Thursday’s Poem – The deal

The deal

I thought
I’ll show them
I as failed
every class
my last semester
save the two
I actually needed
to graduate.

In them
I got C’s.

Ms. Fogel
took me aside
one day
And told me
I would fail her class
If I continued
on my
present course.

I told her
that it didn’t
matter.
She said
you won’t graduate.
I said I didn’t
need her class to graduate.

She took me aside
the next day
and told me
she had spoken
with my guidance
counselor.

I remember thinking
to myself
I don’t talk to that
fat fuck
unless I
absolutely
have to.

I can’t believe
you went
and did so
voluntarily.

She said,
you’re right.
You don’t need
my class
to graduate.

I’ll make you a deal.

Sit in the back
of the room.
Don’t disturb
the other students.
Don’t
do any homework.
Don’t
take quizzes or tests.
Just
don’t
make a scene.

You
don’t
bother me
and I
won’t
bother you.

It was a deal
I made in
many classes
that last semester.

I graduated
in the bottom
fifth
of my
class.

And I
have never
looked back.

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About big jonny

The man, the legend. The guy who started it all back in the Year of Our Lord Beer, 2000, with a couple of pages worth of idiotic ranting hardcoded on some random porn site that would host anything you uploaded, a book called HTML for Dummies (which was completely appropriate), a bad attitude (which hasn’t much changed), and a Dell desktop running Win95 with 64 mgs of ram and a six gig hard drive. Those were the days. Then he went to law school. Go figure. Flagstaff, Arizona, USA

8 thoughts on “Thursday’s Poem – The deal

  1. I failed Geometry, but didn’t need it. I did need the credits though, so I had to take one class in summer school.

    I chose some B.S. art class. I am the only member of the class of ’88 and 1/2

  2. Big Jonny–

    A proud leader of the “whatever” generation. You owe your wealth and fame, and the worship of your minions to such sound decision making. Keep on.

    Mikey

  3. …wow, i’m lookin’ over my shoulder at my past, wondering how in hell you coulda followed me through highschool…

  4. woulda been a better poem if ms. fogel had been smokin’ hot & demanded sexual favors for her cooperation.

  5. in high school I skipped so much school they wouldn’t let me graduate until I made up some of the time. I spent 3 days after school ended in the library shelving books…