And Now Introducing….

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Hello, doods.  I’m announcing the beginning of a new area, or era, or __arrhea on the site here.  It is my promise to you– with my centuries of experience in shops, dealing with confused customers, drug-addled coworkers, cheating whores for a boss, and fishing with grandpa– that I can answer your questions.  I’m starting and advice and Q/A column here on the DC. 

Your quandries may include, but are not limited to:

  • questions relating to any of the two aspects of bicycle repair.
  • questions relating to dealing with cock shop jocks
  • advice on how to get along with nobody
  • etcetera

I’ll look forward to hearing from you, and as an uninspired-to-write-on-the-site-about-my-own-experiences sort of dude, we here at the DC have decided that this is really the best way for me to stay involved from here moving forward into the next fiscal quarter which I’m sure you aren’t surprised to hear is going to be gigantic.  Was that a secret, Jonny?

Anyways – write me here:  greasewipe (at) drunkcyclist DOT com (spambot proof, so please cut & paste), and expect this wad of brainduke to be slapping the blades of your computer’s cooling fan next Saturday.  If this gains any momentum, it’s surely to be because it’s filled with hydrogen.  Godspeed.

Wipe on,

Snakehawk

About Snake Hawk

good, bad, funny, sad, stupid, rad, has, had. non-joining funhaver from coast to coast(er brake). buster of the chops, drawer of the logos. North Carolina, USA

114 Replies to “And Now Introducing….”

  1. “Your Mom is a worthless whore.”

    yep, i woulda agreed with ya until about age 32 or so. things are much better now.

  2. My name is John. I am an addict.

    My demon of choice is beer. I’ve used it to drive away everyone in my life.

    I used to drink the good stuff. Pete’s Wicked Ale comes to immediate mind. But the last 10 years, I’ve switched to the cheap shit. Coors Lite. Not as tasty but less of pain in the AM.

    For whatever foibles or peccadilloes I may have, I can proudly say I am not an asshole. Or should I say I’m not dolak. A new word has emerged.

    I believe that most people are decent. I believe that most people are clean.

    I wish I could say the same about me.

    Merry Christmas people.

  3. Holy shit, people. Let. This. Thread. Die.

    My nom de plume is el jefe. I drink too much beer. (therefore?) My life is great. Life is too short to drink cheap beer (all the time).

    I have family and friends who love me. I get along with my co-workers. I can proudly say that I am not an asshole. Even though dolak appears to be an asshole, I’d share a ride and a beer with him. I believe that most people are decent, even if they are misguided.

    Now shut the fuck up and go for a ride.

  4. I agree with eljefe

    To borrow from Monty Python, (okay, plagiarize),

    This thread has passed on! This thread is no more! It has ceased to be! It has expired and gone to meet ‘its maker! It’s a stiff! Bereft of life, it rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed it to the perch it’d be pushing up the daisies! ‘Its metabolic processes are now history it’s off the twig! It’s kicked the bucket, It’s shuffled off its mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleeding’ choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-THREAD.

    And I say this as a broken shell of a man who was already a broken shell of the man who he was before, have limped back from the Round Lake Taupo ride where gale force winds & a torn knee cartilage caused him to pull the plug at 80 kms & to slink onto one of the relay buses trying to hide his soloist number from the rest of the occupants, in vain, ‘Weak, Weak, Weak’ went the chorus, (mental note, snot rocket every relay rider I come across next year).

    But Full credit to TripleF for bringing a new phrase to the site, first we had “Lighten up Francis”, followed by “I like Turtles” & now we have “Don’t be a Dolak!!”

  6. …your quite right, summers eve, i did err…

    …i wrote that at 5:37am, left coast time after working several nights of 13 to 14 hours & then coming home in a bit of a daze, only to realize that your pathological tediousness was still being posted…

    …it should have read & i quote – “………& maybe your ability to bore people to abject ambivalence”{…

    …& if you wanna pretend you don’t understand that, don’t reply, just think about it…

    …& then rinse again…

  9. Pingback: War Bikes - Drunkcyclist.com | Drunkcyclist.com

  11. Keep telling them the truth, Dolak. They may protest, they may scream bloody murder but it is the right way.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHJbSvidohg

    Trungpa said “Sometimes they are offended. They might cry and kick and even shoot a
    jet of diarrhea right in our face, but they are still somewhat feeble
    and sweet. In spite of their kicking and screaming, we place them in
    the cradle of loving-kindness. We take pride in such persons and
    regard them as would-be warriors, in spite of all their bad temper. We
    are not put off.”