it all started with this article: cnn.com/...bush.speech

Here is an email that got lost in the pile. It's from back on the 2nd. Anyway, check it out:

From: Mike Subject: hey Big J, Up here in Salt Lake Fukkin City we had a little anti fukkin Bush protest for the day Bush came in to speak. Four thousand people came. This is a lunch time, work day crowd. Think of that. Salt Fukkin Lake City pulls in 4000 souls to protest that idiot who happens to be our President. I went, the protest was led by our Mayor. God bless his soul. He called Bush what he is; a lying, deceitful war-mongering, corrupt immoral and borderline treasonous man. The people cheered mightily. Oh yeah, the "Pro War" Rally. It netted 300. In the reddest of the red states, in the state with the highest approval for used smega Bush, the people have spoken. Bush and the Republicans are cooked. Warm up the fat lady, she will need to belt out a tune soon.

Seems you're in a slightly larger liberal island than I am at the moment. Big red sea between us, but damn if I care. Bush is over. Long live Bush.

Ask, and ye shall receive. My man Chris pointed me at these Embrace vids on YouTube. And then, of course, you have Broken Social Scene and The Streets and Death Cab for Cutie and Hum and Minor Threat and Bad Brains to check out as well. YouTube may prove to be this wrecked cyclist's lifeline to happiness.

And here is another Bad Brains link just because its so totally fucking badass.

A whole lotta links for a Friday below:

[gord gord gord] cyclingnews.com/interviews/...gord_fraser
[huh?] geocities.com/verdrahciretop/invisibike.html
[the other shoe dropping] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009653.php
[noah takes a photo of himself everyday for 6 years] youtube.com
[damn squirrel] news.ninemsn.com.au
[mitch hedberg vid] youtube.com/watch?
[from fox?] foxnews.com/story/0,2933,212081,00.html
[bike site] wolfhound cycles

Big M and Jackass came to town a few days ago to see their beat up buddy big jonny. We made it down to a coffee shop one fine morning, my first time since the accident. Anything to get out of the house.

M and I had each bought a slice of zucchini bread and were sitting outside eating. One of us said to the other something about this being some good zucchini bread. Just the usual bullshit about the weather and hippies suck.

We're chatting along like a couple of six grade girls, and I mention, oh, Big Pun had recently baked up some mean zucchini cake himself. Who knew that cat could bake? This bread we're eating had raisons and so did Puns. And, I add, Pun also included something I had not seen in zucchini bread before, pineapple.

Big M stops eating and says, "Pineapple? Are you fucking kidding me? Who puts pineapple in zucchini bread?"

"Pun does." I said, "And it was good too."

"Yeah, right. Pun doesn't know what he's doing if he put pineapple in zucchini bread"

Within a few moments, as if on cue, Gnome rolls up on us while we're talking all this shit. He and Pun are roommates, and it was zucchini out of Gnome's garden that Pun had used. Who knew that cat could garden?

M asks Gnome is he still had any zucchini left. He goes, "Are you serious? I got more than I can use. Come by and take as much as you'd like."

Big M looks at me and I know what she's thinking. Not only is she disparaging Big Pun's baking skills, she's set to prove the point by baking a superior zucchini bread. Since I'll be benefiting in two ways, namely, entertainment and free bread, I'm all for it.

M and I roll over to Gnome's spot, and she's working over his garden, selecting nothing but the finest specimens for her project. Pun is there and I tell him what's what. He's like fuck that, let her try and best me.

Ladies and gentlemen: The game is afoot.

Back at my place, Big M has all kinds of stuff out on the counter, flour, eggs, bowls, you name it. Jackass and I are having the time of our lives. "You sure you don't want to use the Crisco? Nothing says loving like Crisco."

She is 100% not down with Crisco.

Anyway, she's on the phone trying to reach god knows which one of her many relatives in two or three states (she's from a family of six kids) and she doesn't exactly have her much talked about recipe memorized. And no one is answering her calls. Jackass and I are, or course, having the time of our lives. "Why not call Pun. He's got a great recipe! He'd be happy to share it. Go on, give him a call. Here, I'll dial him right now and tell him you want to borrow his recipe."

She is not appreciative of our suggestions.

We leave her to her work and go hang out on the back porch. Throw bocce balls around and bust each other balls for a bit. She comes out. The bread is in the oven and she's nervous. There was no famous family recipe to follow, she tells us, so she used one for carrot cake out of my wife's Better Crocker Cookbook. She sub'd out zucchini for carrots, used sliced almonds (what I had in the cabinet) instead of walnuts and totally winged it on the spices.

Oh, she's nervous all right. I've already invited Pun over to check out what she comes up with under the guise of a bbq. In fact, I've called him a few times with status reports.

