Something to do other than vomit when you’re watching Lance Armstrong talk to Oprah: BingoStrong

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This might come in handy when ‘ol Lance Armstrong himself sits down with Oprah Winfrey and handles his business with a couple of softball questions. You can play bingo. BingoStrong. High five later.

Click for full res version of BingoStrong. Print out and party like it’s 1999.

Look, it’s either this or a drinking game where you do a shot every time Lance says “cancer.”  There is a good chance trying something like that would kill you.

So, bingo it is!

I’m sure they’ll be other games, including those that punish your liver, coming out over the next week or so. How ’bout this, whoever hits bingo first has to drink a six pack? Happy now?

Good thing this is to air on a Thursday. Work production is going so suffer on Friday.

Update: Now with rules. See image below.

BingoStrong game rules, a handy guide for making your game pieces, and a grand prize
BingoStrong game rules, a handy guide for making your game pieces, and a grand prize
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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

21 Replies to “Something to do other than vomit when you’re watching Lance Armstrong talk to Oprah: BingoStrong”

  1. So I have a legit quandary that no one seems to be addressing.

    Let’s just suspend reality/belief/hope/blind faith for a second and assume he doped coerced a few others along the way. All good so far.

    At what point does anyone start to go wait, he did this, all on his own? Slid it all under Trek etc’s noses and they had absolutely no idea anything was going on.

    I’m sorry, I’m calling BS. It wasn’t he, alone. It was Trek in all their money hungry, power/market share grabbing glory. You just don’t have an entire pro cycling team juiced, without some higher ups knowing whats going on.

    I’d go so far as to say they were behind the programs inception, funded it, paid for the best possible docs and chemists to achieve the best possible “ahead of the technology curve” results, but perhaps I’m a bit jaded, so I’d accept tacit approval at a minimum.

    It sucks to have all these guys go down, ruin their personal lives, careers, what have you, while the likely prime instigators walk away totally devoid of blame, selling yellow skin suits, Alien helmets and Madones like they were selling water to people lost in the desert……

    Am I alone here?

  2. Mr. CycleSmith speaks sense. As I had suggested on previous occasions, it seems clear that the sanctioning bodies and the anti-doping agencies seem to have been suspiciously easily duped… Don’t ask, don’t tell.

  3. criminal, corrupt, capitalist corporations corrupt everything they touch. The puppetmasters never pay for their crimes. Only the puppets.

    But don’t lose too much sleep over the rider’s fates. They were all well paid stooges.

    Enjoy the schadenfreude. Burn a Trek.

  4. I was assured last evening at the US Postal Service meeting regarding the USPS financial duress. “That cutting back the post office hours in my locale would save way more money than financing a pro cycling team on dope”

  5. I’m still hoping the boy never admits anything, we all know he did it, i just think it will be that much sadder for the whole thing if he sings. Would Castanza admit he doped? No NEVER!!
    Come on think about it, he must take this to the grave. By the way i heard Gary fischer was gonna admit to doping too. And trek is bringing back lemond AND Klien!

  6. I’m not sure that Trek would have known. Suspected, maybe, but they’re just an equipment provider/sponsor; Trek was in no way involved in the day-to-day running of the team. Neither was Motorola, or the Discovery TV network.

    Now the team – Stapleton, Bruyneel, and the rest – yeah, they knew. Provided, aided, and assisted, yeah.

    When is the first time that Lance doped? Because in ’91 he rode for the US National amateur team…. if he was doping there, it’s a pretty sad commentary of the state of USA Cycling…..

  7. And don’t forget all the $$ Nike, his other major sponsor threw his way. How many doped/disgraced athlete’s have they “sponsored” then suddenly distance themselves from when sh*t hit the fan?

    NOT a Lance fanbot but lot’s of people were players in this one.

  8. I’ll be laughing while I ride my ’04 Team Festina edition Specialized M4 tomorrow.

    …then watch me get a double flat and lose my crank arm.

  9. …(again) obviously only lance knows what’s coming but the term “…confession…”, if indeed he’s going to confess, means little in & of itself…

    …the guy has been playing public relations games for so long i wonder if he’s capable of meaningful contrition or if this about to be just another twisted form of self aggrandization…

    …lance armstrong…maniacally obssessive or lunatic fringe sociopath ???…

  10. @ BGW both MO & LFS , only reason he would consider coping at this point is his inability to stay out of the spot light to start with. LA just can’t bear to not be able to compete in triathlon’s (as a pro) I would imagine they couldn’t stop him as an amateur.

  11. …”other than vomit”…? Yes, Oprah’s fat ass usually works as an emetic.

  12. Q: Lance. You have been accused of taking performance enhancing drugs and never tested positive, what do you say to your accusers?

    A: I will not come in your mouth. Again, I mean. This time I will tell you first, I promise.
    Really. I beat cancer.

    Q: That’s gratifying. It must be very hard for you to say.

    A: Just let me put the tip in.

    …Jesus, Fuck. Of course the guy is incapable of “contrition.” He’s a psychopath. I really hope he holds to the denial.

    Ride that pony, Lance. Ride it.

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