Former New Life Church pastor Ted Haggard, who resigned in disgrace after a dubious relationship with a meth-dealing gay hooker, is at it again. This time, he’s begging for money to keep him and the family in bacon and beans while he “ministers” to the downtrodden and attends college in Phoenix.
According to the Gazette, Haggard [...]

Comes the news from The Old Gray Lady that some of NASA’s space cowboys have gone from the right stuff to the good stuff, which is to say that they’ve been getting good and hammered before slipping the surly bonds of Earth. Are you shittin’ me? You want me to sit on top of a [...]

After uncorking the time trial of his life on Saturday to retain the yellow jersey going into the first of three tough stages in the Pyrenees, Rabobank’s Michael Rasmussen was once again asked about allegations that in 2002 he had attempted to trick a friend into delivering him a package of hemoglobin-based oxygen carrier made [...]

Ho, ho. Michael “Chicken” Rasmussen as much as called Denis Menchov a pussy after today’s stage of Le Tour. Quacks Big Bird, as quoted by VeloNews:
“I am very happy with today. Now there is no doubt about who is the captain of this team is. I felt very clear in the head today seeing the [...]

Rob a 7-Eleven, you go to jail. Better you should lie to the authorities and obstruct the investigation into the 2003 leak of a CIA operative’s identity. But if Dick Cheney doesn’t have your back, fuck it, rob the 7-Eleven, slam a couple of 40s and think about what kind of Bic-pen tattoo you want [...]

And the geeks are lining up to buy them as if Jenna Jameson had offered to autograph their dicks for them. Using lipstick. The lipstick on her lips. At $500 for the low-end model and $600 for the full-zoot version, I recommend you spend an equivalent amount on quality tequila and pretend you have one [...]

Hee haw. I’m with m’boy Big Jonny on the Bike Snob. Loved this bit about Ultegra and its new glitzy big-hair lip-synch’n cousin, Ultegra SL:
Nextly, the thing I always liked about Ultegra is that it’s the blue-collar group. It’s always been the cheapest legitimate racing gruppo. Good enough to take the start at a Pro/1/2 [...]

The latest from the You Can’t Legislate Away Human Stupidity Department, courtesy of Bicycle Retailer & Industry News:
The New Jersey bicycle business may be in serious trouble unless retailers and suppliers take immediate action. State legislators earlier this week approved a bill banning the sale of all bikes equipped with current quick release wheels and [...]

Space shuttle Atlantis blasted off today for the first shuttle mission of 2007. There is no truth to the rumor that Paris Hilton, Alberto Gonzales, Ivan Basso, George W. Bush, Vladimir Putin, everyone who ever appeared on “Survivor,” “Dancing With the Stars” or “American Idol,” the editorial board of The Washington Post, Ann Coulter, Michael [...]

I was three years younger than Paris Hilton is now when I got thrown in the Denver City-County Jail drunk tank in 1977 because a buddy of mine got lippy with a salty Colfax copper during my going-away party (I had just graduated college and was moving to Vermont, so a few of us thought [...]