45 minutes later and Big M's zucchini surprise is out of the oven. I get the first taste (I'm a cripple, charity move) and it's really good. I mean really, really good. I tell her and she smiles.

Jackass is going big and slathering butter and cream cheese on alternating slices. Pun tries a piece. We're all impressed. Big M is relived and maybe even a bit humbled.

No, she's not humbled at all. I'm just fucking with ya. Her? Humbled? Not this day. She loves this shit. As she told me one time in her own words, "I'm not a bitch. This is just the way I am." And god bless her for it.

It should be no surprise that Jackass and I eat the whole damn tray in record time. It should also be no surprise that we ask, rather nicely I might add, for M to make up another batch the next morning.

So there you have it, a little story about my competitive friends and how much zucchini bread we can eat in one weekend. It doesn't seem to matter if we're on bikes, throwing bocce balls around, drinking beer or baking, it's all about who can do it better, longer and with more style.

As it should be, right?

I can truly say I don't give a fuck about your money, because it means so much to you. And all of your money…

I just got an Embrace mp3 from a friend. And just one. That's it. One. To my name. I do, however, have the entire self titled 1985 album on vinyl. Not that my computer can do much with vinyl. For that I need a good old fashioned turn table. And mine is not exactly working at the moment. And all I can think about is getting my turn table working. I need a new needle and some cables and god knows what else. And a way to and from whatever store sells what I need in this stupid redneck mountain town as I ain't supposed to drive.

Maybe I should just buy a whole new setup and be done with it. I mean, why not? Just snap my fingers and blammo, there it is. Or here it is. Or you get the idea.

I'm sitting here and all I can think about is honey baked ham.

Today's links:

[old school] dischord.com/bands/embrace
[olbermann and colbert] youtube.com/watch?
[race report from nationals] toddherriott.com/...outer-limits-on-sunday
[blog] lincolnbiking.blogspot.com
[bikes belong] kitsapsun.com

In that last link, there is a part that is stuck in my mind. It reads "The suspect (cyclist) then began threatening to assault the driver and spit in his face, reports said. The truck driver grabbed a metal pipe and hit the suspect once in an effort to get the man away from him."

Trucker almost kills cyclist with truck. Cyclist catches trucker at red light. Cyclist yells at, threatens and spits on, or at, trucker. Trucker answers by striking cyclist with a metal pipe he just happened to have laying around.

Does anyone else see a problem with this?

This ones a bit late, but better late than never I suppose.

From: Chris Subject: Press Release - Chris King - 9/1/2006 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Chris King Announces 2006 Pretty & Strong Special Edition Series Special Edition Program Supporting Susan G Komen Foundation Enters Third Year Portland, OR, September 1, 2006- Chris King Precision Components will expand its Pretty & Strong program from a limited edition series to a special edition series with year-round availability of components beginning September 1, 2006. The program will continue its support of breast cancer research awareness with a portion of the proceeds from each sale of related products donated to the Susan G Komen Breast Cancer Foundation. First offered in 2004, the program featured the company's acclaimed sealed bearing bicycle headsets and hubs in a unique pink anodized finish. In 2005, the program expanded to include headset spacers, stemcaps, and t-shirts. Response to the 2005 program resulted in a donation of over $10,000 to the Oregon and Southwest Washington Affiliate of the Komen Foundation. Consumer interest well after the 2005 dates of availability and retailer feedback have led the company to extend availability year-round beginning in September. "Demand for these components is not limited to just a few months per year," said Jeff Menand, Sales Supervisor for Chris King Precision Components. "Even more so, there are people wanting to make a connection to this cause throughout the year. We recognize that commitment and have given pink an enduring position in our product assortment." "Chris King Precision Components is a great supporter of the Komen Foundation, and a tremendous advocate for early detection of breast cancer," said Christine McDonald, Executive Director of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation's Oregon and Southwest Washington Affiliate. "It is organizations like this that make a remarkable difference in our community and the fight against breast cancer." About Chris King Precision Components Chris King Precision Components is widely recognized as a leading manufacturer of precision bicycle components and is located in Portland, Oregon, often noted as North America's best city for bicycling. The company provides sales and service support to over 3000 authorized dealers throughout the United States and to distributors in 24 countries worldwide. Chris King is an official supplier to the Discovery Channel Pro Cycling Team and supports numerous regional and national bicycle programs. The company will be celebrating its 30th anniversary in 2006. For more information about Chris King Precision Components, visit: chrisking.com

Ah Christ, Wednesday? The famed "hump day"? We're halfway through the workweek already? Sure doesn't feel like it to me. But then again, I ain't working so much these days.

Go figure.

We all do what we can in this world, folks. And me? I'm right in there with 'em. In spirit. Rah rah, go team and all that. I'll be right here in this chair trying to get comfortable.

