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Morning round up:

Fu Yo stumbles… Come on Fu Yu!

Fu Yu loses his red jersey to Tonton after Stage Four
Fu Yu, who has worn the red jersey since winning Stage One, failed to keep up with the leading peloton and was placed 12th with a time of 4’11:08.

Read more: thestar.com.my

Tucson’s off the hook.

Sheriff’s deputies were called to investigate a potential suicide after a woman reported that a man of her acquaintance, who had earlier been making suicidal threats, was talking to her on the phone and then hung up following a loud bang. Upon arrival, law enforcement discovered that no suicide had occurred–the subject had simply been remodeling his home, and what sounded like a gunshot had probably been a hammer or a nail gun.

Willingly interviewed, the subject verified that he had called his ex-girlfriend’s partner, whose number he knew by heart, and had left a message in a screaming voice threatening the current boyfriend’s life

…The subject could not remember his exact words, but when asked if he may have said something to the effect of, “I will rip your head off and shit down your throat,” the subject replied, “That sounds a lot like me, and, yes, I probably made that statement.”

Big time crazys down there. I mean, really.

A man with an apparent intolerance of homosexuality tried to run over his girlfriend’s gay neighbor with his vehicle, according to a PCSD report.

The victim reported that he had been hanging Christmas lights outside his trailer when he heard loud arguing coming from the suspect’s girlfriend’s trailer next door. When the victim complained about the noise, he reported, the suspect came out of the residence and started “going crazy,” threatening to get his 300-pound friend to come over and “kick his ass.” The suspect began to ridicule the victim’s homosexuality, calling him a “faggot” and “homo.” The suspect then got in his car, saying, “I’m going to run your fucking ass over.” He began driving erratically, doing donuts in the street and trying to hit the victim with his car.

The victim’s story was corroborated by his roommate, who had apparently also been involved in the argument and is also gay.

Read more: www.tucsonweekly.com

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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

4 Replies to “What?”

  1. “The victim’s story was corroborated by his roommate, who had apparently also been involved in the argument and is also gay.”

    Was it really necessary to indicate that his roommate is also gay? Homophobic story editor me thinks.

  2. …tough day…

    …lost the red jersey, had his head ripped off & somebody shat down the hole & then he finds out his room-mate is gay…(insert disclaimer)…”not that there is anything wrong w/ that”…

    …good luck tomorrow, dude…