I got rear ended this morning on southbound 51. Good times. Traffic was as traffic is in Phoenix – a fucking parking lot. I was thinking to myself something stupid like “today would be a good day to get rear-ended… nah, it’ll never happen…” Then came the thud. I looked back in my rear view mirror at a young woman in a white minivan, her eyes wide and mouth hanging agape. I put on my turn signal, and she followed with hers. We worked out way over to the median and got out of our cars. I walked to the rear of my ten year old Oldsmobile and gave my rear bumper a once over. I glanced over at the front of the minivan that hit me, and went back to my bumper. Nothing.
My car looks pretty much as it did before she hit me – like a clapped out piece of domestic shit. As I walked over to her car, she started to say “I only took my foot off the brake for a second…”
I interrupted and asked if she was ok. She said yes. I looked at her and said, “I think we should call this one ‘no harm no foul’.”
“Oh, thank you!”
“No problem. High five.” We slapped hands, turned back to our respective cars, waded out into the heavy stream of traffic and got on with our lives. I’ve got plenty on my plate and I could give a fuck about my bumper in the grand scheme of things. I turned on the radio and what did they play? Motley-Crue’s Shout at the Devil. I choose maximum volume. You should to.
Update: The pic is something that was sent to me last night via text message on my phone. I saw it, and it made me happy. So I posted it with this little story. Seemed to fit.
April 3rd, 2009 at 2:13 pm
…didn’t have time to read the post but, fuck, that foto sez it all…THAT is talent…
April 3rd, 2009 at 3:13 pm
that car still runs? You admit to still driving it? You had that beast back here in Tucson.
April 3rd, 2009 at 4:05 pm
Rodney Carrington’s “Titties and Beer” comes to mind….hmm
April 3rd, 2009 at 4:14 pm
good job man. you made her day. if more people handled “situations” with that mindset the world would be a much nicer place to live.
April 3rd, 2009 at 4:16 pm
It’s great that the future attorney decides to let it slide. I love it!
April 3rd, 2009 at 5:06 pm
You’re gonna make a shitty attorney dude!…. Just teasing… That deserves an “Atta Boy!”… Give yerself a pat on the back, from me…
Does this mean you’re not going to be an ambulance chaser? Or have you just not completed your training?
April 3rd, 2009 at 6:00 pm
This is probably old, but so are many of BJ’s links.
Amstel Light “beer bike”
http://jezebel.com/5197071/dutch-treat
April 3rd, 2009 at 7:44 pm
Right on! That is the kind of simple coolness that seems to be ever harder to find, glad to hear you handled that situation in such a fashion.
Just having to deal with Phoenix traffic alone is enough to send many into a rage, let alone an extra hip check from a mini van.
Good on you man. I have been the recipient in a similar situation and it made my day for many obvious reasons.
And the picture was the cherry on top. Or two cherries may be a better comparison…
April 3rd, 2009 at 8:21 pm
good call…
April 3rd, 2009 at 8:39 pm
nice. (both)
April 4th, 2009 at 12:46 am
All Natural Ingredients.
Rocky Mountain Spring Water.
Milwaukee’s Best.
Could be any of them.
April 4th, 2009 at 2:26 am
…ok…like 12 hours later i’ve had time to read the post…nice, well played, sir…
…heart warming & i’m talking about both the story & the foto…
April 4th, 2009 at 2:41 am
thanks for adding porn!
April 4th, 2009 at 6:23 am
Nice job Jonny, maybe there is hope for lawyers after all, my overriding question though, How full is that beer?
April 4th, 2009 at 6:55 am
best.coozie.ever.
And good on ya for being a good guy….whenever I do something like that, it seems to make the world a little less dismal. Then I turn on the TV and am reminded how stupid people are. Haven’t been watching much TV lately…and I’m happier. Gotta be some lesson to be learned in there somewhere, methinks.
April 4th, 2009 at 7:31 am
Wow! Is that the chick who rear-ended you? I wish she’d rear-end me!
April 4th, 2009 at 10:40 am
Whole new meaning to the phrase ” dick Coozie “
April 4th, 2009 at 11:01 am
Hey man always know what goes around comes around. Nicely done. And where the fuck can I get a drink holder like that. I have been looking for one for the boat. I figure my wife will never notice.
April 4th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
when is DCGear.net comin’ back?
April 4th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
You want some DC gear?
April 4th, 2009 at 3:34 pm
I always want DC gear…
Especially if it comes with tits.
April 4th, 2009 at 7:16 pm
uh…I’ll order one of everything if it comes with tits.
forgot to say, nice job being cool.
April 4th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
Is that a twist off or did she have to use her opener?
April 5th, 2009 at 5:57 am
…in retrospect, i’m now starting to worry that she might widen that “gap” & then something i’d like put in that ‘gap’ might fit a little loosely…
…& if even one of you sez “hey, that wouldn’t be a problem for me”, then i’m gonna suggest you post up w/ the evidence…