57 Responses to “Can a brother get a Goddamn?”

1. schultzenheimer on November 18th, 2008 7:57 am

   hello kitty

2. Mega on November 18th, 2008 8:02 am

   A little man-ish in the face.

3. John on November 18th, 2008 8:34 am

   vanderkitten!

4. bikepunk on November 18th, 2008 8:36 am

   GOD-FUCKING-DAMN ! ! !

   My 3 inches of doom are going to be sore tonight !

5. deprogram on November 18th, 2008 8:41 am

   Man-ish? Hmmm. Yeah, she clearly doesn’t have a great deal of body fat.

   +1 for hot.

6. Gordon on November 18th, 2008 8:52 am

   she hates earwax.

7. John on November 18th, 2008 9:19 am

   Huh, what did you say?

8. TC on November 18th, 2008 9:42 am

   I am jealous of her bike.

9. HUMPTY on November 18th, 2008 11:21 am

   Dear Chris,

   Knock it the fuck off….I can’t be walking around the office with Lil’ Humpty staring at the chandelier…

10. bikesgonewild on November 18th, 2008 11:22 am

    …try http://www.lizhatch.missingsaddle.com/ & look through her flicker fotos…tell me what those say…

    …man-ish ???…you are are mega-fucking-clueless, dude…she is smoking hot from head to toe…even ‘maxim’ magazine did a foto shoot of her…man-ish ???…bwahhaha…you are a twisted fool, amigo…

    …the truth is that liz is actually an awesomely sweet chick but this past racing season “hardened her the fuck up” because as strong as she is on the bike, & she definitely is strong, she’s still rather new & inexperienced to close quarter work in the peleton…

    …i’ve got a feeling ‘09 is gonna be a whole new ballgame…the vdk’s won the national team crit. championship for ‘08, she’s got a great coach in rz & she took enough shit last year for her inexperience that i’ll bet she comes back w/ a vengeance…

    …& lizzer ???…hats off, baby…you got it goin’ on, both on & off the bike…keep kickin’ ass…

11. Bill B. on November 18th, 2008 11:48 am

    she used to be a local, her dad still lives down here. i have never seen a picture of her that does her any justice and i have seen the maxim photos. she is phenomally attractive, a good bike racer and a pretty cool chic who will drink beer out of the bottle.

12. ColonelSanders on November 18th, 2008 11:49 am

    Hot, tall, skinny and big knockers.

    My kinda gal.

    I would last, at most, 13 1/2 seconds with her.

    And that’s after a nap and a big bowl of Wheaties.

13. GettinDivorced on November 18th, 2008 11:59 am

    Yes, HAWT DAMN! I am glad to call myself a roadie. We need more of them in the pack.

14. glen Q on November 18th, 2008 12:19 pm

    Giggety….

15. c.price on November 18th, 2008 12:53 pm

    Packing my bags and getting the hell out of Nova Scotia.

16. Gorilla Luv on November 18th, 2008 1:08 pm

    Manish Hell, she just has her game face in place, and a game you can’t touch Mega wimp! Come on admit it you are whackin in the closet to that pic.

17. racerhead on November 18th, 2008 1:28 pm

    Ahhh, yeah. The closest thing we had to that, “back in the day”, was Carol Addy….but holy fuck…she’s really nice lookin’.

18. dentext on November 18th, 2008 1:38 pm

    there, now was that so hard?
    Now post 3 pics a day like that, and DC will be rolling in..
    Well, actually DC will be rolling in just about anything.

    attaboy.
    more of em.

19. uglyyeti on November 18th, 2008 2:02 pm

    Hottest picture ever of a girl on a bike. Ever. Somebody please prove me wrong. I’m waiting. Anxiously.

    Diddy and Serena licking a headset would not compete. And not just because they lack UCI points.

20. uglyyeti on November 18th, 2008 2:08 pm

    Even if it were a loose ball headset, dripping with lube – and totally threadless!

21. TC on November 18th, 2008 2:24 pm

    In my next life I wanna be her bike seat.

