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weebl and bob
wm3

 

doreo hosting

 
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
angel dark   I   masha   I   viky   I   friends

Yo, where'd that Fist land?  The Fist landed at Kona.

I guess I should mention that whole suicide bomber going after Cheney thing in Afghanistan. It's pretty tough when someone tries to nail the Vice President of the United States and I can understand why they tried.  Of course they did. He'd be the biggest thing those assclowns have ever done. And why they'll keep on trying to get him and anyone else they can.  Forever.

[cheney ok] news.yahoo.com/...afghan_explosion_6
[primarily symbolic] whoisioz.blogspot.com/2007/02/life-of-mind.html
[she's insane] crooksandliars.com
[how'd the know?] talkingpointsmemo.com

It just pisses me off to no end. It's all part of that stupid self fulfilling prophecy Bush Co. keeps chanting about "fight 'em over there" and that bullshit line about this being the "great ideological struggle of the 21st century."

Yeah, if that's true institute the draft and raise taxes.  And lets fight this thing like we mean it.

Otherwise stop jerking me off.

Link dump:

[blogness] leavethefanon.blogspot.com
[when did walking become so dangerous?] newwest.net
[wtf is beef wire?] badgas.co.uk/griffnut/beef_wire.jpg
[who'da thunk it] news.yahoo.com/mexico_central_american_migrants
[shirts] goodstorm.com/stores/jdesigns
[cool] richardsachs.com/whatsnew.html
[not cool] talkingpointsmemo.com
[latest from bike mag] drunkcyclist.com/forum
[latest from swobo] howtoavoidthebummerlife.com

Aight. I'm out.


 

Tuesday, February 27, 2007
catalina cruz   I   erica campbell   I   victoria   I   kira eggers

The snow comes. The snow goes. Like sands through the hourglass, these are the days of our lives. Something something niner.

Did I ever tell you folks the one about Husky and the Big Horn Sheep and Papago Park? No? Good.

So way back when, when Husky and I were single, rode bikes, and weighed about a hundred pounds less apiece, we used to ride out by Papago Park in the mornings before work. We lived in this shitty tri-plex at Fifth and Roosevelt in Tempe. We always had beer in the fridge, a living room full of bikes, in short: Life was good.

So we're rocking and rolling around one fine spring day, and Husky looks over at me and says, "Dude. You didn't tell me there was Big Horn sheep in Arizona."

I look at him. He's looking at me. We're pedaling along the canal.

I say, "I don't there are any Big Horn sheep in Arizona. Maybe up in the mountains somewhere..."

"Come on Jonny! What are those right there?"

He's pointing at some Big Horn sheep standing on a rock not more than a hundred yards from us. There is a rather large chain link fence between the sheep, rocks, and ourselves. I look at him. I look at the sheep. I look back at him. "Husky. That's the zoo."

"Oh. Never mind."

Link dump:

[upcoming event] trianglemtb.com
[hope greer] flgnews.com
[oh for fucks sake] youtube.com
[even more toto] nyvelocity.com
[to protect and serve] oregonlive.com
[i'm scared] pornclownposse.com

Today's emails:

  From: nate
Subject: fixie followup
I couldn't find footage of a no-brake powerslide. so, here's the results of a short effort:

bmx freewheel with a front brake:
youtube.com/watch?v=oF1

must be coaster brakes:
youtube.com/watch?v=7Dw5BAZJuqk

best robot chicken bit ever, probably.
youtube.com/watch?v=v35nP9kt0zU

The kid in the first vid isn't running a front brake. Or any brake for most of that. I think I saw a brake cable round about 1:22. In the second vid, I think it kid is using a free coaster, or a coaster brake with the guts torn out. Guys do that so when you back pedal a quarter turn, it disengages and you can roll backwards without having to pedal at all.

I'm not sure if that's all the two same kids, Steven Hamilton and Karl Poynter, in all that footage.  They are sick.  Poynter's got more talent in his pinky than I have in my entire body. And that type of shit is just want I was talking about yesterday. Those two short vids are way more exciting than the last three or four full length downhill vids I've endured. Once you can barspin and land fakie, it just opens up all kinds of probabilities. Unless, of course, you like watching people skid down hills for an hour or so.

And while you're at it, don't miss Darth Vadar being a smartass.

  From: Industry Source #2
Subject: Fixies
Industry Source #2 here. I don't care who has what sort of brakes on their bike... But for the sake of argument, a track bike with a drivetrain brake (as in a fixed gear) has the same stopping power as any coaster brake bike on the market. Yet no one is railing against those for some reason.

If you (not you in particular, but the collective) wish to use handbrakes on your bike, that is fine. I don't care. Mouthing off about how incredibly unsafe it is to ride fixed without them just makes one look foolish however. Anecdotes of "Dude, my friend didn't have brake and he got run over" prove nothing and convince no one, especially if you consider the same logic could be applied to the vast numbers of folks who are seriously injured riding bicycles with working handbrakes from running into inanimate objects. I guess it was the brakes, and their extra momemtum... that must have caused the accident, right? How many novice stories are there of grabbing a handful of front brake and eating shit? Clearly, the malfunctioning front brake was the problem, not the lack of riding experience.

It's a foolish argument with no answer. Yes, plenty of people who have no business being on a track bike on the open streets are getting busted up, but plenty of people on bike-path hybrids also manage to smash their face as well. There are bigger battles to wage.

I might be wrong on this one, but I'm thinking a coaster brake has at least some modulation. Ok, I'm full of shit. Coaster brakes suck it.

One more on the subject:

  From: Jess
Subject: fixed gear hatred
So here is what I am going to say; fuck all the fags that think since college students and others are riding fixies, they are idiots. I forgot you all started on fixies and you own the fucking right to them. It reminds me of people calling bands sellouts that got popular because others could say they liked them now. Here are some reasons people ride fixies;

* usually cheaper to retro fit an old road frame than it is to purchase a new bike
* cheaper to repair than a geared bike
* funny to watch someone try to steal one
* all you really need to carry is a 15mm wrench, patch kit, batteries for you lights, pump or CO2, and chain lube.
* easy to lock up.

Now about the fact that people wear "messenger" bags such as chrome, timbuktu, and so on and so forth, why do you wear them? Let us look at some possible reasons;

* comfort i.e; unlike a back pack which has the potential to hit you in the back of the head when you are riding in the drops
* hold tons of shit and can keep it all organized
* most of them are somewhat water proof
* they look good
* the shoulder strap for most people is really comfortable.

And now onto the "brake" issue. Here I am slightly twisted. I think that a great deal of people are hopping on the band wagon against brakeless just because of one idiot in their community. I ride brakeless and (knock on wood) have had no incident. Did I mention I ride in California traffic. I learned how to ride without one because my originally fixie did not have the proper spacing for brakes on a 700 wheel. I did not want to waste any more time or money in potentially fucking up a good set of brakes and have them not even work right. So I learned before most other people how to stop without one, either skip stopping, skid stopping, or forced back pedaling. Yes most people should have a brake, even I should, but just like the seat belt law, look at it this way, brakes and laws interfere with the evolution of man. They both prevent the weaker and dumber people such as myself from being wiped out so the rest of you brilliant pompous asses can transform this planet into a boring, no injury, no pain, everything is better on Prozac world. Peace out and remember if you see me rolling buy on my fixie give me a wide berth I have no brakes on my bike and if you pop off, no brakes on my ulock or fist. Ass monkeys!!!

 


 

Monday, February 26, 2007
shay laren   I   charlie laine   I   nikki benz   I   lissa

Right outta the box, my man Jan Ullrich is hanging it up. For real. He's packing it in. O'Grady's got it over here in a Monday Bonus Rant. More at cyclingnews as well.

He claimers he never cheated. I don't know about that. Define "cheating" I guess.  He'll have his day in court and we'll see where the chips fall.

I'll say this much: He didn't cheat any more or any less than the likes of Lance Armstrong. I know that as much as I know the sun will come up tomorrow.

I think I'm going to play the lottery this week.  If I hit it big and fine myself sittin on top of an enormous pile of money, I'll find a chick that can speak German, buy a couple of plane tickets and make Ullrich and offer:  Race for me you assclown.

Good thing money is the international language.

I've got some more gear on sale over at dcgear.net for your shopping pleasure. Buy or die.

Another interview in my collection. This time I got Patrick O'Grady to answer a few questions.

Link dump:

[blogness] exit17.net
[rugburns the klown] pornclownposse.com/bios...
[fix me up] eehouse.org/fixin/index.php
[good times] joebageant.com/joe/2007/02/escape_from_ame.html
[blogness] whoisioz.blogspot.com/2007/02/get-off-my-lawn.html
[clusterfuck nation] jameshowardkunstler.typepad.com
[what would george bush do] boingboing.net

Today's emails:

  From: Steve
Subject: [no subject]
I just checked your site, and it would appear that you and I are very much on the same wave length.
This isn't the first time we've posted similarly themed ideas, mind you. Just goes to show, were both real fucking smart. howtoavoidthebummerlife.com

I got several on the subject. Read on dear reader.

  From: Corey the Courier
Subject: Track skids
I know you're pissed about the whole "you ain't cool unless you are riding brakeless fixed" phenomena, but there are jokers doing sideways skids on track bikes. I've seen it. The envelope has been pushed by messengers (deliberate pun) with too much time on their hands between deliveries.

I still reserve the right to silence them when I get to your level of fury up by asking: Do you ride fixed off-road? The new next level has been set.

Corey the Courier
The Man from Big Scrapple

Just ask my man Big Gay Randy about that one.

  From: Teamfubar
Subject: Riding with no brakes
Jonny,
I have to tell you about a terrible thing that happened as a result of riding with no brakes.

When I was in 7th or 8th ('84 or '85) grade there was a gathering at the junior high for one of those Up With People type of propaganda shows. After the show, my friend and I were picked up from his mother and we went to dinner. On the way out the door, we saw Jim Voorhees, the older brother of Marc Voorhees, one of our classmates, sitting on his Schwinn Predator BMX bike. It had no brakes. I asked him casually why, not wanting to look like a "safety" geek, and he said "Those brakes were shit, I took 'em off." "How do you stop?" I ask. "I just put my foot on the back tire."

About a 1/2 hour later, while finishing up our dinner, we see all the cop cars in the little town we live in go ripping by with their lights and sirens blaring. We leave and on our way home, we see a huge puddle of blood on the street at an intersection, cop and ambulance lights flashing all over and a motorhome parked to the side. Holy shit we think, what the hell happened?