Someone asked me recently, so jonny, what are you doing with yourself these days?

I said, mostly I try to get comfortable.

Comfortable? What I mean by that is I try to find a way to stand, sit, lay down, whatever, in a way that doesn't hurt all the damn time. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But I'm always trying.

Hey, we all gotta have something that gets us out of bed in the morning. For me, it's pain pills.

Fuck this shit.

I'm also pimpin' DC gear like it ain't no thing. I've just recently got into another batch of the infamous DC beer koozies.

You need one of these babies. They keep beer cold. What more could you possibly ask for?

Links:

[dumbass] townhall.com/columnists/...KevinMcCullough
[goodbye constitution] youtube.com
[9/11 report] slate.com
[site] moabworld.com
[olbermann on o'reilly] youtube.com

Yeah, whatever and all that. Thanks for reading.

A very good holiday weekend for the big man. Friends in town from Tucson. Bocce ball tournaments out back. Lots of food. Even did a fair bit of walking about. And, this was a new one for me, I got to watch other people get drunk.

That was weird.

Then you have the realization that the Drunk Cyclist ain't doing much of either at the moment. I tried to tell that hardass at physical therapy that I was a bit lost, that I was no longer engaging in either of my two favorite things in the whole world: Riding bikes and drinking beer.

She looked at me, her face made of stone and said, "Ten more."

I also like it when I come in today, first day back in the gym and she asks me, "Do anything stupid this weekend?"

A couple of links for ya before I take a nap:

[get busy] dezekerweter.mine.nu/bicycle_stunts.htm
[olbermann lays it down] youtube.com
[wire tap shakedown] youtube.com
[bikes belong] dirtragmag.com
[tucson dispatch] tucsonweekly.com

And and an email for ya:

From: Tim Subject: More links Hi! Last week you had a link to a site called Elvis Kennedy.com and an article called "Floyd Flunks". Thanks, it was very entertaining. There's a couple more articles at that website that I'm sure Drunkcyclist readers will enjoy; elviskennedy.com/...FloydsStory Which is a fictional piece about the night before Floyd's Stage 17 ride and describes what might have happened in the discussion between Floyd and his advisors. elviskennedy.com/...Landisandwater Which debunks one of Floyd's Doctors, Allen Lim, and his claim that is was water, not drugs that led to Floyd's amazing race. And best of all is this one; elviskennedy.com/...Pee Which describes the best method for peeing while riding a bike. Funny stuff. I thought that you and your readers might enjoy these. Thanks.

Ok, nap time.

Wiser men have said it before, and I'm not above saying it again. Why not beat it into the damn ground?

Weekends don't mean quite as much when you're not working. 'Cept, of course, you get to hang out with your working friends.

And, in my case, eat lots of bbq. God damn if I don't love me some pork. I'm 100% down with the "other white meat".

Today's fine link assortment:

[dick cheney] rotten.com/library/bio/usa/dick-cheney
[bike new orleans] nytimes.com
[quicksand] youtube.com
[treadmill time] fugufish.org
[fucked up in a couple ways] aish.com/movies/PhotoFraud.asp

I read in the paper this morning where Senator Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania "reflected the renewed Republican message that the Bush administration's aggressive policies abroad have kept Americans safe from terrorist attacks at home. "The reason we haven't" had any terrorist attacks since Sept. 11, he argued, "is because we've taken it to them where they are."

My man is forgetting a few thing here. Prior to 9/11 we had homegrown terrorist attacks such as Oklahoma City and the good time brought to us by Eric Rudolf. These bastards killed a lot of people, and we're certainly not going to address the issue of some other citizen going off the deep end and killing his (or her) fellow Americans by dropping bombs in the Middle East.

The reason we've prevented another event like those mentioned above is through good, old fashioned thorough Police work. That in and of itself ought to be enough to silence those who point fingers and say "fighting terrorism is best handled as a military action, not law enforcement."

Yeah, read this too.

And I'm out.

Back to the weekend grind when friends come over and actually make my life more exciting. I may even get driven somewhere like the grocery store or coffee shop today. The opportunity for a change of scenery and some fresh faces is not one to miss.

Here's a picture of Snake at the National Time Trial Championship. Check out the DC sweatband in full flight.

Too bad there was a mix up and he missed his start time by two minutes. How'd that happen you ask? Well, I'm not really sure other than a team mate of his thought he was going off at 10:06, and Snake thought he was at 10:22. The teammate went down to the start, and sprinted back to tell Snake he was fucked.

I'm sure he's really happy about it and if he was here he'd just as soon belt me as say "hi".

Today's links:

[ride blog] ridingthespine.com
[fun] overheardinnewyork.com
[oh dear god] babycage.net/index.php
[right on] postgazette.com/pg/06244/718081-192.stm
[llama] albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php
[bush] talkingpointsmemo.com/archives/009618.php
[fun] foobies.com

Well, that's it for now. I'm going to eat a lot of food and try to gain a few pounds.

