Bad news for Boonen

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Granted we have yet to talk about what is going on at The Vuelta here at DC, but this story popped up over at CyclingNews, and I figured it deserved a posting.

“Because of the friction of the pants with the saddle, I suffer from an injury to the scrotum. The extreme heat and excessive sweating caused a heavy irritation in that area. There is a hole. It is not the first time that I have suffered in this place, but never as bad as now. “

Read full story here

If there were ever a reason to cut a season short, a hole in the sac is one of them.

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About 40 Hands

A fan of riding bikes with one gear, malt liquor, riding without knowing how many miles I’ve covered, and strip clubs that let you bring your own keg. I typically have a stupid grin on my face, it is because deep down I know that no matter what, my mom thinks I’m cool. Denver, Colorado, USA

32 Replies to “Bad news for Boonen”

  1. Get some D’Znuts cham cream or have your 17 year old GF go more than balls deep with a little cocaine on her tonge for the rim job !

  2. boonen’s shit luck continues…. it was just a few years back and he was bulletproof, now the guy can’t get break.

  3. To prevent saddle sores….try wiping down the nether regions with rubbing alcohol on a cloth or paper towel IMMEDIATELY after each ride.

  4. I like Boonen and always root for the big dope i the classics,but my God man can you leave a bit more to the imagination?

    The injury is “a bit better now, Boonen said, and explained what he has done. “I got a ‘second skin’, and glued it at times to a kind of diaper. The perineum, the area between the scrotum and the anus, is simply the most delicate part of the body.”

    ??? Oh no…

  5. yikes.

    I’m wearin’ 2 pairs of shorts on my commute home after reading about that…

    ouchies

  6. …now that tom ‘cocaine cowboy’ boonen can’t get away with luring the young girls in with the white powder, he thinks “hot talk” like ‘…the area between the scrotum and the anus, is simply the most delicate part of the body…’ is gonna work…

    …insufferable bastard…

  7. It’s a real risk focusing on the spring classics. You set your position on the bike not thinking about the wet Belgian April shrinkage factor. Couple days in hot Spanish bag sag weather, and next thing you know you’ve got a nut hole. All the boys who spent spring in San Sebastian are doing just fine.

  8. bgw, it really sounds like he left you bitter…like he didn’t want to hold you afterwards…

  9. to get rid of my SAM the Saddle Sore, i used suggestions from the comments here on DC. besides using HooHa Ride Glide, which also has healing properties, you guys recommended clearasil wipes after every ride. and changing out of your chammys after every ride RIGHT AWAY. i also cut off half my saddle for a couple months. infected areas that come back to the same place over and over again could also be MRSA. nasty shit. I didn’t have any problems this year doing Mohican. i credit the HooHa ride glide though. men can use it too, dominic loves it.

  10. Why not ride a saddle with a cutout and then put a small moleskin ring around the nutsack hole that allows a relief of pressure to the perineum area?

    I can’t help but think that Quick Schlep has it in for that guy or at the very least has no credible medical oversight of the condition of their riders. Take for instance the Tour where they let the poor dude ride with a concussion that was so bad he couldn’t talk and ride in a straight line. It was only after Fabian went to the Quick Schlep Team Car 3 times, telling them that Boonen was a danger to himself and others that they took him out of the race.
    I seriously doubt a team like Garmin would have allowed him to start that day (just using them as an example, not a paragon).

    The dude should not be riding right now. His nutsack hole could become a serious health issue with long term consequences.

    I mean it’s funny but it’s really funny (but it’s kinda funny).

  11. …yoro…there’s really no other way to say it…

    …you are most consistently a lame cunt…

  12. Did you guys see that video clip of Tommy D. after the TdF stage where he crashed? Head injuries are scary shit— he keeps asking, “Did I finish? Why did I crash?” Radio Shack pulled him.

  13. …i see ‘kep’s pollen balls’ are finally being advertised here on drunkcyclist…

    …what an opportune time !!!…

  14. @Me— I saw the video on the US Vuleta coverage of yesterday’s S12, they interviewed Tommy. I can’t find the video clip on YouTube, though I see that the kid stayed on his bike, and as we all know, finished the Tour ninth. In his interview, he said he couldn’t remember the stage of the crash but felt better the next day. Dayum, that’s working for a living.

  15. PS— laugh all you want, but I’m out to ride, going for a hilly 35 miler today. Keep the rubber side down, brothers.

  16. …mikey, enjoy the miles & while i don’t really wanna rewatch the horner thingy, that WAS scary shit…

    …guy gets up, obviously physically banged up & finishes the stage & then we find out what the crash really did to him…

    …on top of that, fuck, it was chris horner, man…so many of us wanted to see the man defy the odds & take his rightful place on the podium…

  17. Well, if the hole in the sac didnt’ finish him off, how about a scaphoid fracture. His hole in the sac will be a walk in the park if that bone starts to undergo avascular necrosis and he needs a graft taken from his iliac crest- the donor site surgery hurts worse than the actual recipient site in the scaphoid!