i hit the swerves today for 2.5 hours, or in euro time, 10 kilodays.  it was a small group, just a camera and a kona and a dickwad you’ve come to know as shankhock. i treasured every single kineto-slide, barkwipe, jog-ram, slab-blaster, lever-chint, and sparkle whip.  there were about 30 of each.  it was grandeur, [...]

i’m not doping.  i’m trying to fit in here again.  i’m probably the smartest person on the whole site here, but i just haven’t chimed in lately to say anything about it because i’ve been too busy racking up impossibly high percent results in classes such as Math 140 and English 112.  then i got [...]

allow me to get heavy. as my ride home from work last night involved partial chaos, i counted both blessings and pedal strokes.  i had thunderclouds assembled off of my starboard shoulder, just right there within reach.  if i were zeuss or some high-standing cosmic fucker like him, i’d have just pushed the cloud system [...]

I didn’t have a whole lot of time, but I had a whole lot of reason, a whole lot of want, and a whole lot of bike.  (41 unloaded pounds of bike, to be exact.) For years, I’ve been allowing the distance between “the well” and me to grow.  I’ve been watering it, excusing it, [...]

i know you’re all reluctant bottoms just looking for that special someone who will let you finally give the back rub. well lay back down, jerks.  Jens is in town, and if you could just release your vicey grip pinchey hold from andy & berto’s uniceps for one second, you’d see that there is a [...]

while judi and domenic were hussying about the pool zone, snakehawk went a-biking.  i went for two rides this past holiday weekend, which is pretty fucking rare, and my riding form was nothing short of loser.  in the end, i won, and the bomber of tecate crept towards my star-spangled liver like so many whimpering [...]

went “home” this past weekend.  “home” is indiana, where pops lives.  it was wedding time, and snakehawk’s daddy‘s, as it were.  it’s never too late to call it love. this is what the cycling turf of my youth looks like.  on days when the wind from michigan was keeping the state from going anywhere, i’d [...]

This just went down in Carrboro, NC.  The whole side of a bike shop just got taken care of.  PROPPA. Happy Memorial weekend, DC’ers.

words such as “is snakehawk ever going to sack up and reclaim glory once more?” food for thought.

today at work i came across this bike.  hey pat, i’d like to solve the puzzle, please. apparently the factory is still wrestling with the brutal western spelling of schwinn, so to ask them to understand the silent “e” will just take a little more time.  Quality control issues that challenging make me think, “fuck [...]

One time i witnessed big kitchen racing, foaming at the mouth like a shitty science project. bleeding from the eyes. the hair on the back of his hands had turned green. his kitchen sink was clunking down the trail behind him, like a car bumper hanging on by a brake light wire. mothers covered their [...]

do what you can, when you can.  yesterday i had a smidgeon of time so i used it to jam in a little trailtime, hawk-style.  dual rigid, never frigid. now you jam econo. i’d highly recommend texting and riding.  happy dark lord’s day.