I woke up this morning and wanted to ride bikes. To be fair, I wake up every morning and want to ride bikes, but today was one of those special days where you have super powers and you can ride way longer/harder than you’re built to. Nutrition and hydration, pacing, plans, training, blah blah blah, none of that shit matters on days like today. You ever have those days when you plan to ride 20 miles but you ride 3 or 4 times that? Them’s good I tell ya.
Here’s the whip:
Bought it from my buddy Rocky Kaufman, it’s Hebrew for Big Dick. Yup. Kona Rove, few years old. Teenage turtle green, came bone stock (with camo bartape), not bad, but also not completely my jam. Hey speaking of jam, what’s the difference between jelly and jam? Whoever answers that in the comments gets a prize. Jackass. Anyways, it sat in the garage for a few months until I started throwing old parts on it. Then I bought some nice parts for it, like those i9 hoops, #thafuck? Dirty calls it “Gucci shit on a Double Wide.” I takes what I can get. It’s like the offspring from a drunken night to forget between a cross bike and a mountain bike. Whatever.
So today’s plan was to go up and over the Lemmon. Didn’t really go over due to lots of snow, running out of daylight, etc…mostly because I’m a pussy, but a good ride nonetheless. I wore some sneakers, baggies and a t-shirt (all Club Ride…those guys kick ass and you should give them your money). Packed some beers and potato chips. Sat on roadie’s wheels, they even sat on mine at times…they didn’t know what the fuck was going on. Neither did I. Good times, here are some pictures.
Today was a good day.by
Jelly is made from juice, jam gets it all: insects, stones, flesh & bones!
I cant jelly my dick down your throat..or can I.gettin vulgar on a friday ha
You can’t jelly your cock down your girlfriends throat..
I can’t jelly my dick in your butt.
you can’t kick out the jellies mother fucker
Jam is when you stew the fruit first and add the sugar directly to the hot stewed fruit. So the whole fruit pulp is in the final product.
Jelly is when you stew the fruit first and then strain out the fruit pulp and then add the sugar to strained liquor. You asked you got
I can’t jelly my dick into this watermelon
Difference isn’t important. I can rub either on my dick when I’m lonely.
I can’t jelly my dick in your mom’s ass
You’re jelly my dick has its own jam
It’s gotta be jelly cause jam don’t shake like that!
I went for a ride today, here’s the video:
You can jam a dick up an ass but you can’t jelly it.