Just in… Keith Richards is a Drunk Cyclist AND a baller

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I just got an email from a guy name Hank and he sent this in –

Long time reader, first time e-mailer. I can’t find a direct e-mail into the DC site but thought this to be relevant material you would forward to the DC mothership.

Keith Richard’s autobiography “Life” includes evidence that he is a baller on the bike (albiet at age 4), making him most definitely a Drunk Cyclist.


Thanks Hank!

Keef -- the DC

Keef -- the baller

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About caveman

I am... Caveman. Spokane, Washington, USA

31 Replies to “Just in… Keith Richards is a Drunk Cyclist AND a baller”

  1. lets see…a post about Black Sabbath, one about Lemmy, and now one about Keith Richards? Which one of these guys is a giant sissy compared to the other 2?
    This is not straight baller

  2. …keef sez, “fuck me, mate…wifout ‘jack’ in me system & a guitar in me ‘ands, i got balance problems, ya ???…i still ride a fookin’ trike !!!”

  3. If I’ve learned one thing over these last couple of posts, it is that I need to start drinking considerably more Jack Daniels and harder the fuck up.

    But that might be just saying the same thing twice.

  4. Jim Beam is my poison of choice, Boss, but yeah. Booze and Rule #5 seem to go hand in hand.

  5. JTE, haha, i was going to post the same thing. when i drank whiskey, it was JB. cheap, kentucky whiskey. if we only had a few bucks, we’d go get a pint and chug it down in devou park, overlooking the city. good times. goddamn it’s busy at work tonight. wish i could have a shot of JB right now.

  6. That Coors can reminds me that I live down the fucking street from the plant here in Golden, CO.

    Just picked up a sixer of Extra Gold. When was the last time you guys drank that swill? $4.49 baby!!!

    Life is good. I could ride circles around Keith but I can’t do coke like him. :(

  7. Keef has always been the man, if you don’t understand his contribution you don’t understand the music period.

  8. Is Keith mixing the Jack with Coca Cola? Fucking lightweight Brit sissy boy.

    Nice hair, though, just needs a bit of chiffon to finish the look.

  9. This might be sacrilegious on DC, but ignore the booze before, and notice the crowd behind.

    How many here could front a crowd like that ??

    Keith is DC.

  10. Yeah if you missed it before …he owns the title …more drugs more women more cool …all worldclass

  11. …if there is one thing keef fucking richards is NOT, it is a “Fucking lightweight Brit sissy boy.”…guaraaantee…

    …keef fucking richards ate your lunch today, son, then he got your momma high before they ‘did it’ in your bed & all just so he could throw his head back n’ larf his keef fucking richards larfff…

    …he’ll prob’ly write a song about it, it’ll be a big hit & you’ll think it’s great…

    …keef’s like that, so i’m just sayin’…

  12. the stones are pansy spawn. if you want to gayley bob your head to the likes of “start me up” and “brown sugar,” go ahead. altamont-be-damned, those fruits have nothing to do with the music of conquest, triumph or balldom.

    being a manorexic guitar tickler with a cheesecloth liver is not baller, and we’ve all sat for a photo atop a 3-wheeler before finding the real gospel.


  13. the music *I* like is better, more legitimate, more underground, more influential, more complex, more simple, more uber, more unter, more more and more less than the music *you* like.

    ergo, I am more in touch, more untouched, and more more than you. roar..

  14. Let it Bleed, Exile on Main St., Sticky Fingers, Beggars Banquet… Those 4 albums rewrote rock music. Tattoo You was a halfway decent album, but that’s when they started their long descent into caricature suckdom…

    But… Kark +1. Roar.

  15. …kark…well, yah…it could be no other way…

    …& ‘member, we’re talkin’ ‘keef’ & not the ‘gather no mosses’

    …bonus points for keef (1) – “to be fair to the ‘h’, i never once caught a cold when i was using, ya ???”

    …(2) – first rocker i ever heard of who went down to some little island retreat in the bahamas once a year to get hooked up to something like a dialysis machine to get his blood ‘cleansed’ so he could go back to his ‘lifestyle’

    …proof is in the pudding…look at the faces…
    …ozzie – slightly bloated but looks damn a-ok for a maniacal 60 something rock god…
    …lemmy – bit older looking but doin’ great for another 65-ish serious-ass hardcore rocker…
    …look at keef’s face – ‘that’, amigos, sez it all…

  16. why are you all you guys referring to him as keef?

    lemmy was a speedfreak. that shit is like the fountain of youth. except for what it does to your teeth.

    keith was a heroin addict, it makes you look 20 years older instantly. he looks like he had a little cosmetic work done at some point. and that blood cleansing shit they did? off the hook.

    ozzy can’t even speak a sentence, he is still on pain pills (the bloatyness) and xanex and all kinds of shit, i am sure. his brain doesn’t function right.

  17. @nyhc00 – quit shoppin’ haha! crack me up. what did ozzy and howard have to talk about? how hot his daughter kelly looks now?

  18. …nyhc00’s bwaha holiday shoppin’…

    ‘keef n’ the uniballer – the smackdown…takin’ it to the slopes’

  19. Yeah Judi, somewhat about his kids, and how easy they have it. Ozzy has a new album out, talked a bit about his friendship with Elton John, and a whole bunch of other randomness.
    Recently Stern has had Billy Joel and Jay-Z as guests, both very interesting people.