The next day at school we found out that while Jim was riding his bike home, he went to cross the street and didn't see the motorhome. He tried to stop, wasn't able to and ran into the side of the motorhome falling underneath the rear wheels, which ran almost directly over his head. It was a very somber day/week/month at school and it had a big effect on those of us that were friends with Marc.

Over 20 years later I am still convinced that a brake would have saved his life. So, while I am into riding all sorts of bikes (we have 9 bikes in our garage for 2 adults) and not wanting to sound like a pansy, a brake is hardcore.

You can't argue with that.

  From: The Latin J
Subject: ...gimme a brake - please!
Jonny;
...my two fucking cents here - If you're one of these numb-nut bike-messenger wannabes who just got your fixie and bitchin' new Chrome messenger bag to be just like all the other tattooed, goateed, PBR swilling douchebags - for the love of high holy fuck put a goddamned brake on the thing before you finally succeed in killing someone other than yourself, whom of course no one gives a fuck about...I can't count the number of times I've nearly been taken out by one of these clueless fucksticks as they come blasting down the bike path at speeds they have no business attempting - if you've been riding over twenty years and actually have raced on the track (and have the scars to prove it, - nothing like hitting the boards in a points race to teach ya a lesson) then maybe you have the skills and the good common sense to slowly spin on the flats for some January/February base miles...other than that I, like you, wouldn't think of actually riding in traffic without a brake...in the meantime I give every idiot I see on a fixie a very wide berth....

I give 'em some room to. Most of them are a danger to themselves and others.

  From: LT
Subject: fixed gears
Dude- I echo your thoughts on riding a fixed gear with a brake.... hell, I use a front and rear. I've had too many cars and riders pull out in front of me.... you can't stop in a hurry if you need to with out a brake(s).... at least not in Atlanta traffic.

From Arizona to A-Town: Same deal.

  From: Jason
Subject: BMX kids
Dude,
I started mountain biking about 5 years ago. Freeriding but 99% of the time I ride to wherever I play so I guess I ride XC too. Before the mountain biking I was a hardcore BMXer. Riding BMX bikes goes way back to my earliest memories as a kid. Then I was introduced to freestyle BMX about 24 years ago and that's when I became obsessed.

I lived in Sedona at the time and there were mountain bikers around, not even close to as many as there are today, but they were there. And I got shit from those guys constantly for riding "a little kids bike" and how they thought it was soooo stupid and how mountain biking was so much more difficult in many ways and on and on. I thought this criticism was ridiculous considering most of these guys couldn't even bunny hop a goddamn curb! Even with their feet attached to the pedals!! What the fuck man?!!!

Later on I moved to Flag to go to school and some of the mountain bikers up here criticized me in the exact same way. Now, I know I couldn't keep up with them as far as speed and distance, or out on the trails because of the way my bike was built (and my physical condition) but most of them couldn't keep up with the BMXers for 100 feet in specific areas around town. Amazing physical condition but no technical skills, not like what us BMXer guys thought of as technical. So I'm really glad you put up the post comparing the skill needed to control a fixed gear road bike to the skill needed to control a modern BMX bike set up. Kind of letting people know whats up with the skill required to be a good BMXer today (the powerslide ain't much, but it's a start). It puts a smile on my face to read see some hardcore road/mountain biker stand up for the BMX dudes.
Thanks man,
Jason

I've got nothing but respect for the BMX folks. I've caught a lot of shit from some of them before (go figure), but I've got a lot of friends in that crowd as well. And the stuff they pull is hands down the most balls out insane shit out there. Period.

Check out my man Heath at Woodward.  In a drunkcyclist shirt no less.

Heath rocks it.

I've seen kids bar spin some insane gaps, to concrete, wearing jeans and a ball cap backwards, and land fakie.  It's fucking off the hook.

I've not yet seen a downhill type rig with enough brake cable to barspin, and the forks usually get in the way too.  Those guy clear some impressive distance at equally impressive speed.  It's just too much like motorcycling for my tastes at the present.

But, that said, I've know some guys who are deep into motorcycles.  And they're fucking crazy too.  Real crazy.  They pull shit that I wouldn't try in a million years.

Bottom line: It's all good.

I'll change it up a bit and hit you off with a funny one.

  From: Grumskikorsakov
Subject: Roger's Profanisaurus
Further to your obscure sexual terms, and in case you haven’t found it yourself, see the link below for ‘Roger Mellie – The man on the telly’s- Profanisuarus’ The lexicon of all obscure sexual terms and swearing. It comes from Viz the UK comic which contains such strips as ‘Spoilt Bastard’, ‘The Fat Slags’ and the ludicrously named ‘Jump Jet Fanny and her Hawker-Sidley Twat’…..as you’ll no doubt realize it is gut-achingly funny to the point of forced-bladder evacuation. Enjoy the site and looking up such classics in the Profanisaurus as, ‘Britney’s Chuff’ and particularly fitting for your PC problems, look up, ‘installing Windows’, and laugh yourself silly. There are quite literally thousands of weird and wonderful expressions with which to simultaneously impress and horrify your relatives and friends……..
viz.co.uk

Oh, good fun times right there. Thanks to that site I got a few new ones in my already extensive vocabulary. For example:

  cathedral sim.
Describing an oversized vagina. To the owner one could remark "By goodness! My organ's never played in a cathedral this size before".

Oh, that one's a winner. Uno mass:

  From: Ira
Subject: ira post
hey johnny, i thought i had made it onto the dc website when i saw ira on the daily pics but it isn't a link to ira ryan cycles but rather a naked lady with my name. what are the chances? i don't look that good naked but my lugged frames are pretty close. keep up the good work.
iraryancycles.com
and
iraryanbicycles.wordpress.com


 

Saturday, February 24, 2007
veronika   I   ira   I   jenipher   I   loli

I've been reading a lot lately about fixed gear road bikes with and without brakes. I've run a few of my fixies without brakes before, and I gotta tell ya, I prefer at least a front brake. I really don't like riding down a long hill and having to constantly press backwards on the pedals to check my speed. A few city blocks is one thing, but a mile or so of downhill grade just takes the fun right out of it.

I get called out time to time by various super hardcore dudes who think fixies shouldn't have brakes and I'm a douche and fuck jonny and all that noise. Well, I gotta tell ya, running a fixed gear without brakes isn't very hardcore. Here in Arizona (and probably other places as well) the BMX kids chop their bars down super narrow so they can bar spin everything and they take off their brakes because their wheels are squared from huge stair gaps. I asked one of these kids a few years ago how he stopped. He looked at me and said, "I powerslide, dude."

Then he demonstrated.  No brakes, one speed freewheel, cranks across the parking lot and pitched the thing into a two wheeled slide.  Insane.

So the next time you think you're all fucking hard riding your fixie around, think of the kids with no brakes and a freewheel on the back. When you can bunny hop a track bike into a two wheel sideways slide without the benefit of a fixed gear to stop like one of these maniac BMX kids come talk to me. Until then, enjoy leaning way forward over your front wheel and dragging your rear wheel around town.

Link dump:

[weird] topeak.com
[r.i.p.] backtorockville.typepad.com
[travesty of justice] usatoday.com/...julie amaro
[no idea how to do this] youtube.com
[we just work here] youtube.com
[doesn't look good] bvbl.net/?p=568
[more of the same] bvbl.net/?p=734#more-734

I wasn't even going to update the site today.  Just going to take it easy, try to get to bed at a decent hour. 

Yeah.  Didn't quite work out that way. We got late night results from today's MBAA race:

  From: Future
Subject: M.B.doublefuckin'A. race #2
Jonny,
Went down to the valley today for the second MBAA race at Estrella, it was hot! So hot in fact that Mike Raney of Flagstaff, represented with a 1st in singlespeed, riding for VOODOO cycles! Drunkcyclist made the podium as well in the pro/semi-slow with 4th place… The event was a success, there was lots of FREE beer in the venue provided by Mudshark! But where were the podium girls? Maybe that’s why people race road…
Keep it real man.


 

Friday, February 23, 2007
fiesta   I   extreme naturals   I   we live together   I   v is for victory

That's right kid, that's my boy BGR:  cyclingnews.com.  He came through tonight and helped me drink all the Knob Creek in the house.  It's all part of the recovery process.  Trust me.  We are very serious around here.

Looks like Floyd Landis has a little wiggle room: Lab mishandled Landis’ urine samples. I hope he comes out on top. I know I've been hard on him on these pages. Its because I expect a lot out of him.

I have an autographed picture of him on my wall, framed, right in front of me.  I've had it up there this whole time. Even before he won the Tour.  And I'm not planning on taking it down any time soon.

He's right up there with the rest of my heroes.  I have, from left to right, Andy Hampsten from the '88 Giro, LeMond from the '89 Tour, Lance Armstrong from the 2004 Tour and Landis in god knows what race.  All signed. All framed.  right in front of me.  Right now.

Damn right I'm hard on the old boy. Damn right.

I got another interview up. This on is with my man Todd Sadow of Epic Rides fame and fortune.  Check it out.

And, oh yeah, take a look at this.  New owner, new home.  Same fist.

Gee, who in the bike industry has a foosball table in their office?

I won't say who, but I will give you two quick quotes from the new owner(s):

  "The right thing would be for Cannondale to buy it back, and then to send that $1.2 M or so back to the people that got shafted as a result of their bankruptcy."

And -

  "We're looking forward to converting our $172.50 investment into $1.2
million."

Link dump:

[good times in iowa] bikeiowa.com
[racey race] thebroadbandracer.com/fly.aspx
[scared?] solamalos.com/RollerDerby
[wtf] gapingmaw.com
[whoops] tennessean.com
[tucson police dispatch] tucsonweekly.com
[good times] whatwouldjacobdo.com
[man, legend, nuff said] frameforum.net

Today's emails:

  From: Chris
Subject: double decker freestyle
having one of these bikes in my house right now makes me want to get extreme who's with me!?
vitalbmx.com

I'm more of a candy ass, really. But thanks anyway.

  From: e h
Subject: anna nicole shit-swallow
aren't you a little tired of the fucking broad from fuckfest 89' being all hailed on tv as a queen. life sucks and then you die. and for her , life couldn't have sucked too bad. i was watching headline news today at the gym while i was spinning (its 19 degrees here) and it had a red alert at bottom listing BREAKING NEWS, fuck that. no one actually cares where the most reamed hole in the history of sex is going to be buried. all this neo-nazi republican bird-shite that sprays from the rectum of the fox news's bowels needs to stop. james brown died. he had a scroll bar at the bottom of the screen. a week after the death of a prostitute, they fight over her body. breaking news. fuck.