22. scorekeeper scott on November 18th, 2008 2:28 pm

    I bet you guys didn’t even see the note on her handlebar tape that she put there for me!

    love you to babe!

23. Jimmie Proof on November 18th, 2008 2:40 pm

    everyone of you guy’s knows she’s crazy!

24. Buck on November 18th, 2008 3:08 pm

    Ma’m, clean your top tube? No charge!

25. flaherty on November 18th, 2008 3:36 pm

    ho lee shit! meow now!

26. Chris D on November 18th, 2008 4:12 pm

    You will never guess how I found this sweetness on myspace.

    I googled “Trek Bikes Suck” and she myspace was in the top 5 pages.

    She has since changed her page a bit. It used to have all sorts of Peloton pics. Looks like she is going with a dot com job in her name.

    And I used to think Rebecca Twigg was hot.

    and yeti my man you are right and the thing that makes her so damn hot is the fact that she is the real deal on the road as well. The chick can flat out mash the power meter and break legs. the only one hotter is maybe her leading out the group with her full zip down to about her belly.

    excuse me….

    there is a video of her floating around that shows her personality. I think it is on the vanderkitten site. not only is she smoking hot but she is just cool down to earth low key.

    oh and the beer out of the bottle seals the deal.

27. butthead on November 18th, 2008 4:17 pm

    Myspace Profile Tracker World Visitor MapI hate dirty ears, earwax is not my friend, The sound of people chewing food makes me want to throw up, I brush my teeth at least 5 times a day, I love cyclists legs, Trek bikes suck, I can spit like a boy thanks to my friends Vinnie and Adam’s expert instruction, I’d rather have bikes than kids, I race with lipstick in my jersey pocket, I hate Florida, There’s nothing better than a good quality chamois and nothing worse than a shitty one… Road rash turns me on, I forgot that one! My sister once threw a toothpaste tube at me and almost blinded me, but the eye patch I got to wear for 3 weeks was super cool! Thanks sis! I fell out of a moving car when I was three. When I got to the hospital I cried more about not being able to play with the toys in the waiting room than from the pain, I love watching people throw up and I love when they take blood at the doctor’s office, I have a weakness for guys who smell good, even if they’re ugly. Trek bikes still suck, ask George Hincapie(ha) who, by the way, will never win Flanders because you have to actually attack at some point in the race to win. My bike is sexier than I am, and I’m not mad about it. Fried okra is orgasmic, and cous cous is not bad either…Something new that I hate… The sound of someone talking when they need to take a big drink of water… Does anyone know what I mean?
    My Interests
    2007 Cyclocross World Championships “It’s the ambiguously gay duo!”
    I’d like to meet:
    A boy with an ass like this. “Hi, my name is Bjorn and my job is to be really really good looking. Oh yeah, and I ride a bike too.”This man. On the left. Not Hincapie.This should happen more often… My new bike. Hot right? Fast too! Yes, Jimmy, there are naked men on my page. And you, Van Petegem, put your tongue back in your mouth! Why does he even bother? Just let it go. There. Much better, Rene! Real men wear blue lipstick. “Weeeeee, I won a bike game!”
    Music:

    Movies:
    Move, move, move. I’ll show you how it’s done, dude!Why is he always picking up his teammates? “OH! I found a four leaf clover!!!”
    Television:
    Arrested Development, The Simpsons
    Books:
    This is the Norwegian cycling team. I guess they ride bikes differently there.The Dark Heart of Italy, East of Eden, anything written by Oscar Wilde, Beach Music Is it just me, or is he taking the whole “Lion King” thing too far?
    Heroes:
    Bart Wellens, Badass MoFo
    My Background and Lifestyle
    MaritalStatus: In a Relationship
    Ethnicity: White / Caucasian
    SexualOrientation: Straight
    Hometown: Austin, Texas
    Children: Love kids, but not for me
    Occupation: circus monkey

28. vincevega on November 18th, 2008 4:40 pm

    She had some strong back beat tunes on her page for a while and she once ripped George Hincape for not attacking in the classics.

    I would love to see her grind in a french disco drinking a long neck after a hard day in the saddle…..

    my kind of chick

    mmmmmmm

29. Nick on November 18th, 2008 4:54 pm

    Liz is way hot… vanderkittens rule.

