About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

25 thoughts on “Martyn Ashton

  1. If I tried any of that shit I’d end up in the ICU.

    Great music too. First time I’ve ever heard music on this site I liked.

  2. …hey – wait a minute…you can’t do that on a road bike…

    …why, it’s physically impossible to begin with & one has to think about the sensibilities of the staid, unsmiling ‘hardcore’ roadies & the image they’re trying to preserve…

    …awesome stuff, mr ashton !!!…

  3. I knew there was a good reason to keep my carbon road bike with Zipp wheels. Now to go out and have some fun at the bike park.

  4. I fugured out his secret— it’s that five-bolt, asymmetrical pneumatic dropper seatpost. Couldn’t tell from the video whether it had the “full race” decal set, though.

  5. I just watched it again, and I was wrong. He’s not clipped in. I spied the platform pedals in the opening sequence. Dude is still a bad ass, but I’d love to see how many of those tricks he would commit to while clipped in and wearing a carbon soled shoe. I can tell you how many of them I would try… ZERO.

  6. Gypsy,

    Do you sometimes find yourself in near-fights with dudes who are like 200 lbs heavier than you, and you “woulda kicked his ass, seabass,” except for the 2 skinny ladies “holding you back?”

    “Stop holding me back!”


  7. @Danimal Whu-Huh? I’m 165 pounds of peace and love, baby… No fights for me. If you actually bothered to read my comment(s), you would see that what I actually said was, A- The dude is a bad ass, B- On first viewing I thought he was clipped in, C- I was wrong, but I wonder if he would try any of those stunts if he was, and D- I would never, under any circumstances, try any of that shit, clipped in or not. There was no self aggrandizement anywhere in either comment. I would apologize for not being as clear as I could have been, but based on your comment, you’re just a troll that likes to sound tough on the internet.

  8. …gypsy n’ danimal…now, now, cease & desist…you guys are both just upset that those two chicks at the end of the video won’t lube & wipe down your shit at the end of the day…

    …just sayin’…

  9. Fake! How do I know? Women in Britain just don’t look like that (attractive, tanned, perfect teeth).

  10. Back-flip out of the sand-trap takes the cake. Try riding skinny tires through bottomless sand some time… then do a backflip… on a road bike… Am I hallucinating?

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