I hear you on James Brown. That guy was a fucking legend. One of a kind. The King hands down.

There should have been a national day of mourning for him.


 

Thursday, February 22, 2007
giddy up   I   shay laren   I   lisa daniels

Cycilngnews.com has another couple of pics of my man Jackass dealing out the hurt at the Old Pueblo.  You can see 'em here and here.

Some guys got it, some guys don't. Jackass? He's got it. Me? No, not so much.

This Sunday following the end of the EPO Tour of California, there is a party at the Blue Cafe. Flyer download here: here.

I received two new obscure sexual terms from one of my fucked up friends today.  Yes, you too can be blessed with knowledge regarding the Back Alley Lolly and the Formal Frustration.

Today's exceptionally large link dump:

[blogness] redkev.blogspot.com
[oh. God. No.] hotprisonpals.com
[blogness] thehollisbabble.blogspot.com
[these glutes are made for walkin'] youtube.com
[cheney sucks] seattlepi.nwsource.com
[yo, what?] nbc4.tv/news...
[also works for bicycles] safespeed.org.uk
[wtf] news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news...
[wtf] emuse.ebaumsworld.com/video...
[all toto, all day] nyvelocity.com

And, of course, tonight's emails as follows:

  From: Martin
Subject: SSWC Update
Evening - sswc2007.com has just been updated with everything we know.

Main news is that pre-entry will open on 1st April - it'll be as painless as possible and we'll mail you with more info closer to the time. Don't panic, there will be plenty spaces although we expect entries to fill up fairly quickly.

We've been stoked by the number of folks who want to give you things - there's an updated list of these nice people on the site now.

Feel free to get in touch if you have any questions.
Slainte!
Chris, Jon & Marty

That would be the straight dope right there, people. And then we have...

  From: Ike the Viking
Subject: Team HOBO Chicks
Dude,
you post all these folks results and you leave out the Hobo Chicks.

What the fuck?

2 of them had never raced before and they still whooped ass placing 6th.

Pimp the flag love man.

Aight, my apologies. God Bless the Hobo Chicks. Please don't burn my house down.  I don't really know those girls.  I've seen one or two of them before the race a few times, and I saw them in the exchange tent during the night.  That's about it.

Sixth place is one fine performance.

And, Ike, the last time I saw you on Sunday, you had loaded your bike with so much shit you found in the dumpster I was wondering if you could pedal it back up the hill to your campsite.  But, you're a pro and I'm sure you made it just fine.

Check out these sites for more cool Old Pueblo write ups:  bobblog1.blogspot.com, bikehugger.com and sarahkaufmann.blogspot.com

  From: Erik
Subject: Monster Track NYC on a penny farthing
Monster Track 8 -NYC Fix Gear
This past weekend I raced in the 8th Annual Monster Track. This is NYC's (the worlds?) most badass fix-gear only, no brakes allowed, alley cat race. I only have one bike that meets those high standards - a 48 inch wheel Penny Farthing. It would have to do.

Before I had even heard about the nasty 25 mile course, the Fear had begun its sinister creep. I had trouble sleeping, and could barely eat as the race approached. Unlike most rides and events I do, this one had massive potential for getting smacked into a slush pile by some angry taxi or speeding SUV.

As the race began, the fear gave way to the second to second battle for survival that is riding a fix on the streets of NYC in winter. I held on pretty well during the 3 mile sprint uptown that started the race. However, by the end of the first of the three manifests, I was starting to suffer. I had to skip the second manifest, and head over the bridge into the rapidly darkening, and freezing streets and avenues of Brooklyn.

I bumbled by way from King Kog, past the Jesus folks (their "roadmap to salvation" would not help me get where I was going...) and finally found the bar that held the finish line. I ran in a few seconds behind a crew from Atlanta, and turned in the third manifest. I didn't complete the whole race, but I lived to ride again another day.

Later as we licked our wounds and drinks, and exchanged war stories, we all watched the race footage from Lucas Brunells helmet cam. Austin held the lead for most of the event on his brand new Brooklyn Machine Works track bike. While Austin was skitching with traffic on the Williamsburg bride, Lucas grabbed onto him as well. Halfway across the span, at speeds of about 50mph, Austin lost his grip, and he and Lucas slowed back to a human pace. Seconds later, Alfred flew past holding onto a taxi. Then Felipe. Austin attempted to grab a passing car to get back into the lead, but was thrown over the bars by the acceleration. He remained relatively uninjured, but was not able to pass Alfred or Felipe who came in first and second. Heidi beat Dagga for the fastest of the ladies, followed by Heather. Hiroyuki from Toyko took first out-of-towner.

This footage will premier at this years Bicycle Film Festival in NYC - May 16 - 20.
bicyclefilmfestival.com

I'll be back next year, ready to rock the whole thing on the highwheel.

Gaze at my works and despair.
Fergie

PS The deadline for film submissions to the festival has been extended to March 1. See the link above for more info.

One more and I'm out!

  From: Lopo
Subject: Poo flingin
First off I would like to say it was good to see you out and about last weekend at the race. And second...I would just like to comment on the snow making thing. Why don't we just build a downhill park and get it over with.

I know there are even more arguments about this topic but in my eyes it just makes more sense. If whistler can do it with 2 and a half months of warm weather we can do it with 7 to 9 months...or dare i say a whole season of warmth. Just puttin it out there. Have a good one.

I happen to agree with that one. It you build it, they will come. Snow Bowl collects revenue through the summer months, and folks have a place to ride that style of bike to their hearts content. Everyone wins.

The problem is the resort is in wilderness. Sure, they drive snowmobiles (and god knows what else) all over it all winter, but somehow bikes are different. It's bull.


 

Wednesday, February 21, 2007
alicia tyler   I   erica campbell   I   femjoy

Yo, hump day already? Man, where does the time go? I leave town for two days and three days later I'm still not caught up.

Hit the "get mail" button a few minutes ago. What? 96 brand new unread emails coming down the pipe straight at me, that's what. As of 2:00 this afternoon. And they are all new.

Just shoot me already.

Today's quote:

"If you're one of those people who puts solar panels on your house or drives a battery powered car, you might as well vote for Gore."
- Dick Cheney Oct 3, 2000

Thanks, Dick Bag.

Link dump:

[it's a good thing] active.com/donate/SpinOdyssey07/JBrien3
[fyi] askaninja.com
[stolen bike alert] drunkcyclist.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=20
[old pueblo slide show] community.azstarnet.com/slideshows
[jack me off] sfgate.com
[dawn till dusk] drunkcyclist.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=803
[gravel rouser] drunkcyclist.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=804
[totabulous] nyvelocity.com
[sad, yet still funny] youtube.com/watch?v=mim90zCi34Y
[fun] mandylozano.blogspot.com...i have to register for accounting

For those of you who don't know, or don't care, or whatever, I've been using Dreamweaver MX to maintain this site for years. It works and I already have the program so why change a good thing, right? Same type of thinking that drew me to single speeds: Don't make it any more complicated than it has to be. Just make it work.

Well, me and Dreamweaver ain't seeing eye to eye to much these days. It's slow, it makes clunky pages and it's mired in the past. Back in 2001 the percentage of all HTML edited by Dreamweaver was something like 70%. As in, most people used it.

Now it's gotta be more like 7% of all webmasters use Dreamweaver. And we're all a bunch of crusty jackasses.  Its time to forget about those seven speed top mounts I suppose.

I don't know what's going to happen next, only that something has to give. These gigantic, code heavy, slow loading web pages are fucking stupid. And I don't really know why I keep making them.

  From: Mike
Subject: so fucking pissed
I am so pissed off I can't take it.
washingtonpost.com

Yeah, support the troops, right? You bunch of bastards. You keep throwing that phrase in the face of anyone who questions your little "war". And you don't do a fucking thing to support the troops yourself. Its all hollow rhetoric to you. That's all it's ever been

Nothing more than a tool to leverage those in congress who might cut off funding. Even though it was you that sent too few men with too little equipment into a conflict with no clear goals, contingency planning, or exit strategy. 

And when those poor bastards come back and need our help, you stick 'em in some dump and forget about them. Because they never meant anything more to you than winning an election, did they?

Fuck you Bush. Fuck you Cheney. Fuck you all.

Of course, these buildings didn't fall into the state of disrepair and neglect they're currently in overnight.  And the careless personnel and erosion of responsibility also took a while to get where it's at. But that does not change the fact that this is happening on George Bush's watch.  It's his responsibility to make sure that our returning soldiers are cared for.

The buck stops with him.


 

Tuesday, February 20, 2007
licensed to lick   I   jessica james   I   natalie

Yo, the day after the day after a twenty four hour race is always the hardest for me. Every year, it's the same thing: Sunday is weird, Monday is painful. Staying up all night throws me in the gutter. Even when I don't actually race in the race.

Just being there is enough to absorb plenty of pain via osmosis.

That makes Tuesday the day I try and pull my head out of my ass and get caught up on everything. So far, not so good.

Go figure.

All I know is that I'm going to bbq a pork tenderloin tonight and drink a few bottles of wine with my folks. Call me crazy, but it sounds like a good time.

Link dump:

[the bitch is crazy] youtube.com
[arizona = stupid as hell] morganquitno.com/edrank.htm
[restore habeas corpus] restore-habeas.org
[cycling is dead] mattye.net/2007/02/irony.html
[boom bip] sportsillustrated.cnn.com/swimsuit/collection/covers
[insane carbon fixed gear] frameforum.net
[totally badass] youtube.com/watch?v=J-7fyChKOBM

Email dump:

 

From: Aaron
Subject: they can ban cyclists from a road?
Hey Johnny,
I'm out of the loop these days as far as cycling is concerned, so I don’t know if this made it into the mags, but have you seen this?
ajc.com/search/content/...metcyclist0124b.html

There are several related articles on their site:
ajc.com/search/search/cyclist...

I used to live near the area and have ridden this road. As you’d expect, the article is pretty slanted against cyclists. I can’t think of a road in Phx that is comparable, but this is a low-speed, medium to light traffic residential/park road surrounded by dense urban(ish) high-speed, heavy traffic roads. If you had to pick a kind of road that would most benefit from more bikes, less cars, this would be it. It’s not like they’re out on the interstate here.

