No one loves a Tuesday. Not even the bastards mother…


The snow and cold weather just keeps on coming through. People keep telling me, “Hey, at least the trails will be in great shape!”

Yeah. In August. Good thing I’ve got the Drink of the week.

Could be worse. But I’ll complain anyway. It’s just what I do. And I do it well. What I have is a gift. And it is something I owe to the world to share. And share I will.

I got a couple of stickers in the mail the other day from my man K-Fed. Fucking kid is off the chart. You should check this one out, you might enjoy it as much as I do:

From: dave
Subject: Serious team racing
Let it be known that an anonymous friend form Tennessee (after rocking his own Cat 3 crit) went to the local bar, purchased multiple beers then used their restroom to combine them in a large styrofoam beverage container, and returned to the scene of the crit to drink and celebrate! He is dedicated to the DC cause. Let it be known!

Dude. We lost another one to the lite side.

This message is to ALL of my friends and fans. I wasn’t sure how exactly to start this…but I trusted that God would help me write this and maybe through me I could speak His word and make His will be done…..

For a long time I have been very lost…
Read it:

Ah hell. I just hope she’s happy doing whatever it is she’s doing.

Two Belgian beer fans have launched a video game named ‘Place to pee’, which allows players to slalom down ski slopes or kill aliens while relieving themselves at urinals.
Read it:

Fuck yeah. Usually I just entertain myself by trying to piss between the wires on the electric fence out back.

From: Chris
Subject: drunk driver
I wanted to alert you guys to another near biker-down event and the inept and infuriating response of the local police. Total bullshit.

Yeah. That was total bullshit.

I’ll leave you off with these two gems by Tokyo Police Club. I know a sum total of dick about this band. Other than the fact that I like both these songs.

Tokyo Police Club – Nature of the Experiment

Tokyo Police Club – Your English Is Good


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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

12 thoughts on “No one loves a Tuesday. Not even the bastards mother…

  1. I hear its cold out there, but fuck, you must have frozen your balls off to be drinking that shit! In Kentucky, I’m pretty sure that drink would be illegal! Even my girlfriend would hate on that, bourbon and sprite is the only thing to quench her thirst!

  2. Dear Tokyo Police Club,

    New Kids called and they wanted you to open for them on their “sit your no talent ass down” tour….they also asked for their lack of talent back….

  3. Dear porn starlets… Go back to doing something we ALL can enjoy. God ain’t gonna do shit for you, but my cold hard cash will ALWAYS pay the bills.

  4. Tuesday gets blind drunk, being tuesday, and tries to shoot itself out behind the weekend, but it’s ok,
    Tuesday Weld was hot once, Fat Tuesday is kinda kool. and then tuesday realized most cheap food places have specials on tuesdays, and went on a binge.

  5. …well, erica looks poor but healthy & happy sitting there stroking her bunny…

    …unlike jenna ‘the duck-billed’ jamison who looks wealthy but unhealthy & only half happy sitting there stroking her tito…

  6. Chick keeps talking about “the hole getting deeper” and then suddenly God fills it. God must be HUNG.

    And yeah…it was 85 here Monday and 45 yesterday. 43 when I rode in this morning…I f’n hate spring.

  7. Spring is over in my hood. Yesterday it was mid 80’s and clear… today 32c, cloudy and sticky like a porn stars chin after her first audition.

    I just hope it stays dry enough to let me take the Great white Hope out for her initial bikepark foray.

    And Jenna got a lot of work done, but previous to that, she was in some people’s eyes…’attractive’. I never thought so, but I like mine different than most people. Nuff said.

    Happiness comes out of a .5litre bottle from Augustiner IMHO.

  8. Turns out, while the Belgian’s were conducting tests on their urinal video game, they found Elvis.

  9. RE: Erica Campbell

    blah blah blah… “and the hole gets deeper.”
    blah blah blah… “fill that hole in my soul.”

    Damn! Poor choice of words!

  10. serious team racing. who is this guy and why is he not on my team? (shameless plug) seriously, send that dude my way.