Flagstaff, this is Caveman and I’ll dance naked around you…

Man, I just read all of your comments.

I know for a fact I could rollerblade  down to your area and raise serious havoc on all of you. First I’ll come to your local bar and pee on all your shaved legs then kick all of the spokes out of your bikes and beat all your bikes into tiny pieces. After that,  you’ll probably want to fight like female kitty cats; well, I’ll have you chase me for about a half hour in your flaggy high heals with socks on.  Then when  I see you run out of cat nip, I’ll knock every one one of you down to the ground like 10,000 angry elk on PCP storming your habitat.

That’s not the end… I’ll be sending you all out first class UPS to an island where you can all bitch at each other and maybe have a few good jerk off sessions before one of you sick meat eating donkey dick fools want to start eating cock to stay alive.

But seriously, bring your comments into my zone! First person to give some good feedback gets a light bulb shoved up their ass and punched in the throat. When I punch you, I’ll have my little pecker out waving it in the wind to let you know that I’ve got my cock out and we are gonna rock out, bitches.

You can even pick the song to dance to. Don’t worry,  I can dance to anything.

Updated video thanks to Trailer Park Cyclist.

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About caveman

I am... Caveman. Spokane, Washington, USA

43 thoughts on “Flagstaff, this is Caveman and I’ll dance naked around you…

  1. yesssss! well deserved by the trolling flags. they can stick their hands in ass and jerk off with shit

  2. Hey, where do I sign up for the light bulb in the ass. Cavey, I’ve no idea what the fuck your referring to, whether your two turds short of a pile of shit, or what, but I kind of liked it. Now back to the light bulb in my ass.

  3. I’m not from flag,but for now I live here.I’m kinda confused why most of you guys hate the whole bunch of us. I’m not attacking you at all,just asking if this is real hate or just some hazing type tough guy shit.cheers anyway, bonne route!

  4. I just like talking shit and since this last week a few flaggers had to get all their cheerleader cunty sauce all over this site, I thought it would be fun to say something retarded while wasted. I do love getting drunk and getting all of you balled up and have to comment on here. I have no feelings so jab away princesses.

  5. …cavey…read that n’ thought “…yep, drunk rant…most likely wadded up by all the crap flowing out a’ flag & under the dc bridge & i wonder what he’ll see when the light of day hits his words ???”

    …knew it wasn’t too serious so, bwahahaha

  6. if ur talking about shaved legged dudes up in flag you are missing the mark. and as with anything, FLG rocks, but a few rotten apples, as they say…

    Either way, you need to sharpen your pencil if you’re going to be the “rant guy” for DC because that shit was weak. in fact, maybe you ought to just stick to imagery. you are no writer.

    and put the booze down my friend. you are only heading for more regret, and there really is no “party” that revolves around this blog. quit fooling yourself.

  7. WTF – “cheerleader cunty sauce”?? dude, go back to the stone age and shut your hatchet wound!

    and come on folks, a few surly apples are what keeps FLG real. keep FLG weird! keep FLG green!

  8. If they’re only a few bad eggs, where are all the cool FLG people? Speak up, kiddies! I know you’re out there. I’ve met y’all.

    Oh, and FUCK THAT D2 DICKHOSE.

  9. Gnomer, you should head up the hill to CO sometime soon. A good shred and then some fine beverages on the town would be just fine.

  10. Hey Joe: what whiskey are ya drinkin? I started with some Connemara peated Irish Whiskey but have moved on to some Auchentoshan Scotch. Both quite delicious. I’ve got the Maker’s on standby for a bit of bourbon fun.

  11. RtooDetoo… sippin yer fancypants whiskey and scotch. That’s so bourgeois, you pie-faced dilettante! Drink beer or die. And we eat the rich. Get a haircut you Boulderite trustfunder…

  12. Yeah, fuck D2 and his stupid whiskey and scotch! He’d be drinking PBR if he was a real man! He’s a bourgeois, pie-faced dilletante rich boy! Never mind that he’s currently unemployed and broke! D2′s a big fat bitch and he should get his Boulderite trustfunder ass off of DC, because DC is legit! FatBob knows best!

  13. …my friend howard (who’ll tell ya i’m his riding coach so it’s kinda obvious he’s got low standards) mixed sound for george thorogood on the road for many, many tours…

    …& personally, i’m with hurben…i can listen to a couple a’ songs but i ain’t a fan…

  14. Haircuts are for people with jobs and money. I have neither…besides, in the winter it keeps me nice and warm. I’ll chop it off when it gets warm, perhaps.

  15. Fuck you TPC !!

    I’m gonna be humming that all day.

    You bastard.

    Liquor and whores, liquor and whores

    lol

  16. pointless as usual. think i’ll take a month off from reading this site and see whether it has improved.

    can’t imagine wanting to spend time trying to start nonsense centered around who lives where and who is slightly less banal but no more intelligent while drunk.

    i remember when this site had thoughtful writing on relevant topics and sometimes it still does but there’s too much dumbness now.

  17. …i’d like to add to the intellectual content of this post by pointing out that both ‘alley oop’ (oop, oop, oop oop) & ‘popeye’ (the sailor man, toot toot) suffer from the same genetic abnormality…

    …they’re noted for their physical prowess & strength & yet in both cases their bodies could be considered deformed with matchstick biceps & skinny thighs but disproportionately massive forearms & calves…

    …has a dna test ever been run on these two guys ???…

    …beyond that, i could only suggest that the real neanderthals in flagstaff aren’t named ‘caveman’

    …i mean, i’m just sayin’…

  18. Jesus Titty Fucking Christ.

    It’s been a full day and I’m still humming that song.

    Liquor and whores, liquor and whores.

    I am truly a sick man.