What got me was the portrayal of the cyclists. Metro Atlanta has a huge cycling community despite the roads being really dangerous for bikes, and 99% of them are not cocky when dealing with cars. When riding there, you're more focused on riding defensively and saving your tail than getting pissed off at every single driver that does something stupid.

What can you say, really, besides "bikes belong".

  From: LSD
Subject: lt 100
dear jonny,
I'm really tired of hearing all this stuff about the lt 100 and how it's such a cool, hard, epic race etc... I'm sure the recent news about lance and floyd doing it (or not) has brought a lot of attention to the event, but come on, it's nothing but a high priced race that, for some reason, has been added to everyone's "must do list". If you like long jeep roads and no single track, and paying out the ass for a fricking belt buckle (if you finish in under 8 hours or something), maybe this one is for you, but there are a ton of other races that are more noteworthy and a hell of a lot cheaper: Crested Butte Classic (free), KTR (free), the Grand Loop (free), Soul Ride (when it comes back)(not free, but reasonable)...I can go on and on. When are people going to wake up and just ride their bikes? They don't need a belt buckle to tell them they suffered. "Wiensy" will help with that when he puts the wood to them (if they even get that close). I'm sure I'm going to piss off a bunch of people (maybe even you), but I'm just tired of the recognition this race gets. See ya at the Old Pueblo (best event ever!)

Ride Anything But Leadville

Good 'ol Leadville. Yo, I did it once. Then I did it twice. And then I was going to do it a third time. I don't think that third time is going to ever happen.

We'll see. But, as you say, there are a lot of other events out there. And I'd sure like to try a few of 'em while I still can.

I've got two small belt buckles. And that's probably enough for the big man.


 

Monday, February 19, 2007
carol goldnerova   I   silvia saint   I   jana mar

Oh deal lord god in heaven, another Old Pueblo in the books. And it was a scorcher.The results are up over at Epic Rides for your reading pleasure.

All the drunkcyclist riders wore the colors with pride this weekend. Lemme give ya a quick breakdown: I had three guys dueling it out in the four man category (I know, they're kinda nuts) and they came in 17th with 19 laps. That means they came in front of about 60 teams with four members.

Looks like someone was carrying some dead weight.

The Girls of Drunkcyclist kept it real with a 12th place in a category with 13 teams. My only complaint is that they got edged out by none other than the Sweet Sluts of Santa Fe.

With a name like that, you just gotta be good. It's like showing up with a left handed guitar strung upside down and playing right handed. Looks like next year I need to field two women's squads.

The Drunkcyclist men's duo squad came in 24th after Jackass blew the seals in his fork all to hell. Did I mention those two knuckle heads are apparently way better at running than cycling these days?

Check out my man Jackass opening quite a gap and showing 'em all a clean set of heels during the opening Lemon's scramble:

Yes, he is a hard man.

And, last but definitely not least, Big Gay Randy hauled ass and got 3rd in the solo singlespeed category on his fixed gear Surly Karate Monkey. You sir, are the fucking man.

There is talk of BGR having a go at the Great Divide Race. I am very excited about the prospect. (Attn Surly employees: BGR will deliver)

I'd like to give special mention to the following folks in no particular order:

Randy Sooter for his sixth place in the solo single speed category.

No Shift Sherlock rep'n AZ to the fullest in the single speed four man category with a second place.

Local Big Swinging Dick Dejay Birch claimed the fastest single speed night lap at an hour and 38 seconds. And believe me when I tell you that is a fucking fast night lap. They went down to the Jack Mormon Militia where Chucky Gibson blazed the single speed fastest daylight lap at 57 minutes.

Chucky is the brother of none other than Race "I love breaking" Gibson, my Leadville nemesis/riding buddy of the past few years.

The fastest overall laps (also the geared laps) were both claimed by Kona's Erik Tonkin with a mind numbing 55:20 in daylight and an impressive 56:32 at night. That man scares me.

I'd also like to point out that my man Kevin Noble is apparently unable to pull one twelve hour lap out of his ass. Yes, he couldn't figure out how to do it. His teammate did it. Him, no. Not really. Luckily, they still managed to finish dead last in the hard fought duo category.

There was a Kona Media Squad, and I have no idea how they finished 'cause I can't seem to find them in the results.

And big ups to Andrew 40 Hands. I had a bet with that joker on the Eagles - Giants game back in December: "If the Eagles manage to pull off the win I will bring you a case of Olde English (40 ouncers of course) to the race of your choice."

I got a case of 40's. And we drank them.

Sure, Big Pun and Mr. 40 Hands put 'em down before I did. But I don't try and race pros like Pun when it comes to 40s. I like living.

Go figure on that one.

Me? I didn't touch a bike all weekend. Not even once.

I did, however, pony up and volunteer for the 11:30pm to 6:00am shift in the exchange tent. That's when hearts are broken and dreams shattered. The Witching Hours.

Good times.

I drove down with Big Pun on Friday. He had to stop off in Phoenix for a 10:00am meeting for work. (Yes, he actually has a job other than drinking) Since the office stop was right on Central, I walked over to the Phoenix Art Museum for an hour and a half and chilled till he was finished knocking heads together and we could get some lunch.

And lunch was fantastic. I took Pun to Honey Bears BBQ on Van Buren. One of my favorite spots in the whole universe.

After dropping off our camping gear and claiming a little real estate at the race site, we heading back into Tucson for whiskey at the Tap Room and a plate of Carne Seca at El Charro.

If you've not had Carne Seca, I suggest you try it in the near future.

On the way back through Phoenix on Sunday, we stopped at Uncle Sam's at the 101 and Shea for Cheese Steaks. (wid provolone, onions and sweet peppers)

Yes, it was nothing less than the Tour of Food.

Link dump:

[atheist hip hop] thecomptoneffect.com/music.php
[go boston] collegehumor.com/video:1741589
[cool] journeytoforever.org
[michael wesch] spraygraphic.com/...the-machine-is-using-us
[in case you were wondering] processedworld.com

Tonight's email:

 

From: Debbie
Subject: my shop is having a going out of business sale
Hi,
I just had a customer in my shop who told me about your website...name is Dave W. He saw my ads with Craig's List and said you may throw some free advertising my way. I could surely use it as I need to be out of the building by mid-March when my lease is up.

My name is Debbie Severson owner of Bike Age in east Phoenix. My husband and I were in business 13 years at 318 No. 48th St. We're just 3 miles west of the Phoenix Zoo and Papago Park. My husband of 33 years died last August after a 5 year battle against cancer. First in his throat and then it snuck into his lungs without anyone noticing until it was too late.

We began cycling in 1985 when Emphysema was diagnosed and cycling was strongly encouraged to develop lung power. I'm closing the shop, well actually I tried to sell it as a business first, but the last 2 years we were closed more often than not, doing the chemo and radiation thing so business suffered and our income went to hell. Not an income tax return I could promote as a 'healthy concern'.

So I'm liquidating everything. Store fixtures, bike work stand, truing stand, bike parking stands, display grids....you get the idea. All the 'boneyard' or used parts area is already marked down ridiculously cheap and all new merchandise is 10% for tubes, slime and chains.

All clothing is ½ off, and everything else is 25% off the marked price but for bike tights which are 1/3 off beginning Saturday.

I'll be posting another updated listing with Craig's list on Friday and would appreciate your spreading the word to your loyal readers.

phoenix.craigslist.org/bik/279935067.html

Feel free to write or ask questions.
Best Regards,
:Debbie


Thursday, February 15, 2007
oka   I   nice   I   friends

Pun came through and spent two hours last night wiping the drive, reloading the OS and sorting out all the hardware issues. And all I gave him was a dc beanie.

We're both driving down to Tucson tomorrow for the 24 Hours in the Old Pueblo. Neither of us are racing it, we're just going 'cause we can.

And it's warm down there.

It's pretty weird that I've done this race for the past six years. This would have been the seventh time in a row. Instead of turning pedals in anger I'll be tipping beers in earnest. As it should be.

Since I owe Big Pun for all the work he did, I'll be picking up a few bar tabs. I think this weekend might get a bit expensive.

And fun.

We've got a new advertiser on board: Live Jasmin. But sure to check 'em out.

  Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. This is not a way of life at all in any true sense. Under the cloud of threatening war, it is humanity hanging from a cross of iron.

Dwight D. Eisenhower, From a speech before the American Society of Newspaper Editors, April 16, 1953
34th president of US 1953-1961 (1890 - 1969)

From: quotationspage.com/quote/9556.html

Ah, what else is new?

Link dump:

[hardaway is a douche] sports.espn.go.com/nba/news
[Ty Ziegel: war is hell] archive.reduxpictures.com
[Ty Ziegel: backstory] timesonline.co.uk
[we ruin lives] washingtonpost.com
[blogness] community.centredaily.com/?q=blog/419
[the right idea] nytimes.com
[go figure] latimes.com
[think he'll go hard line on this one?] cnn.com/scalia.daughter

  From: A Bomb
Subject: trust - but verify
highclearing.com/5927
highclearing.com/5928
highclearing.com/5929
highclearing.com/5931
highclearing.com/5932
highclearing.com/5933
highclearing.com/5934
highclearing.com/5957

I would just permanently link or bookmark these...

My man Garro forwarded me this one:

  From: Garro
Subject: FW: Snowtoiletbowl
Ya go find some where else to be white. Aren't there some Indians in Alaska to go fuck with maybe some lost tribe in Russia that you can go practice some good old fashion cultural genocide all in the name of money. Maybe because it doesn't snow in flag we could just resort to selling some silver jewelry and a few kichina dolls you know make money with the climate the "great spirit" gave us. You can bet the whities wouldn't want the Indians to wash the glass windows on the US treasury building or the world trade center with Indian piss water. Whities have sacred mountains too, there just made of steel glass and money.

What do you think should I send this to NPR?

Light heartedly yours
Yak Yensen


 

Wednesday, February 14, 2007
jana cova   I   anetta keys   I   friends

My computer is facing some serious work tonight. I can type this stuff up, but I can't upload it at the moment. I'm in a spot of bother. My computer is fucked up. I've got all the disc to reload the whole enchilada. But I can't get Windows XP to load...

Yeah, I can already hear the chorus: Fuck XP! Jonny, you're a retard! Get off the Microsoft jock!

Whatever.

I've called in Big Pun.