Hey, everyone needs a goal, right?

How 'bout that Bush speech yesterday in Salt Lake City. What a guy. I think I've got a handle on his plan regarding Iraq. Stay the course, change nothing, do exactly what we've been doing until the next election and let the next poor bastard elected president figure out how to end it.

I'm waiting for someone, Republican, Democrat, anyone, to step up and say we need to change up our whole commitment. And I mean step up and give it everything. No more of this half assed shit where we don't have enough bodies on the ground and we don't get them the equipment they need. Someone who says, hey, from where I'm standing we need to institute a draft, get a half a million new troops in uniform, throw a shit ton of money in the mix and spend ten years in Iraq to make that sure we end up with a functioning country that can stand on its own two feet.

Otherwise we're just twiddling in the wind and waiting for someone else, either Republican or Democrat, to get elected and reduce the already insufficient troop level and end this trainwreck. Staying the course means nothing more than continuing to half ass the whole thing.

Any bets that no one will say that? Sure, it'd be political suicide come this November. But it sure would be nice to hear someone put their neck out and take a hawkish stance that's beyond what Bush Co. wants to commit to. It'd knock them off on their own little game.

Because that's what this all is right, a game?

Time for a few emails:

From: Overman Subject: (no subject) Jonny, It doesn't surprise me that Rove's minions are trying to define the opposition's position on terrorism for them, or that the Democrats are letting them get away with it. They make it out to be a choice between doing things their way and buying Bin Laden a lap dance. I came up with an analogy to explain the liberal take on terrorism and foreign policy relative to the current administration's. Think about it like a football game. Coach Bush has been doing nothing but run the ball since the kickoff, and the terrorists have a very strong run defense. Liberals are not saying we should quit playing, just that maybe we should pass instead. For example, their utter refusal to even talk to Syria for the last five years because they are a "terrorist state" has done us no good at all. What kind of relations do we expect to have if we call countries names and refuse to talk to them. It doesn't matter if they are a terrorist state, we have to take a pragmatic view of this. Not talking to them may make us feel good about taking a stand against state sponsors of terrorism, but does nothing to reduce the problem. As far as being "unpatriotic" for criticizing the actions of this administration, that one really pisses me off. America is a product its people. In a way, we are its parents. It is continually being reborn as the country changes. If you find out that your child is on meth and you yell at them does it mean that you hate them? It just means that you care and you know they can do better. That is why people criticize this administration - because they see the damage that is being done to our country and we know we can do better. What kind of country do we want to have? cheers, Jason

Word.

Next!

From: shane Subject: (no subject) Whats up Jonny. Motherfuckin immobility aye, it's a hard road bro. I spent 3 months not walking after being taken out by a car on my motorbike back in the days, and about another 6 before I had anything that even slightly resembled power back in my leg. That shit will fuck with your head. Being forced to sit around day in day out after riding your ass off. Would be safe to say that I was ah, volatile. But time heals bro. Coming out of something that could have just as easily killed you makes you appreciate the little things, cuts away some of the bullshit. As I'm sure you're aware. Your kids still got a dad, your wife a husband. Hang in there man, you'll be riding again in no time.

Yo, there is a real trend with this and some other emails of late. I was telling a buddy of mine that what fucks with your head is when you've been building up for something and then the rug gets pulled out from underneath you. For me, in this instance, it was Leadville.

I'm up to doing four and six hour rides a few times a week, getting out there and riding my ass off. Just outside all the time, maybe one day off the bike each week. Hundreds of miles rolling under your tires. Pac Man style. A mile eater.

And then - pow. Suddenly you ain't doing shit.

And, man, does that ever mess you up. Your so used to being out there, the sun on your back, the view always changing, feeling the wind on your face. And now you just watch shit through the window instead.

Getting past that ain't easy.

Links:

[incoherent bush] crooksandliars.com
[cool] bikefurniture.com
[blog] blacklane.blogspot.com
[blog] blog.myspace.com/zekesbiken
[repeat link but cool] bikecarmovie.com/teaser.html
[fun] comedycentral.com/shows/the_daily_show

Today was a good day, all things considered. I went to go see the new Disney flick about Vince Papale called Invincible this morning with none other than Dirty Kate. Yep, she's in town for a while. She also took me over to my physical therapy after I bought her lunch. It's like we're dating for Christ's sake.

I was rocking an Eagles hat in true Philly Sports Fan fashion. Maybe not the best movie ever made, but it made my day. And when I slapped Kates leg at the point in the movie when Papale made the roster, she looked at me and said, "You're totally gay."

I think I love that woman.