Nothing makes so much sense to me as when systems are thrown a wrench. Tiles defaced with mockery held tight by nail polish. Monkey wrenching, as it was meant to be. Before glorification came byway of that cock sucking fraud Abbey. No grand fantasies such as Glen Canyon. Rather, simple inspirations defined without conspiracy to whittle against the power that be. Feathers on mountains. Bicycles on city streets. Hardly noticed. Neverminded. As if Hayduke signed a contract with Jeep like his name was Howie Long. One more book sold and nothing more to make of it. But instead, some douche is going to buy a sticker, believe in it, and be awesome instead.
Appropriately, it only makes sense that as winter unfolds all I can think about is two wheels drifting when in actuality, I should be thinking instead about dropping knees and sucking cock… er, I mean telemarking… not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’m sure I’ll come around to the snoward way of considerations soon enough, but now, as it is, I’m thinking of heading south once again to make up for this lost time with my baby Dirt via the desert.
Because Morris lays down the Beta on a new ride he’s configuring from the sierritas to arivaca. Take a gander. Mining tunnels to ride through, Narco trails as far as the eye can see, you name it. Only in Southern AZ can one feel that their association with or without the US of A has little relevance to the issues at hand. What a blessing that feels like. And it should go without saying that Morris is a gawddanged configur’er at the very least.
Moving on to the true past time, Grumskikorsakov hits up the cutting edge of brew with the following beer report claiming 32% is quite a rational. Everyone, feast your eyes on “Tactical Nuclear Penguin” beer. Yes. At 32%, I’m a little nervous and perhaps they are too according to the warning label:
“This is an extremely strong beer; it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance”
Of course, that was followed up by a ban of an 18.6% beer from local pubs which is a blatant conundrum as one would expect from a governmental agency:
An 18.2% beer made by a controversial Scottish brewery should not be be sold by bars, clubs and shops across the UK, a watchdog has ruled.
Again, from the bbc.
Of all the places where the restriction of alcohol should be an issue, certainly it should not be Scotland. I always knew I didn’t like government of any kind for very good reasons. They fucking ruin it.
Thus, as it is, I’ve considered from time to time what it means to be a Drunk Cyclist as if there is an etherial meaning to being both drunk and riding a bicycle. In reality, there is no more importance to this effort than an 8 meter stumble from a wambling bike. And so it is. My pondering has no viable depth. Instead: drink, stumble, drink, stumble. Be merry. Why I search for more is beyond me. Thanks to Liam for pointing that out.
The rationalization of consumption however, is relevant. As almost all of use know, life is a buzzkill that needs a consistent argument. Take, for instance, Tiger Woods. The man is on top of the world and even there, with millions of accolades and dolla dolla bills, shit still sucks balls. But if Tiger’s gonna smack a bitch up, then stuff the Escalade into a tree, well, maybe it’s a good time to check up. You know, rethink the science? Downhill is a fast slope. Be sure you want to hit it before you do. Just say’n. Not like I know.
props to KJT for the drop.
December 5th, 2009 at 6:53 am
Gnome… one of your all time best posts.
December 5th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Beer??
Make mine a Summit ESB!!
Thank you very much!
Peace,
Joboo
December 5th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
Yes indeed, another good post. Sierritas – Arivaca link is quite nice. Photos capture a good piece of the So.AZ mtb feeling.
The route directly through the heart of Tucson though? I can understand ditching into the 4th st. area for a drink, but the east-west broadway/speedway type route would blow. or perhaps make you appreciate the rest that much more…
December 5th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
Yeah, lotsa pave’ through Tucson, perhaps a necessary evil if you’re gunna bikepack from home. The idea is to split it up too. Half on the way out and half on the way in. We’ll see how it flows soon enough.
Good stuff, Gnome.
December 6th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
i’m gonna jump you little man next time your in the vicinity of the old aligator juniper and the RR / LB interchange.
December 6th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Hayduke, you had better be talking about giving my man high fives and hugs at the rail road crossing. I’m pounding myself silly with 6 hours of sleep night after night and prepping for finals 10 hours a day. I’m in no mood for threats against the DC family. None. Nada. No shorts and no sleep. Think about it.
December 6th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
re: The government of Scotland irrationally messing with brews and distillates. Pols and bureaucritters can’t help themselves and it has always been that way. Witness this petition by Bobby Burns, the man who rightfully should be the poet laureate of all drunken cyclists. http://www.robertburns.org/works/87.shtml
December 8th, 2009 at 4:57 pm
the little green man called out HD 1st. pop pop pop. and that’s a singletrack intersection not no traintracks.
December 16th, 2009 at 5:24 pm
the fact that someone (manyone)agree is enough to say. don’t call out Hayduke. he’ll get ya.