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, the big man is coming to work his magic. This little bitch is no longer cooperating with me. I warned her, I said I'd call him. I backed up everything that matter to me. And even some shit that doesn't matter to me at all. I got all kinds of room on my 100 GB external hard drive for everyone.

Come on in, the waters fine.

It's all gone pear shaped and I'm going to flush the whole thing into California Bay. I got five words for ya: Sea Side Property in Arizona.

Go figure, I've had this new machine for six months. It's time to reload the operating system and all that supporting software in a pile of discs next to me. I hate this shit.

Link dump:

[blogness] futureofthebook.org
[lick lorelei] blog.myspace.com
[more dumbshit from bush] tpmmuckraker.com
[avoid the debate] electioncentral.tpmcafe.com
[brutal] katu.com/news/5738701.html


 

Monday, February 12, 2007
the captain   I   paris   I   emmanuelle

Here is a list of everyone who made the selection for the 2007 Trail 100. I don't see anyone names Lance Armstrong or Floyd Landis.

But I do see Jake Rubelt and a handful of others from Flagstaff, Arizona.

I'm having tons of computer problems at the moment.  It figures, I haven't done much to this new machine since mid-august.  I think it's time to reload the whole enchilada and start with a clean slate.

Fucking computers.  These things are such pieces of shit.  Really.  They are.

Happy Darwin Day.

Link dump:

[he's back] cyclingnews.com/photos/besseges
[fucking iran now?] whoisioz.blogspot.com
[the stakes couldn't be higher] sfgate.com
[greasewood park...] tucsonweekly.com
[no hands, one leg] teamchainreaction.com
[way past the landing] zapiks.com
[all about the fams] npr.org

Tonight's email:

  From: Erik
Subject: Five years for killing a Tucson bicyclist
Hey Jon, I wanted to make sure you saw this:
azstarnet.com/metro/168010

The guy got five years for killing a Tucson bicyclist. He was high on meth when he hit her, and he fled the scene and covered up the evidence, which is to say: he had a friend help him scrape pieces of her skull off his windshield, according to the article. He already had a couple of DUIs. He continued to use meth while awaiting sentencing.

One more reason Tucson is "gold" cycling city.

Shit like that just makes my skin crawl. The driver and the cyclist we on meth at the time of the incident. In-fucking-sane.

  From: Hawk
Subject: I'm a fukken waste
Klink Klink, glugluglug, skribble skribble. Oh shit, I'm spilling this shit on my desk. Well I don't waste that. It's woodford reserve. WAY too good for a paper towel. too good even for a fine dishrag. So i go to suck it up. Holy fuck. have you ever taken a desk shot of whiskey and eraser dust? Fukken murder on the throat cape, no lie. But in the spirit of conservation and knowing all you do to reduce reuse and recycle anything that makes a body feel tite on a friday nite, i had to let you know i took the shot. eraser dust and all. All for naught. I choked like a motherfucker. Jenni came out and goes "What's the matter with you?" I say "More than you can possibly pray to tackle at this hour, love. Now go get some rest, tomorrow morning is going to suck."

Fukken eraser dust. I have a lot of drawing to do.

Whiskey and Coconuts,
Hawk.


 

Saturday, February 10, 2006
cassandra   I   lydia   I   erica campbell

24 Hours of the Old PuebloI read in the Times today that Discovery Channel is pulling the plug on their cycling sponsorship. This year is to be the last for the Disco Kids.

They came on board as Lance Armstrong won the Tour de France seven times in a row. And they're tossing in the towel after Floyd Landis took the Tour and had his little drug scandal. Seven times on top, one time in the shitter

That's a seven to one ratio for American cyclists. Ride the wave, and cut out early. Damn shame. You wonder what ratio would have been acceptable from a marketing position? Seventeen to one?

117:1?

Link dump:

[disco out] cyclingnews.com
[disco out] velonews.com
[pound censured] latimes.com/sports...
[good times] howtoavoidthebummerlife.com
[what are you complaining about?] velonews.com


 

Friday, February 9, 2007
shay laren   I   maylen   I   crissy moran

Today was the end of my "Glad to still be here, thank you" sale at dcgear.net.  And the response was huge.  Thanks for all the business.  It kept me busy this week.

Now what in the hell am I going to do tomorrow?

Sleep?

Yeah maybe.  We'll see how that goes.

At this point I'm just biding my time till Paris-Nice and the Spring Classics.

Link dump:

[wtf] sports.espn.go.com
[the damn plane] talkingpointsmemo.com
[a cappella no less] youtube.com
[more chrome lugs] somafab.com/speedster.html
[northern indiana mountain bike association] nimba-bike.org

Today's email:

  From: John
Subject:
Jonny;
I’m sure you read this one – am wondering if you had the same reaction I did – very interesting indeed, huh?? – an innocent non-sequiter on Tinkov’s part, or a serious Freudian slip?? – I mean, Tyler’s innocent, right???
From Cyclingnews.com Fri. 2/9 (italics are mine):

Hamilton targets Giro
Oleg Tinkov, the squad's manager, also thought that Hamilton "earned a second chance. He paid for what he did and now he has the right to reintegrate society."

OOOPS!!......careful there Oleg, I would expect a guy who made a bazillion dollars in the beer business to be a little slicker than that – or maybe he had sampled a little too much of his product before the press conference……

Interesting too how Big Business and the Mob in Russia are as inextricably linked as Professional Cycling and doping…..and funny isn’t it how Tinkov was the guy to sign Hamilton….Dick Pound had better watch his back, huh?? – anyone who fucks with Tyler now is going to wind up at the bottom of the Kaspian Sea with a new pair of cement sneakers…

Yup….”Believe” indeed…”Believe” Tyler was doped to the fucking gills……

Christ, I need a drink dude…

Yep. It does make you wonder. He either was wrongly accused, or he fucked up, got caught and served his time.  Full stop.

Was he innocent all along, or has he paid his dues?  It can't very well be both.


 

Thursday, February 8, 2007
one can dream   I   damn baby   I   nice tats, bozo

Another pic in from "Unnamed Industry Source #2".

'Nuff said. Bid on it here: cgi.ebay.com.

You'd think the way I'm pimpin' that damn thing I was getting a piece of the action. But, no. Not my deal.

Let's start the rumor mill up with this one: I have it on good authority that Kona will be producing a lugged steel road bike for next year. And yes, those would be chrome lugs. Expect a complete bike for around $2,000 USD and a frameset for $800.

And that is way cool.  Chromed lugs on a production road bike?  Who woulda thought?

What else is going on?  Well, I got a few new interviews under my belt. Yes, I actually got around to interviewing a few folks. 

First up is everyone's favorite AZ homeboy Phil Zajicek.  Second I bring to you none other than Lorelei Lee.  Just because I can.

And I did.

You can see all three of my interviews here.

Link dump:

[go bush go] tpmmuckraker.com
[this kid...] youtube.com
[like a traffic accident] bunnyranch.net
[insane] konaeurope.com
[the real] zaynebraun.blogspot.com
[check these guys] thebaconstrip.wordpress.com
[oh my...] velonews.com
[covers all the bases] jormabike.com

Tonight's email:

  From: SKRPN
Subject: anna nicole
anna nicole is dead. i'll fuck her corpse and pee in her eye socket

Damn. The guys that read this site are so fucked up.

And yo, the line starts to my left.

I don't know what to feel about Ms. Smith. That chick was a fucking train wreck. The saddest part of all is her young daughter. How old is that kid now, maybe five months?

Now that shit is just awful.

I need something to pick me up.  Oh, this'll work.  Those cats in New York, they know how to have a good time.

  From: Andy
Subject: check it out
Dude,
We had another party. More hotness. And a special guest.
nyvelocity.com/content.php?id=1220
nyvelocity.com/content.php?id=1221
nyvelocity.com/content.php?id=1222
nyvelocity.com/content.php?id=1223

Yo, who doesn't need more hotness?

  From: Dano
Subject: regarding the faggot link...
Yo Big Jonny... I just ran across this pic from when I was in England with my friends band, Good Riddance... the guy holding the faggots is Russ, lead singer. We are tripp'n hard on the weird shit they eat over there... good stuff.

Dude, six faggots in gravy?

In this country you'd be paid crisp green money (and a lot of it) to eat something like that.

Not the other way around.

  From: Racer Jared
Subject: yo yo yo
hey, that that pic was from Leadville 2005 not 2006, 2006 was the year that Snake flagged me down in town and told me some bad, bad news. Glad you are well along the road to recovery.

On a brighter note I'm in Australia right now, riding road bikes, going to the beach.

Dude, I gotta tell ya, I'm sorry I won't be riding the nine plus hour pace with you this year. And who's gonna call you a sissy on the downhills if I'm not there?

Judging by your blistering performance in 2005, damn near everyone is going to call you a sissy on the downhills.

Press releases as follows:

  From: Cycling Promotion Fund
Subject: Cycling Promotion Fund Media Release: February 8th 2007
No Fuel Tank, No Exhaust Pipe: Cycling is the no regrets option to reduce oil dependence

cyclingpromotion.com.au

The Inquiry into Australia's future oil supply and alternative transport fuels tabled its report in Parliament yesterday, the 7th February 2007.

Of the 192 submissions received by the Senate Rural and Regional Affairs and Transport Committee, the majority warned of the impending petrol shortfall due to Peak Oil.

"With rising world demand and increasing concern over availability, the need to reduce Australia's oil consumption has to be a priority, and this was noted by the Senate Committee's report", says Elliot Fishman, Policy Officer with the Cycling Promotion Fund.

Cycling is seen as a "No Regrets" option by the Committee, meaning that even if the onset of Peak Oil occurs later than expected, the community benefits from numerous social, environmental and transport outcomes inherent to cycling.

The Committee noted that Australia's oil production has reduced over recent years and is set to decline further in the future. The interim report identified work by Geoscience Australia that our nation may only be capable of producing 20% of its oil needs by 2026.

Mr. Fishman highlights that "The Senate Inquiry made it clear that in addition to being an oil-free form of transport, cycling is an effective tool against our obesity and diabetes epidemics."

The Senate Committee's report produced supply and demand side responses to Peak Oil. Supply side responses involve measures to increase the availability of transport fuels, such as coal-to-liquid technology.

Converting coal to liquids is a notoriously greenhouse gas intensive process. The Committee acknowledged that it would be a "flawed response" to undertake solutions to our liquid transport fuel problem without consideration for climate change.