30. Jefe on November 18th, 2008 6:09 pm

    Time for a Bukaki!!!!!!!!!!

31. Mega on November 18th, 2008 6:22 pm

    Hey, I’d still hit it. I’m not that descriminating.

    Please check the jaw line…Cheek bones to ear placement and stern eye/eyebrows. They are masculine features. Give her a little scruff, an adams apple and a spiked haircut and you have a skinny Ivan Drago.

    She’s hot..but model hot and madison avenue tends to like women with man-ish facial features.

    Could be the one pic, didn’t really research it.

    PS – You are all secretly major cock goalies.

    that is all.

32. Mikey on November 18th, 2008 6:59 pm

    she appears just a little pouty and probably should be spanked.

33. Ridin at 4:20™ on November 18th, 2008 8:11 pm

    She’s hot, there is no dispute there. Over-played, over-rated??? I say hell yes. I’ve seen plenty of hotter chicks, they just don’t feel the need to flaunt themselves all over the net. Pride, in the name of Love…

34. me on November 18th, 2008 10:33 pm

    I’d throw my back out on her. and my wife would throw out my lame ass…

35. Bowl Of Dick on November 18th, 2008 11:07 pm

    I’d hit that on primetime with the wife and kids watching

36. Laker Girl on November 18th, 2008 11:08 pm

    She’s so fine I’d suck her daddy’s dick.

37. pirata on November 18th, 2008 11:10 pm

    Ah yes, back to some normal shit after the election.
    Good post man, good post.

38. bikesgonewild on November 19th, 2008 1:44 am

    …you are fucking amusing ‘mega’…

    …listening to how you assess the lovely miz hatch makes me wonder exactly what you look for in a woman…maybe “a little scruff, an adams apple and a spiked haircut”…

    …& amigo…i’d love to see just what you actually “hit”…strike that, i don’t really wanna know but i’ll bet it ain’t close to liz hatch hot…

    …just sayin’…

39. Bowl Of Dick on November 19th, 2008 6:58 am

    lighten up mega man we are all just sayn’ and you are missing the point of all the shit we spew here. we are durnk. we ride bikes and this woman happens to ride and I mean really ride a fucking bike and she happends to be hot as hell and we are not scared to hide behind our keyboards and say it.

    and motherfucker I married a chick with spiked hair and a little adams apple you might say; that along with the fact that she drops me on the climbs is why I did.. BTW if you click to the right on the SG link you might find a lot of women just like her. and if that makes me gay then yup I suck a mile of it.

    there is an allowable level of comedy on here still I think you macho fuckstick.

    or maybe you are the guy who never admits to jerking off. or maybe you are that guy who is the only guy in the room who cares if everyone knows that you are are not gay.

    so proud. yea that guy

    this cock goalie will give you a free pass to eat a bowl of dick after Bikesgonewild sets the table

    Now what makes Liz hotter is that she rides a 700cc wheel set with drop bars and gears and she called out George Hincape for never attacking in the Classics.

    word to her mother.

    Finding her site from a google search under “trek bikes suck’ happens to be the funniest shit I have ever read on this page.

    like a motherfucker on prime time fo sho, yo

40. butthead on November 19th, 2008 7:24 am

    link to a cool interview

    http://blog.ahrensbicycles.com/2007/12/liz-hatch-interview.html

41. ClitSweller on November 19th, 2008 12:03 pm

    She looks like she could be Precious’ big brother from the neck up.

42. bikesgonewild on November 19th, 2008 12:15 pm

    …butthead…great link to a sweet definitive interview…the lizzer is a hot babe w/ some big bike racing heuvos…love it…

    …monday, i did an up & over mt tam loop in the glorious sunshine, lookin’ out over the ocean & the bay & today’s gonna be the “paradise loop” miz hatch speaks of as a favorite…but today looks like belgian weather, all grey overcast, cold & shit…

43. snailskier on November 19th, 2008 1:54 pm

    if only my face were her top tube……of course….we wouldn’t be debating her facial features, as they would be tangled in ecstasy….c’mon guys, we don’t even really know if she’s even got a nice ass!?