Fishman says "Unlike many of the supply side options provided to the Senate Committee, such as coal-to-liquids, cycling represents a zero emission form of transport. Our current policy environment requires us to propose responses to Peak Oil that are greenhouse sensitive. Bicycles have no exhaust pipe."

Unlike dirty supply side responses, the Committee identified cycling as a zero-oil, zero-emission solution to the pending oil crisis.

During public sessions, the Senate Inquiry was told by urban transport experts that over 30% of car journeys in Australian cities are less than 3km. Fishman adds that "given a significant proportion of our car trips are incredibly short, cycling represents a realistic, sustainable alternative to unnecessary car use".

The report underscores the important contribution cycling can make by highlighting "A litre of oil saved…by turning a car trip into a bicycle trip, is just as real as a litre of oil found by new exploration…"

The drought and subsequent water restrictions have demonstrated that Australians have an excellent capacity to adapt to new situations.

"We are on the verge of entering a petrol drought. As we approach the point at which less and less oil will be available year upon year, Australian's will need to become fuel smart and adapt to a low oil lifestyle, just as we have done with water" says Fishman.

Central to this process will be the need to reduce car use and increase rates of cycling. The international and domestic evidence is clear - people choose to cycle when the urban environment supports it. All levels of government have a responsibility to provide a safe environment for people to cycle.

One of the most cost effective methods of responding to rising oil prices in a significant increase in investment for bike lanes and paths, lower speed limits and better bike parking. As Fishman points out "increasing the attractiveness of cycling not only allows Australians to reduce their oil dependence, it's also one of the best ways of combating climate change, obesity and congestion".

Media inquiries:

Elliot Fishman, Research and Policy Officer,
Cycling Promotion Fund: 0438 547 450 Some relevant facts:

- In 2004 transport accounted for almost 14% of Australia's net emissions with 76.2 mega tonnes of carbon dioxide equivalent - 23% higher than the 1990 level.

- In 2006 Australians' purchased 1.2 million bicycles - close to double the number of 1987.

- In The State Of The Union Address, President Bush Announced a "Twenty In Ten" Plan To Reduce U.S. Gasoline Usage By 20 Percent In The Next Ten Years.

- PARIS is bracing for a transport revolution later this year with the arrival of more than 20,000 free public bicycles.


 

Wednesday, February 7, 2007
licensed to blow   I   kathy lee   I   angel cassidy

First up, I got some old pics of that trophy currently up for grabs at cgi.ebay.com.  The one the fine folks at the Society of People Who Actually Make Their Own Shit (SOPWAMTOS) presented to Cannondale for their "Successful Reorganization". 

The pics came from an unnamed industry source.  The email said, among other things, "after the auction is over we're going to send a photo slide 'history' of the thing, starting with the all-man bachelor party in at a campground outside Bend OR, where the fist made its debut. Keep that pimp hand strong....."

Yes, you can bid on a piece of cycling history.  You could be the man.

 

And to think that fine trophy ended up in a trash can in the Sands Convention center.... Can you feel it?

Don't forget this week's big Six Month's Out Sale over at dcgear.net.  A straight 20% off all merchandise is nothing to fuck with.

Link dump:

[oh god no] sexinchrist.com/fist.html
[toto-rific] nyvelocity.com
[big pun's life explained] news.bbc.co.uk
[oh god no II] thesuperficial.com
[yes, he's an idiot] filecabi.net
[what?] news.bbc.co.uk

Yesterday I told my wife about the whole "I'm not doing Leadville this year" thing. She seemed surprised.

Surprised I was even considering it.

She goes, "Do you remember what the Doctor told you about your back?"

Um, what did the doctor say?  Should I try to bullshit her?  Nah, she'll see right through it. She always sees straight through it.

"He told you that after a year, you might not think about it every day."

Well, I guess I'll have another beer then.

We got a whole lot of email today.  And by "we" I pretty much mean "me".

  From: Pimpbot
Subject: Sheldon Brown not doing so well.
Hey Fuckstick,
I thought you and the cycling community outghta know. I guess our man, our hero, Sheldon Brown is not doing so well in the health department.

Mtbr.com thread here:
forums.mtbr.com/showthread.php?t=267659

We should all send him our thoughts and prayers to get better.

More on Sheldon Brown's Health issues: sheldonbrown.org/journal/health.html.

  From: Sly Fox
Subject: big j from sly in the big city SLC
yo bj
im sellin my life on egay, check it out.
cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors...
bikehusla.blogspot.com

I've never met Mr. Fox, but I'll tell ya like this: That kid is fucking crazy.

File this one under "it's a small world after all..."

  From: Rob in Queens
Subject: Crazy Eddie
Holy shit, Crazy fucking Eddie's? I worked there way back when. '86 or so. Long hair, Tuborg Gold, Tango, Catholic School Girls lettin' loose and Iron Maiden t-shirts. What a fucking blast from the past.


 

Tuesday, February  6, 2007
devon michaels   I   brooke haven   I   teona

Thanks to all of you folks hitting up the Six Months Out Sale over at dcgear.net.  I've packed up more orders in the last 48 hours than I did the entire month of January.

Go figure, people like sales.

When I was growing up in a little town outside of Philadelphia there was a guy hawking his wares on tv now and again called Crazy Eddie.  The guy was off the chart, always yelling about how "insane" he was putting everything on sale and all that.

Well, tonight I'm Crazy Eddie. 

This afternoon I got in an order of knit beanies from the fine folks over at Career Cap.  And instead of waiting to the end of my little 20% off everything Six Months Out sale to put 'em up in the store, I'm putting 'em up tonight.  At 20% off with the rest of my merchandise.

Why?  Because they're cool and I know people are going to love 'em.  They're reversible, black on one side and gold on the other.  Two hats for the price of one, folks.  Check 'em out:

I saw Bensy at a party the other night. I walked up to him and told him, "I can't wait to go back to Leadville with you."

"What?!? You're doing Leadville again?" He spit his beer out on his chest. "Did you just say we're doing Leadville?"

"No man," I told him, "I'm not racing it. Fuck that shit. I'm going up to help out Snake."

"Oh, I was wondering..." He sounded relived as he looked down and wiped Tecate off his shirt. 

He sure didn't seem to excited about the prospect of turning a pedal in anger at Leadville.

Maybe I'm not either.  I decided just two weeks back that I am not doing Leadville this year.  I just don't want it hanging over my head all summer.  All I want to do it ride bikes again and have fun doing it.  The way things are going, that's going to be plenty of work.

I don't need to clobber the shit outta myself in August.

Leadville 2006. [Correction, this is 2005.  In 2006 I was in the hospital.]  Those were the days.  That's me in the middle. Snake left, Bensy right.  9:34:22 that year for the big man.  And I'm cool with it.

Snake: This your fucking year. If you don't win it I'm going to fucking shoot someone.

Link dump:

[things to keep in mind] tsrocks.com
[get in line, dumbfucks] talkingpointsmemo.com
[plamegate timeline] tpmcafe.com
[they'd make good nazis] tpmmuckraker.com
[oh god no] buzzfeed.com/Christians_Having_Sex
[kicking ass and taking names] youtube.com

This next one is too good for just the link dump treatment. Not that there's anything wrong with the link dump treatment, but, you know. Check this out: cgi.ebay.com.

Talk about a chance to own a piece of history. I want that damn thing more than I want to wake up tomorrow morning and see daylight. All I can think of doing is buying the fucking thing, bringing it to Vegas and beating the first poor son of a bitch snow tire salesman in an embroidered Cannondale button up I can find about the head and shoulders with it.  And then reminding him to take it home with him after the show this year each time I saw the poor son of a bitch for the rest of the week.

I could even let Gnome get in a few whacks.  It makes him feel better about things.

Seller claims "I got this out of the trash at the 2005 Interbike Trade Show in Las Vegas."  I'll be he worked for Cannondale and ended up with it as part of his generous severance package.

The caption reads as follows:

"The Golden Fist Award"
Presented to
CANNONDALE
For Their
"Successful" Reorganization

Some shit you just can't make up. God Bless the Society of People Who Actually Make Their Own Shit (SOPWAMTOS). Those guys help keep the cycling industry fun.


 

Monday, February 5, 2007
  lee   I   kitana jade   I   lily

drunkcyclist.com

Today marks the sixth month anniversary of me being hit by a drunk driver on August 5th of 2006.  Six months out and I'm just about mad as all hell.

This week only, February 5th through the 9th, all drunkcyclist merchandise is 20% off. Every shirt, sticker and pair of socks.

Because it's nice to be alive.

So go buy something from dcgear.net.

Today's link dump is all about music in one way or another:

[joy division] joydivision.homestead.com
[editors - munich video] musicomh.com
[totally badass] goodweatherforairstrikes.com
[justice] bbc.co.uk/dna/collective
[pics] newwavephotos.com


 

Sunday, February 4, 2007 - Second Edition
shay laren   I   nina dolce   I   lonnie waters

This just in: Jake Rubelt of RideClean won the 2007 edition of the Usery Pass Road Race.  I'm proud to say drunkcyclist is a sponsor of RideClean.

He's been second in this race at least twice that I can remember.  It may be three times.  Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.

You'll notice that he is wearing one of his many rather large Leadville buckles on the poduim.  Is this the year Snake takes the top spot at Leadville too?

  From: Lovedog
Subject: Usery Pass 1st place Podium shot
Snake rides clean..........................away from everyone!

RIDECLEAN takes 1st, at first Pro1-2 road race of the year, Yeah Baby!!

That's my boy!

And on the right, second spot, that is Jonathon Parrish of the Waste Management squad.  He was hit by a car back on October 15, 2006 during the Tour de Scottsdale and suffered a broken collarbone and compression fractures in his spine.

When I saw him at the Fourth Street Bike Swap in Tucson in November he was wearing a back brace.

Kid, I gotta tell ya, it's good to see you doing well. 


 

Sunday, February 4, 2007
catalina & mikayla   I   cali luv   I   luba

It's Super Bowl Sunday and most of the house is sick.  I'm getting better but I'm not 100% yet.

Sorta like my back.

I'm off to watch the game in a few minutes, so this promises to be a short one.

Link dump:

[pimp] frameforum.net
[cross worlds] planb.smugmug.com/gallery
[white & nerdy] youtube.com
[biker down] news.bbc.co.uk
[my space rocket] youtube.com
[the real tehran] lucasgray.com/...peacetrain

Today's emails:

  From: Mike
Subject: What to do if Bush starts a a war with Iran
Big J,
Moving is a good option, since sedition would probably land one in more trouble than ever in US history, and likely has a more flexible definition to Rove and Sons.

Try New Zealand. They have placed bicycle mechanics in the Skilled Migrant Category--which allowed me and mine permanent residency. So here we are in the land of the long white cloud with like like minded peeps, no nukes, and loads of singletrack. And a national health care system. Congrats on joining the parenthood club, and if you're ever down this way check this one out karapoti.co.nz. It's a real ass kicker. Look me up. I'll give it a go round with you. Peace. The man who once washed you-know-who's chamois and lived to tell the tale

New Zealand? You bastard. You absolute fucking bastard.

  From: Grillo
Subject: strap on a nut and a helmet
Jonny, it's going to be 50+ degrees outside today, turn off the TV, strap on your helmet and balls, pick out a pony from the bike barn and ride on over to visit Garro's. He will be out in the shop brazing another custom 2 wheeled beauty from his wheelchair. Thankfully my phukked up back feels a bit better today, the sciatic nerve damage and broken disc are finally cooperating enough to allow me to go up the ski hill and strap on the teleboards and make some wimpy turns in the soft snow.......after ski turns, I'll go over and hop on the spinnin' bike at FAC and pedal circles until i'm bored from going nowhere indoors. It sucks you got drilled by a drunk asshole, but get over it and think about riding singletrack again this Summer and cold cervezas post ride. Think about it on the ride over to Mt. Dell.

Peyton Manning gave the Republic(an) party some pocket change for the following reasons,,,,,,,,,
1.He's a dumbass from the South
2. He thinks NASCAR is a real sport
3. The pocket change he sent to the right wingers was an tiny investment/cost to his bottom line. He probably saved a cool million or more on his taxes each of the past 4 years.......maybe 2+ million?
4. He really does believe that WMD's and spreading the love of DEMOCRACY were the real reasons Bush decided to INVADED......oops, LIBERATE Iraq.
5. He watches FAUX NEWS on all of his 14 Plasma Big Screen TV's, even the Mitsubishi in the shitter.
6. Because he chooses to live in Cleveland,,,,,,according to the site you linked, it's his listed residence?

All bike riding is bike RIDING,,,,,,,,freeride, fixie, SS's, roadie action and cruisers for transportation,,,,,,, if it has 2 wheels, some gears or even one gear, pedals and a chain, it's riding as far as I'm concerned....... ride more, talk less. Vance is talking shit about talking shit in his little rant about his Sedona ride,,,,,,shut up and ride, 40 lb bikes and 20lbs bikes are all good, when you ride them! Pedaling a 40 lb bike on the flats in Red Rock country is the same as muscling my 75 lb postal monster on the streets of Flagpole........ it's called riding. SHUT UP AND RIDE!

Fuck Stupor Bowl #41,,,,,,,,,,,I won't be getting stiff in the easy chair watching a bunch of overpaid spoiled douchebags playing their "game" between the lame-ass WalMart and shitty American beer commercials.......and Prince performing at halftime? It hurts to even imagine Prince lowering himself to this rock bottom level.........but maybe, just maybe he really is a football fan and feels honored to be part of the big show? Right, and he's donating his seven figure paycheck to Billy Graham's ministry!

While the subject at hand is football, give me 10 on the Bears and try and take my $20.

The betting department is now closed. And I'm out!


 

Saturday, February 3, 2007
jeanna   I   crissy taylor   I   jamie lynn

24 Hours of the Old PuebloThe Old Pueblo is coming, folks.  And quickly.  Two weeks from today at high noon.  Too late to garner any additional fitness, all you can do now is rest up and hope for the best.

Or, if you're like me or my man Noble, you can sweat things like your tire choice for the next ten days because, well, shit like that really gets in your head sometimes.

I was reading something in the New York Times the other day about how to avoid "boomeritis". Of course, they were taking about America's ageing Baby Boomers and not so much me.  But when I got to the "see how you do on the therapists’ quiz" section, it was like I wrote the damn list myself.  Boomeritis, here I come:

-Is walking up a flight of stairs a strain at times?  Yes.  Just about every time.

-Are you getting up from a chair more slowly than you used to?  Yes.  In fact, I have to use one hand to push my ass out of the chair these days.

-Is it getting harder to look to the left and right while backing up?  It's getting better, but I try and park in such a manner that I can drive straight out when it's time to leave.  And I use the mirrors a lot more than I used to when backing the car.  Parallel parking is a total pain in my ass.

-Do you get stiff sitting through a long movie?  Yes. I get stiff watching a half hour television show on my own sofa.

-Is standing on one leg to put on your shoe difficult or impossible?  Putting on my own shoes was a biggy.  You want me to do it standing on one leg?  Like hell.

-Do you trip or lose your balance more easily?  Trip, no.  Balance?  Yeah right.

-Does walking or jogging a distance take longer than it used to?  I can't jog under doctors orders.  And walking is more of an ugly shuffle.  The last time I saw Snake, he told me after he watched me walk into the coffee shop, dude, you look like you got hit by a car.

If I was 64 it wouldn't bother me so much.  But, truth be told, it would still bother me.

Link dump:

[volume 10] youtube.com
[damn] michaelmoore.com
[fed-x] nationwide.com
[lock bumping] youtube.com
[check this out] drunkcyclist.com/forum...
[page's mechanic beaten in lille] humanpoweredtransport.net

Today's emails:

  From: Keith
Subject: Cheering for a Bush Support
Yep you are. You are hoping the Colts win. And you are hoping Payton Manning delivers.

Payton Manning donated the maximum allowable amount to Bushit in the 2004 election.
newsmeat.com/sports_political_donations/Peyton_Manning.php

You're cheering for the wrong team

Oh god damn it all to hell. Rex Grossman comes up zeroed, but who knows where he stands or how he voted.  Or any of the rest of them for that matter.

It'll drive you crazy if you let it.  I just gotta think about football tomorrow.  That's fucking enough.


 

Friday, February 2, 2007
aimee   I   sammie rhodes   I   erica campbell

Yo, it's Friday.  So what?

Well, there is that little thing called Super Bowl XLI this coming Sunday.  And, aside the fun of watching Da Bears crumble like the hopeless fucks they are, this is the first time that two African-American head coaches will be facing off. 

Although I'm not fond of the phrase African-American (and I can offer no better phrase) this is very cool.  It wasn't so long ago that an African-American coach was a rarity in the football.  I'm not sure if the first coach of a professional football team was Art Shell or Fritz Pollard.  Pollard coached back in 1921, before the National Football League.  Shell coached in the NFL in 1989.  But, not matter.  Either way, what happens this weekend is a step forward for the league, this country and for all of us.

These two gentlemen, Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith, are leading the two best teams in the league in the biggest game of the year.

Perhaps it is a small step, but one of many I hope to enjoy in my lifetime.  Among other things, I'd like to one day see the first President who is Hispanic.  Who is African-American. Who is a woman.

That would really be something.

In real time we have two very viable candidates in Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama vying for '08.  Well, one viable candidate in Obama anyway.  Hillary will fall under the relentless onslaught of all those who still despise her husband and the countless others she's managed to piss off lately.

Obama.  Now that kid has it.  Don't ask me what "it" is.  You can't explain it either.  But we both know, whatever "it" is, Barack Obama is absolutely swimming in it.

Link dump:

[bush knew] truthout.org
[today's front pages] newseum.org
[oh hell] stophernow.com
[huff & puff in the buff] apnews.excite.com
[falling george] planetdan.net
[goodbye cruel world] jonco48.com/
[bring 'em on] truthdig.com/iran_bushs_next_disaster
[michaux endurance series] drunkcyclist.com/forum

It's not often I list porn links on my daily update. But check these new ones out one time:

10 buck movies
dark dick
goo girls
movie drive

And straight to the email:

  From: Corey the Courier
Subject: Fuck January
This is even more of a reason why I will be starting a petition to remove the month of January from the calendars. Every year after my birthday, the Solstice, Chanukah, Kwanza, Christmas, and New Year's celebrations things go bad, really bad. I cannot recall an extraordinary January ever. So in order to implement this idea I propose that we skip January and go straight to May. New Years, hangovers, Bloody Marys and then pull out the grill for BBQ's. For all those sorry blokes who previously had birthdays and other important anniversaries during that time, we'll celebrate that business on Memorial Day.

Corey the Courier
The Man from Big Scrapple

Well, I ain't gonna miss the 24 Hours in the Old Pueblo for nothing. But fuck winter. This shit sucks. Snow-related sports are overrated and lead to homosexuality in kids.

What?

Nothing.

  From: Jason
Subject: ganked bicicleta
Say big Jonny,
Calling all shops in the Az area, watch out for a busted ass bike thief. We had a guy pull one over on one of our new employees. He has some long rap about how he works for a local car dealership and needs a bike for some promotion and bullshit like that. Anyway, he'll talk for about an hour and then he'll ask for a test ride, but he won't have id on him, just his "car keys." then he'll kindly make off with one of your bikes. anyway, the guy is clean dressed and well spoken,, real catch me if you can type shit. Watch out.
Jason @ domenic's

Consider yourself warned.

  From: Vance
Subject: Freeride bashing
Ok, so here's one to print...
I'm tired of all the free ride bashing! You know I ride a Bullit that weighs 40 plus and I like to jump and downhill. Saturday I rode that thing from west sedona down into Carrol Canyon, up Old Postal, up ridge to the top of airport mesa, down Ridge to Secret Slickrock, down to Buhdda Beach, up to Cathedral Rock, over to Bell Rock and over to the Bike and Bean where I gave up and had my wife pick me up. Yes I climbed slow. Yes I blasted the downhills. Yes I stopped at everything resembling a drop or a chute and sessioned it. During the summer, I shuttle, but I also ride that thing UP Mt. Elden. I dare any gram counting x-country rider to ride a 40 plus bike ON FLATS on those rides! When I see that, I'll be more than happy to listen to opinions about what is "real mountain biking." The gauntlet has been tossed. Either shut the *%)& up about what is real riding, or come out with me, trade bikes and let's see who hangs.

Since I can't ride any bike anywhere at the moment, I'll not be joining you for the Tour of Pain.

Two wheels, pedals, a chain... It's a bike.

  From: Daniel
Subject: Lubbock Texas???
Here is what is happening out in Lubbock, Texas. There aren't any mountains, but we do really have trails and people who don't like us on those trails. Thought you might find an interest in this article.