44. Mega on November 19th, 2008 6:09 pm

    Too funny. Just cause I think some chick looks like she might have used Floyd’s testosterone scrot patch more than one you get all butt hurt. Whaaa. Now say it with me, “I will break you”. Feel better?

45. Gnome on November 19th, 2008 7:56 pm

    Yea, good interview BH. Nice to see a bit of the reality behind the hotness and she’s a smart girl as most of them are. The fact that she digs Ludo is top-notch. Guys that ugly don’t get enough respect and if anything, she needs to be more flamboyant with what she’s got.

46. Joe on November 19th, 2008 8:12 pm

    LOVE ME!

47. yer mom on November 19th, 2008 9:33 pm

    Something is wrong when the first thing you can say about yourself is you dont like ear wax.

    Red flag.

48. Laker Girl on November 19th, 2008 9:53 pm

    mega the whole point is TOO FUNNY bro

    lose the personal pronouns

49. butthead on November 19th, 2008 10:10 pm

    word bikesgonewild

    Today I took a training grind to the top of the fireroad here in socal on the cross bike then back down; minimal dismounts realy only when I thought I saw some ditch weed. all the time thinking what if this was me in Paris Roubaix and Liz was there watchig…. let me tell you that the 39/25 killed me and reminds me why I never did the singlespeed thingy. I had to dismount to get over some rocks I normally charge over on the 5 Spot. I dropped my i phone and happened to notice that my server was still open to this page and this thread. So I proceeded to rub one out. wtf it was a Wednesday after the fires and no one was around. all good

    word

50. bikesgonewild on November 19th, 2008 11:21 pm

    …too fucking hilarious, butthead…almost back-snorted the hot chocolate soy milk out the breather holes…if ya did it on a bike ride, i think even the lizzer could get a laugh outa that…& a cross bike ride somehow seems appropriate…just sayin’…

    …laker girl…i’m sure the hatch daddy would be down w/ that, baby…lucky man, by proxy…daddy done good…

    …gnomer & bowl a’ dick…doesn’t she just make ya proud that some great lookin’ chicks race bikes hard & talk straight shit…w/ the occasional sly & knowing smile & a long neck in hand…

    …man o’ man…two serious ass road rides this week…both of a different nature & i can honestly say i left it “all” out the road both days…beautifully glorious…italian opera, rock & roll & my heart & head just fucking sing…

    …oh yeah, lest i forget…mega…re: “say it w/ me ‘i will break you’ “…nobody here gives a rat’s ass if you wanna humiliate yerself, dude…the collective “we” just don’t wanna watch what you oughta be paying a “dom” for…
    …“we” know what “we’re” lookin’ at when we’re scopin’ & diggin’ on the lizzer…

51. bmisfit on November 20th, 2008 12:56 am

    That’ll make a man take back shit he didn’t even steal. Just like our Punk Rock Cycling team here in town.

52. Corey the Courier on November 20th, 2008 4:38 am

    Yay, spank naughty pics back on the menu at DC!

53. schultzenheimer on November 20th, 2008 8:54 am

    manish? you must be a bitter woman.

54. Mikey on November 20th, 2008 10:39 am

    Butthead-

    Half the idea of a ‘cross bike is running a 36/27, you know, for the sand and mud. Leave the 39/25 for your road rocket.

    Helpful as always,

    Mikey

55. peg leg on November 20th, 2008 12:10 pm

    I’d kill myself if I was promised to come back as her chamois.

56. butthead on November 20th, 2008 7:25 pm

    Mickey

    find me a 36 for a 130 bcd

    whats the other half now. Fitness right?

    Besides I mash the 39 cuz; my knees were just weak. and I run 52/42 11/23 on the roadie

57. Mikey on November 21st, 2008 1:02 pm

    butthead-

    Sounds like your ‘cross bike needs a new crank set. The D-A is nice. Or like FSA or something.

    If I ran 42/23 on the Trophy Bike, I’d be walking up some of the hills around here. Those are Midwest gears.

    Mikey