This comes from lubbockonline.com

Man faces assault charges in war against bicyclists
BY JASON WOMACK
AVALANCHE-JOURNAL

A man who police say used wires, broken bottles and nails to wage an ecoterrorism campaign against Lubbock cyclists could spend time in prison.

David G. Knape, 62, of Lubbock, staged at least a year-long campaign against unsuspecting cyclists, according to police reports. He stretched wires between trees at "neck level" and put nails and glass in the pathway of cyclists.

"This could kill someone," Dewayne Wallace, an avid cyclist whose friend was flung from his bicycle and cut across the neck by one of the wires.

Wallace spent months looking for Knape, who now faces two felony charges of attempted aggravated assault with a weapon.

Each count is a third degree felony, carrying a maximum penalty of 10 years in prison.

Detective Rene Martinez questioned Knape about the traps placed along the mountain biking trails, just east of Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard and along Canyon Lake No. 6.

The trails are used by families and joggers and are designated for biking. Amateur and experienced riders frequent the paths.

Knape told the detective he was only trying to protect the environment.

"He just loves nature," Martinez said.

Phone calls placed to Knape went unanswered.

Cyclists did not always have a name to connect to the traps found along the trails. But many knew of the hazards and would even warn each other on internet message boards.

"There were numerous traps along the trails, including wire strung between trees and chest/neck level," according to a March 26, 2006 posting on the Caprock Multi-Sport Club Forum. "Be careful out there."

Lubbock Police Capt. Lance Slack, who also rides a bike, said cyclists need to warn each other, but they also need to notify authorities, particularly when people can be seriously injured.

"People have been seriously hurt or killed just because they are cyclists," he said.

Wallace said he tracked Knape for about 6 months. He photographed the wires and footprints. He then turned it all over to police.

At first, he suspected a teenagers, but whoever was setting these traps was "too energetic," he said.

Large rocks had been pushed into the trail and wires that cyclists had taken down would reappear. Whoever was setting the traps was just too persistent.

"I was memorizing his pattern," Wallace said. "We were not out to beat him up or kill him. We just wanted him to stop."

Wallace caught Knape during an afternoon bike ride in November.

Knape was tying a wire to a tree, according to reports.

In statements to police, Knape said he was trying to protect area wildlife.

"He was trying to protect something we care about too," Wallace said. "I care about nature. That's why I ride a bike.

A Lubbock County grand jury is scheduled to review Knape's case next week.

I'll tell ya, when shit like that starts happening, no one wins.


 

Thursday, February 1, 2007
tabatha stevens   I   caro   I   savannah monroe

"M" was complaining the other day of feeling sick.  She told me her "head was fucking killing" her.   Maybe I caught whatever she has 'cause now my head is fucking killing me. 

Well, it is the cold and flu season.

It's been snowing pretty much continuously here in Flagstaff. This is what it looks like outside my window today.  And I've been no farther from the house than the curb to pick up my newspaper.

Happy, happy. Joy, joy.

Link dump:

[vonnegut] books.guardian.co.uk
[redpath and pennington cleared] velonews.com
[cool] xpn.org
[blogness] bikeblog.blogspot.com
[yo, what?] playintrafficproductions.com
[oh hell] foxnews.com/Iran_War_Clouds
[surge bigger than we thought] tpmmuckraker.com
[it had to be iran] talkingpointsmemo.com

Today's email:

  From: Lopo
Subject: global switch off. Feb 1st
Turn everything off
On February 1st between 7:55 p.m. until 8 p.m.

Urgent: action against climate change
On February 1st you can participate in the worldwide greatest action against climate change!!!

Various environmental organizations are asking the peoples of this planet to hold 5 minutes of silence:
Everyone should turn off all lights, electricity etc. between 7:55 until 8 p.m. to bring attention to other inhabitants, the media and politicians about the daily waste of energy. An act which takes only 5 minutes, which cost nothing, but shows the governments that climate change should be on the top agenda of worldpolitics.
Why this date?
On February 1st the United Nations is publicizing the newest results and knowledge base on climate change.

SO...TURN OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Faites passer.
On éteint tout le 1er février de 19h55 à 20h00
Urgent : Action contre le changement climatique Le 1er février 2007: Participez à la plus grande mobilisation des citoyens contre le Changement climatique !
L'Alliance pour la Planète (groupement d'associationsenvironnementales) lance un appel simple à tous les citoyens, 5 minutes de répit pour la planète : tout le monde éteint ses veilles et lumières le 1er février 2007 entre 19h55 et 20h00. Il ne s'agit pas d'économiser 5 minutes d'électricité uniquement ce jour-là, mais d'attirer l'attention des citoyens, des médias et des décideurs sur le gaspillage d'énergie et l'urgence de passer à l'action ! 5 minutes de répit pour la planète : ça ne prend pas longtemps, ça ne coûte rien, et ça montrera aux candidats aux élections législatives de juin 2007 que le changement climatique est un sujet qui doit peser dans le débat politique.

Pourquoi le 1er février ? Ce jour là sortira, à Paris, le nouveau rapport du groupe d'experts climatiques des Nations unies. Il ne faut pas laisser passer cette occasion de braquer les projecteurs* sur l'urgence de la situation climatique mondiale.

* Est-ce vraiment le meilleur terme ? (CVE)
Alles Ausschalten
am 1.Februar 07 von 19h55 bis 20h00

dringend: Aktion gegen den Klimawechsel

Am 1. Feb 2007: nehmen Sie an einer weltweiten, großen Bewegung gegen den Klimawechsel teil!

Verschiedenste Naturschutz-Organisationen senden eine Aufforderung an alle BewohnerInnen unseres Planten, die 5 "Schweigeminuten": jeder soll Licht, Strom und sonstiges ausschalten, zwischen 19h55 und 20h00.
Fünf Minuten, nicht nur um Energie zu sparen, sondern besonders, um die Bevölkerung, die Medien und PolitikerInnen auf die tägliche Energieverschwendung aufmerksam zu machen.
Ein Akt, der nur 5 Minuten dauert, der nichts kostet, der aber der Regierung zeigt, dass die Klimakatastrophe ein schwerwiegendes Thema der Weltpolitik sein sollte.
Warum dieses Datum? : Am ersten Februar veröffentlicht die UNO die neuesten Erkenntnisse zum Thema Klimawechsel!

Also......DREHEN SIE

Five minutes? Everyone can do five minutes with the lights off.

Oh wait, you mean I gotta turn off my computer for five minutes?  Really? I can't just dim the monitor?  Not write any emails?  Turn off the music?

What do you people expect from me?  What the hell am I supposed to do for five mintutes, sit here and shiver in the dark.

Come to think of it, that's what I do most nights.

  From: Kark
Subject: Deconstructing the cycle myth..
yo Jonny,
r/e that linked article from The Scotsman..

Holy wow. What a sad load of fuckwit drivel that was. Like so many media editorials it's fairly obvious intention is to polarize readership and further accentuate divergent positions rather than to illuminate any common ground or (god forbid) offer real solutions or compromise.

And while I'm sure it sells copy, after all, nothing moves media 'units' like controversy. the big problem is that the fat, waddling, weak minded struggler masses buy into that shit like it were much more than the sorry piece of editiorial-tainment that it is.

..Which isn't to say I don't appreciate a good rant. no, I'm actually a big fan of the rant. The rant can be a healthy means to vent. Providing it's presented in the appropriate context.

A bar for instance.

A bar is the perfect place for a someone to hold court and unload on some subsect of society and provide fellow bar patrons with a bit of a laugh. Context is key. In a bar everyone knows they're not to take seriously the whimsical opinions, angry diatribes or witless schemes of their fellow drunks.

e.g. nobody rolled or batted eyes at my rocket powered canoe idea not long ago. Indeed, I had even managed to put together a mini 'nasa' team for design and testing but sadly we couldn't put our hands on a rocket at 1:30 on a Sunday morning ..but anyway we weren't really willing to leave the bar to look for one and risk missing last call. (So you see, a bar has inherent in it's design something of a built in safety system for daft ideas and vicious rants)

Not so with print media. Print, TV, internet is "out there" for all manner of sober but weak mind to gobble up as if it were a mathematical proof rather than the vacuous claptrap it is.

And this example in The Scotsman is one of the sadder examples. Just look at the introduction.

"Some of my best friends are cyclists. Indeed, there is a bike somewhere in my outhouse.."

This is precious. I love this weak-assed insincere pre-apology to try to offset the vile, mean-spirited bullshit that's to follow. It's like someone saying "Now, I'm not racist but.." and then unloading some immigrants-are-ruining fill in the blank bullshit. or "I feel sorry for the poor, I really do, but we need to bring back lynch mobs to deal with shoplifters.." etc etc. And so, in that linked example via The Scotsman, right there once you see that insincere apology you know the author should be beaten til mushy with his keyboard.

And lets not forget to precede that vicious beating with a halfhearted "Gosh, I'm real *sorry* but I'll just now have to batter you about the face, neck, breast, chest and head.."

so yeah, there you are.. That about sums up my opinion of that article and it's author.

Good times as always.

  From: Mike
Subject: what?
what would you do if Bush starts a shooting war with Iran?

I mean as a person, as a citizen of the US?

I've been thinking about it. If Bush pulls yet another Hitler move, and starts shooting at Iran, what am I supposed to do as a citizen? Should I just go shopping? Should I participate at a sit-in at my Congressman's Office?

What would you do?

Moving comes to mind. But then, where could I go?

  From: Tony
Subject: They invaded Irag so that....
We'd have an "easy" IN to Iran. At least that's what seems to be the popular thought. Yeah, that went over real well, nice thinking.

Hey, how you like that article that came out two days ago about the FBI collecting all internet traffic and then deciding on a target? Check it out here: (news.zdnet.com) if you haven't read it. You'll mostly enjoy the comments section. After reading some of them, I wanted to gouge my eyes out!

The "in" is never as hard as the "out". You'd think people would get it after Vietnam and now Iraq and Afghanistan.

But what the hell do I know anyway? Besides the fact that the comments following that article were written by a bunch of scared sheep who can't see past the shit they get on Fox News every night. All they see if "fear".

What they fail to see is what is being taken away from them. The Government doesn't have the right to fish around on the internet, phone lines or print letters. It it not a debatable point. They do not have the right.

Looks like we all need this:  mysecureisp.com.


 
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